On The Wagon... then in 'ere!

[Jimbeam3678]

How's everyone getting on in here?

 

[phonemonkey]

How's everyone getting on in here?

Still sober. Celebrated my 3rd anniversary of sobriety the week before last. Life isn't easy but it is Definately better than it was.

Just on my seventh beer-free day here.

I hadn't been deep in the sauce like some of the stories I've read, but it had definitely become a bad habit that had left me overweight and feeling unhealthy after a few years slipping back into it.

I wasn't getting particularly drunk, wasn't passing out at night, wasn't having blackouts or anything like that - but it was persistent heavier-than-is-healthy drinking. Like four or five cans of beer almost every night as the kids went to bed, and that going up to six or seven from Thursday to Sunday. I stuck to lower alcohol lager (3.5-4%) to try to mitigate the impact, but it was still, of course, far more than is healthy (I guess it was an average of eight units Mon-Weds and 10-12 Thurs-Sun - so around 70 per week!). Once a fortnight or so I'd somehow end up having around 20 units and feeling absolutely **** for a couple of days. Basically, I was in a rut. I couldn't think of what to do in the evening unless I got some beer in, and I felt I had to get at least four or five in so I wouldn't worry about running out (this was a warning sign that things were not in control!). This had been going on since around mid-2015.

I was more than a stone overweight, flabby, and feeling generally lethargic. My mental health was deteriorating noticeably as well.

When we went on holiday last month I resolved to use it to be more active and to drink less. I only had a couple of beers each night, and swam about a mile a day - and started to feel a lot better.

Unfortunately, my first week back at home (and back at work) I fell right back into my old habits and did no exercise at all and drank the same old amounts again.

Then last Monday I caught sight of myself in the mirror (I'd been avoiding full-body mirrors for some time...) and resolved I had to change.

That was the last night I had a beer, and I've been back on my intermittent fasting diet and lifting weights again to try to improve things.

Had two almost sleepless nights at first, but I already feel ten times better than I have done in a couple of years.

I hope I can keep it up this time. I think I need the pull of exercise and physical improvement. Whenever I've quit over the past two years without weight lifting I've always relapsed. As my wife says, I'm all or nothing! So I'm counting calories and macros, timing meals, drinking protein shakes, recording workouts. No desire for alcohol at all right now and I feel healthy, alert and happy. I need to remember that, and to remember how lethargic and grotty I feel when I have beer every night!

Probably my first real test will be when I have to get the evening train home tomorrow - I pass an offie on the way to the station and it was my habit to start the evening with a beer or two on the train if it was leaving after 5pm...



I never found it helpful. I'm not sure how generalisable this is, but for me drinking alcohol-free beer just meant I was thinking about beer and actively trying to deny myself the alcohol. The beer-like taste always kicked off my desire for more (proper) beer anyway.

Some of it tastes quite nice, but generally the more well-regarded ones I've found a bit hoppy for my liking (can't remember the names now, though).

UPDATE: Well, I successfully avoided the temptation of train beer on my two early evening journeys this week, which I am pleased about. Also feels good making an estimate of the money I've saved just in 10 days or so of not buying beer all the damn time...

Good going mate, glad you're feeling a bit better. I'm amazed at the amount of money I used to spend on booze and what I was prepared to go without to ensure I had money for it.

You know where we are so keep us updated. We would love to hear how you're getting on

How do people find alcohol free beer? been drinking way to much lately and want to look at cutting back.

They're not for me. I didn't drink for the taste I drank for the effect l and so feel that it would be pointless to drink non alcoholic beers. I also worry that starting to drink them now would be a sign I was 'slipping or that is develop a thirst that couldn't be quenched by a non alcoholic beer.

That said, if they help you to achieve what you're looking for then go for it.

 

[strumpusplunket]

Still sober. Celebrated my 3rd anniversary of sobriety the week before last. Life isn't easy but it is Definately better than it was.

Good going yourself! I'm hoping to keep up the sobriety long-term here, too. Three years is a great milestone!

Good going mate, glad you're feeling a bit better. I'm amazed at the amount of money I used to spend on booze and what I was prepared to go without to ensure I had money for it.

You know where we are so keep us updated. We would love to hear how you're getting on.

Well, it's now 10 weeks since I had any alcohol. Still feeling good. My body, mood and productivity have been completely transformed, actually.

And, yes - the money! I was shocked when I checked my bank balance after my first whole month of not drinking - hundreds of pounds more in there than normal (of course, this was immediately offset by having had to replace the phone I lost in a lake, but still ).

So glad I managed to give up. My wife has cut out the red wine too, and we're both feeling much better for it.

One thing I've noticed is a gradual change in my diurnal rhythm. My bedtime has been creeping forward, and I've been waking up earlier. When I was drinking, I would stay up until midnight or 1am doing nothing much with my time, and feeling tired and miserable in the morning (I notice on all the photos from this time my eyes look exhausted!). Now I feel ready for bed by 9:30 every night and wake up naturally at 6:30. Early morning weight training is probably having an impact there, too. A much healthier way to live, though.

This thread has gone a bit quiet. Hope everyone else is doing okay.

 

[Jimbeam3678]

That’s why I gave it a bit of bump. 3 years no booze next week so quite happy with that considering I never intenionally stopped.

Feels loads better for it though.

 

[khemist]

Not had a drink since the first week in February when i was in a really awful state, highly doubt i will be touching anything over Christmas and new year.

Been keeping busy with motorbike lessons and even worked my day off today, something i would never have done had i been drinking.

 

[new boy]

Still following doctors orders and keeping to government guidelines for alcohol here.

Decided not to go to the work xmas party this year for the first time.

 

[strumpusplunket]

Stag do at the weekend. I've spent the past week agonising over what to do with regards to booze. The groom is a big drinker (and an old boozing buddy with whom many multi-day drinking benders were partaken back in the day), but the rest of the group are not generally very heavy drinkers so hopefully something civilised can be agreed.

It will be three months give or take since I've had any by the time I fly out...

 

[phonemonkey]

Stag do at the weekend. I've spent the past week agonising over what to do with regards to booze. The groom is a big drinker (and an old boozing buddy with whom many multi-day drinking benders were partaken back in the day), but the rest of the group are not generally very heavy drinkers so hopefully something civilised can be agreed.

It will be three months give or take since I've had any by the time I fly out...

I'd give it some serious thought. I was told to avoid pubs and clubs unless i have a legitimate reason for being there. I took that advcecto heart and though I'll go for a pub lunch, I generally won't go to 'get drunk' occasions. If I do I make sure I drive and can leave when I like. Drunk people make me uncomfortable and bored by turns and there's always the risk I'll chose to 'fix' that discomfort by having 'just one drink'.

I'm not sure I'd fly out anywhere with a bunch of people heading out on the lash, but we are all different and if you think you can then go for it but carefully. Perhaps arrange some stuff that doesn't involve getting smashed, and if necessary have your not drinking excuses ready. Drunk people like trying to force drinks on non drinkers.

 

[strumpusplunket]

I'd give it some serious thought. I was told to avoid pubs and clubs unless i have a legitimate reason for being there. I took that advcecto heart and though I'll go for a pub lunch, I generally won't go to 'get drunk' occasions. If I do I make sure I drive and can leave when I like. Drunk people make me uncomfortable and bored by turns and there's always the risk I'll chose to 'fix' that discomfort by having 'just one drink'.

I'm not sure I'd fly out anywhere with a bunch of people heading out on the lash, but we are all different and if you think you can then go for it but carefully. Perhaps arrange some stuff that doesn't involve getting smashed, and if necessary have your not drinking excuses ready. Drunk people like trying to force drinks on non drinkers.

I am the best man, so not going doesn't really feel like an option. The thought of drinking is really unappealing, though.

I do know that one other guy who's going hardly ever drinks, and then never more than one so I am planning to stick with him and we will have a united front against over-indulging activity.

I mean, sure the groom and I used to knock them back 10-20 years ago, but he's nearly 50 now and I'm comfortably over 40, so I'd hoped we've mellowed...

 

[UberTiger]

You could say you're on medication that won't allow you to drink that weekend.

 

[phonemonkey]

I am the best man, so not going doesn't really feel like an option. The thought of drinking is really unappealing, though.

I do know that one other guy who's going hardly ever drinks, and then never more than one so I am planning to stick with him and we will have a united front against over-indulging activity.

I mean, sure the groom and I used to knock them back 10-20 years ago, but he's nearly 50 now and I'm comfortably over 40, so I'd hoped we've mellowed...

I get what you mean about not going not feeling like an option. Ultimately, of course, it is but it would be tricky. Sticking to the other non drinker is a good idea, as is having your excuses ready. If these are people you've drunk heavily with in the past then, in my experience, they'll take some convincing to accept the fact you're not drinking. Of course you could always take the groom to one side and explain the situation honestly to him, if he's a good friend he should understand and support you and the others will take their lead from him.

Whatever happens good luck.

 

[strumpusplunket]

I get what you mean about not going not feeling like an option. Ultimately, of course, it is but it would be tricky. Sticking to the other non drinker is a good idea, as is having your excuses ready. If these are people you've drunk heavily with in the past then, in my experience, they'll take some convincing to accept the fact you're not drinking. Of course you could always take the groom to one side and explain the situation honestly to him, if he's a good friend he should understand and support you and the others will take their lead from him.

Whatever happens good luck.

Yeah, I am thinking ahead to how I'll handle others' drinking, especially the groom. I've already spoken to the other non-drinker and said "look, I've not drunk any alcohol for about three months, I'm planning on not drinking and I don't think I can handle it being a wild night." We are of one mind on that score.

I've also thought about just ordering myself non-alcoholic beer, but that kind of hides the issue rather than facing up to it.

Well - thanks for the support, dude. I'm steeling myself here!

 

[phonemonkey]

How are we all doing?

How was the stag @strumpusplunket

@Jimbeam3678 congrats on your three years dude.

@khemist there are lots of benefits to sobriety. Being responsible and productive are definitely two I enjoy as well.

@new boy well done, I hope you keep it up. Avoiding drunken situations and places seems wise to me.

Anyone else joining the party?

 

[strumpusplunket]

How are we all doing?

How was the stag @strumpusplunket

@Jimbeam3678 congrats on your three years dude.

@khemist there are lots of benefits to sobriety. Being responsible and productive are definitely two I enjoy as well.

@new boy well done, I hope you keep it up. Avoiding drunken situations and places seems wise to me.

Anyone else joining the party?

Oh yeah... it was fine, actually.

A couple of people were a bit surprised. Didn't turn out to be a big deal in the end when I said I'd quit, though. Groom asked how much I was drinking before I quit, agreed it was too much and that was that. Waking up the morning after a stag do with a clear head was a nice novelty

Trust you're doing well too?

 

[phonemonkey]

Oh yeah... it was fine, actually.

A couple of people were a bit surprised. Didn't turn out to be a big deal in the end when I said I'd quit, though. Groom asked how much I was drinking before I quit, agreed it was too much and that was that. Waking up the morning after a stag do with a clear head was a nice novelty

Trust you're doing well too?

All good mate, thanks. Life's just ticking along nicely.

 

[Jimbeam3678]

All fine and dandy here. As I've said quite a few times don't even give it a second thought until I see this thread or someone asks me in real life. Certainly no regrets. Had my fun booze and still have my health intact wouldn't change a thing if I could go back in time.

 

[CrimsonAvenger]

Nearly 11 months now. In a new relationship. She drinks, not a lot but fairly often. Been away on holiday all inclusive, so plenty of drink around. Around alcohol more than I've been in quite a while. Social groups have changed and everyone likes to get together fairly early and get blotto. Find that particularly difficult and obviously December being the month of being ******, Xmas parties etc. Toughest challenges yet to come I feel. Internally for me I don't miss it. Being around others that indulge is still hard. How do others cope with friends/partners knocking it back when you're in their company ? TIA.

Well done to all of those abstaining or cutting back. Hope you're all feeling the benefits.

 

[CrimsonAvenger]

Not had a drink since the first week in February when i was in a really awful state, highly doubt i will be touching anything over Christmas and new year.

Been keeping busy with motorbike lessons and even worked my day off today, something i would never have done had i been drinking.

Similar time scale to me with early Feb too

 

[phonemonkey]

Nearly 11 months now. In a new relationship. She drinks, not a lot but fairly often. Been away on holiday all inclusive, so plenty of drink around. Around alcohol more than I've been in quite a while. Social groups have changed and everyone likes to get together fairly early and get blotto. Find that particularly difficult and obviously December being the month of being ******, Xmas parties etc. Toughest challenges yet to come I feel. Internally for me I don't miss it. Being around others that indulge is still hard. How do others cope with friends/partners knocking it back when you're in their company ? TIA.

Well done to all of those abstaining or cutting back. Hope you're all feeling the benefits.

I get what you mean. I live alone and don't come into contact with alcohol and/or drinkers very often. I don't keep alcohol in the house and I usually avoid 'wet places'. I've found that most guests don't drink excessively when staying at mine. My sister might have a glass of wine, perhaps a bottle of wine over the weekend for example but that's it. Getting drunk alone is not much fun after all. If I'm out, either at friends/ loved ones house or at a pub/ restaurant then generally I'll drive. I find its important to be able to leave if it starts getting too much, and I usually find myself spending time with other drivers or non drinkers.

I try to limit my exposure to it all, carefully picking which events I'll go to and which I decline. I also make sure I attend lots of meetings around this time of year. Having a social group that doesn't drink helps to limit my exposure, as does having a social life that doesn't involve the pub.

 

[CrimsonAvenger]

A

I get what you mean. I live alone and don't come into contact with alcohol and/or drinkers very often. I don't keep alcohol in the house and I usually avoid 'wet places'. I've found that most guests don't drink excessively when staying at mine. My sister might have a glass of wine, perhaps a bottle of wine over the weekend for example but that's it. Getting drunk alone is not much fun after all. If I'm out, either at friends/ loved ones house or at a pub/ restaurant then generally I'll drive. I find its important to be able to leave if it starts getting too much, and I usually find myself spending time with other drivers or non drinkers.

I try to limit my exposure to it all, carefully picking which events I'll go to and which I decline. I also make sure I attend lots of meetings around this time of year. Having a social group that doesn't drink helps to limit my exposure, as does having a social life that doesn't involve the pub.

Totally get this. I live with my partner. Our social circle and their age group are typical i.e. 99% drink and on occasion drink to excess. I don't think me leaving her to it at a social do or not going would go down to well.

That said at home with her or on my own it doesn't bother me.