Dealing with Cancer

Soldato
OP
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TheWirral
well he had his PET scan yesterday. gets results next Thursday.
then a small op to look in the front of the tummy soon before they can give
the go ahead for the stomach removal op if everything is clear.

ahh the waiting lol.
 
Soldato
Joined
23 May 2006
Posts
6,724
just a progression of my other thread really:

https://forums.overclockers.co.uk/threads/stomach-ulcer.18850421/

TLDR: my dad (74) was diagnosed with stomach cancer last week
In it's early stages (described as evidence of cancers cells around the ulcer) and has not spread.
find out treatment options soon.

I know I'm not the only person to be effected by this disease (cancer).
I think I'm sort of in the limbo stages at the moment as we are yet to hear
treatment options.
Part of me feels sad for my dad, another part feels angry and another part of me
has accepted that he may not make this journey and i need to get used to this idea.

I was just curious if anyone else had gone through these stages, whether you was ill yourself
or a family member.
I'd be interested to hear some personal stories of success and loss and if loss is your story
was it kind of a release of emotions to know the effected person was free of illness/pain.

my dads option will either be surgery to remove part or all of the stomach.
another option would be chemo.
my dad is 74 and i wonder to myself maybe chemo although unpleasant could keep it in check for a few
years instead of major surgery which "may" reduce the quality of the rest of his life.

anyway thanks for listening but would appreciate any replies even if short :)


I hope it all goes well for you and your family. Every time i see my parents they seem that bit more frail - my dad is 73.

My grandad had bowel cancer, he was... must have been late 70s. obviously we were all terrified, at that age any surgery is risky..... however he came through it and lived to the ripe old age of 94.

The surgery went really well, the chemo made him feel rough at the time, he lost a lot of weight and hair, but it was not all terrible, and he got through and and it meant he got to see me get married (twice) find out he was about to be a great grandad - sadly never saw him - and had another 15+ years of life much of it cancer free.
I would say be with him when he sees the consultants as in my grandads case at least the shock meant he did not take it all in, and just support your dad as much as you can and hope he takes the docs advice.
 
Soldato
OP
Joined
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Posts
3,340
Location
TheWirral
I hope it all goes well for you and your family. Every time i see my parents they seem that bit more frail - my dad is 73.

My grandad had bowel cancer, he was... must have been late 70s. obviously we were all terrified, at that age any surgery is risky..... however he came through it and lived to the ripe old age of 94.

The surgery went really well, the chemo made him feel rough at the time, he lost a lot of weight and hair, but it was not all terrible, and he got through and and it meant he got to see me get married (twice) find out he was about to be a great grandad - sadly never saw him - and had another 15+ years of life much of it cancer free.
I would say be with him when he sees the consultants as in my grandads case at least the shock meant he did not take it all in, and just support your dad as much as you can and hope he takes the docs advice.

thanks for your reply Mike.
 
Soldato
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Really sorry to hear this and really feel for you and especially your Dad. Having been through something similar all I can say is try and stay as positive as possible, it's the only thing you can really have any kind of control over. Also talk it through with family close friends, don't bottle up those feelings.
 
Soldato
Joined
30 Sep 2005
Posts
16,527
just found out my Dad has got months to live.
spread to his liver etc.
he's such a gentle laid back man (74) and
he is very upset and shocked.

love you dad x

Really sorry to hear this. Don't want to give false hope, but they aren't always right.....and these 'months to live' can turn into years. Just hope that the meds can hold it off for as long as possible.

My Mrs dad went into Nottingham hospital last week for another scan (the one where they put the camera down your throat)....they did find a mass so have sent it off for tests. He's well into his 80s.

Worrying times....it's one of those things where you feel totally helpless. There really isn't anything you can do health wise, so just be there for him and mum.
 
Soldato
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TheWirral
thanks guys.
i'm a very logical person and i accept
my parents wont live for ever but
what got me was when he walked through the door
and he was crying and saying he only has months to live
and that he wants to give me his car.
he doesnt deserve this (no one does ) but if i could swap with him and take this death for him i would do it instantly.

thanks again for all the support.
 
Associate
Joined
7 Oct 2011
Posts
24
Location
Peterborough
just a progression of my other thread really:

https://forums.overclockers.co.uk/threads/stomach-ulcer.18850421/

TLDR: my dad (74) was diagnosed with stomach cancer last week
In it's early stages (described as evidence of cancers cells around the ulcer) and has not spread.
find out treatment options soon.

I know I'm not the only person to be effected by this disease (cancer).
I think I'm sort of in the limbo stages at the moment as we are yet to hear
treatment options.
Part of me feels sad for my dad, another part feels angry and another part of me
has accepted that he may not make this journey and i need to get used to this idea.

I was just curious if anyone else had gone through these stages, whether you was ill yourself
or a family member.
I'd be interested to hear some personal stories of success and loss and if loss is your story
was it kind of a release of emotions to know the effected person was free of illness/pain.

my dads option will either be surgery to remove part or all of the stomach.
another option would be chemo.
my dad is 74 and i wonder to myself maybe chemo although unpleasant could keep it in check for a few
years instead of major surgery which "may" reduce the quality of the rest of his life.

anyway thanks for listening but would appreciate any replies even if short :)


Hi i would like to say i am so sorry to here about your dad. i really hope the treatment plan they decide on works.
I myself was diagnosed with Hodgkin's lymphoma ( cancer of the blood) that was two years ago. i am in remission now thank god.
chemo is horrible i had treatment called beacop it was a very harsh and nasty i was on that for 6 months. so i sit here and wish you and your family the best.
 
Soldato
Joined
18 Oct 2002
Posts
2,716
Location
Royston, Herts
Hi movingtables, sorry to hear your tragic news. My Dad was taken in just over 10 days ago for what was a suspected heart attack. They gave him heparin to try and thin out any clots which resulted in him having a massive bleed from an undiagnosed stomach ulcer. That put him into ICU (it was that big a bleed) but, during all this, they found that the ulcer was malignant. It's only spread, so far as they can tell, to a single, closely located ;lymph node but we're now in a holding pattern whilst we wait for treatment plan to be formulated. The irony is that, whilst the bleed was very serious, without it the cancer may not have been diagnosed for years - probably too late. When I read your OP it really hit home.
Sorry for your terrible news but I am hoping for a better outcome for my Dad. As you say, I know he's in his late 70s and he won't last forever but he's my Dad, my hero, one of the bedrock figures of my life and it is a hammer blow to realise that that vague event of his passing might actually be far, far closer than I ever anticipated.
Fingers crossed, I guess.
Best wishes to everyone dealing with illness in their family. It's hard, terrible and remorseless. If I can take anything from it it is that I need to love my kids just a little more and live a richer life.
 
Soldato
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Posts
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Location
TheWirral
thank you to all that replied.
although he has morphine the devastating part is watching him in pain laying in bed asking me to hold his hand.
he crushed me last night when he said he'd hope he'll be around to watch the golf open in a couple of months.

my poor gentle dad, why x
 
Soldato
OP
Joined
11 Feb 2004
Posts
3,340
Location
TheWirral
how did other people cope with just getting this news?
one minute i'm coping then i break down.
i don't know what is worse, "knowing" someone is dying or them "just" dying one day.
i'm a 44 year old man and im crying none stop lol .
 
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