Coping with a Smoking teenager in a non smoking house !

The issue of a 6 year old and 16 year old sharing a bedroom is not the point of this thread, dont be judgmental as you dont know the OP's situation.
 
flowrider99 said:
The issue of a 6 year old and 16 year old sharing a bedroom is not the point of this thread, dont be judgmental as you dont know the OP's situation.
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I kind of agree but on a deeper level it may have some impact on the 16 yros behaviour. (or I might just have been spoilt having mostly had a room of my own).
 
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Sorry just to clarify , she plays plays in the bedroom but now sleeps in our bedroom thankgod .. Our current financial situation limits us unfortunately .. We spoke to the housing association and there waiting list is ....don't go there ! We were offered council based housing but the areas were chav paradise with high crime rates !

Thanks for you understanding , I know its not right a 6 yr old sharing a bedroom with 16 yr old but I have no other option right now ..
 
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Rroff said:
I kind of agree but on a deeper level it may have some impact on the 16 yros behaviour. (or I might just have been spoilt having mostly had a room of my own).
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Well, i don't want to sound mean, as ofcourse we don't have the full picture here, but if i was the OP's kid, i might be a bit peeved and rebelious if my dad told me i cant have my own room because of financial constraints whilst having just bought a £1000+ gaming laptop :p
 
Jono8 said:
Well, i don't want to sound mean, as ofcourse we don't have the full picture here, but if i was the OP's kid, i might be a bit peeved and rebelious if my dad told me i cant have my own room because of financial constraints whilst having just bought a £1000+ gaming laptop :p
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I have to own at least one toy :D On a serious note its a bit more complicated than that :)
 
Granny perfume is another option, every time he comes home stinking of smoke, just tell him he stinks and liberally douse him in the cheapest most granny smelling perfume you can find to get rid of the smell!
 
you gotta do something man, i was in a similar situation [minus the weed and disrespect] and not gonna lie i wish me ma had given me a clip round the ear and got me to stop then because it's hellish to try and stop now.

your son sounds like he's fallen in with a bad crowd and trust me, better you give him the wake up call before a judge or a doctor does.
 
Malevolence said:
A slap around the ****ing head. It worked wonders before the politically correct brigade infected society.
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It works until the child gets to be the same size as you. At which point you often find what you've actually taught them is physical power determines who's the boss.

Presumably they are still dependent on you for money. Don't give them any if they're spending it on cigarettes. You obviously can't stop providing basic necessities, but other than those, you're not obliged to support his habits. This can give you a way of exerting your authority. There are a lot of other little ways you can do this once you find the will for it. This wont be pleasant, though. At sixteen, your son is biologically (though not mentally) ready to go out and build their own position in the tribe (evolutionarily speaking). But they're stuck in a child role in their parents home. Moving from the plains of Africa has its downside. So you're set up for a nasty conflict, potentially.

But it's you and your partner's home. You can't let your son be in charge of it. You're both just going to have to keep standing your ground over and over until the situation changes. You can also consider prioritizing your daughter's welfare. She is still a child dependent on you both whilst your son is approaching adulthood and independence (you hope). Remember that she is learning all the time from how you handle this situation. You need to consider how she will see you based on your interactions with your son. Don't underestimate the importance on this on how she grows up. I know confrontation is hard so I'm saying this to highlight the importance and that's it not just about your son smoking. If you think a rebellious teenage son is bad, wait until you have a rebellious teenage daughter. Setting the right example now is vital.

Jono8 said:
Your 16 year old son and 6 year old daughter share a bedroom? :confused:

Edit - just been answered - wow
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I think that "wow" is a little harsh. Both rent and house prices are horribly high at the moment. There are many people living in less than perfect conditions through little fault of their own. And by historical standards, sharing a room with your brother is far from the worst that children have had to endure. At least they have parents that care about them.
 
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Gilbert89 said:
Perhaps point him in the direction of the Vapers Lounge within the GD? :p
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Still an addiction to something not very good for you. Though better than smoking so would be an improvement at least.

ThaReaperGuy said:
I think the wow was more a reaction to the OP answering the question immediately before Jono posted.
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Ah, I misread it as a YouTube style "really??!!??" comment. Apologies, then.
 
h4rm0ny said:
Still an addiction to something not very good for you. Though better than smoking so would be an improvement at least.
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Agreed, at 16 he cant have been smoking long so getting him off them now is gonna be better in the long run.

Dont get me wrong, vaping is great *takes a drag of his vcmt* but not for this situation methinks.
 
It was only a joke guy's :p

Not sure what to suggest, Very difficult one but since a 6 year old (Kinda, as mentioned second hand smoking etc) is involved I think some tough love has to be involved.
 
As a child of the 1990s, I suffered from travel sickness (hated the smell of petrol). I would ask my dad to smoke his cigarette and that would ward away my sickness. Job's a good 'un.

End result: I never smoked, and Dad gave up a few years later.

Nanny state can suck my big 10" :-)
 
When I was a lad, a common thing parents did to stop their kids from smoking was to sit them down with a pack of twenty and force them to smoke them one after another. In many cases, it certainly stopped them from smoking again!

Of course, in these namby pamby days, some people would probably consider that abuse :rolleyes: but it's worth a thought.
 
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