I think I was more that she had a crush on my now ex.
Plus every cloud has a silver lining the credit on the flight there has covered most of the New York costs
The OcUK Relationship Counselling and Hugs Thread
- Thread starter mattyprice4004
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Plus every cloud has a silver lining the credit on the flight there has covered most of the New York costs
Soldato
She's a big girl who can make her own choices, focus your concerns on yourself not your ex girlfriend.
Sadly, we live in a disposable society. Nothing has any permanence; especially when it comes to relationships. It's easier to throw away than to make an effort to repair. Like a drug, people chase that initial "spark." And when it's gone, be it after two years or two decades, the relationship inevitably falters. Unless of course, both parties are willing to discuss their feelings and put in a concerted effort to work things out. But that rarely happens, which brings us back to my initial comments.
Communication is key It absolutely is
Id you let this fester, or are in it for the buzz, might as well not bother with relationships
Communication is key but more and more people don't want to listen these days because its so easy now just to be ignorant.
"Yeah, I don't want be with you anymore because I have found someone else" Walk out the door, block from phone, social media etc. You will never get an answer because they don't want to listen.
Agreed. Short attention spans, social media and infinite options I guess
See I agree with the first part but for a different reason. I had it with an ex where I tried several times to say I feel like we are drifting apart, I don't want that and we need to fix it etc. Tried for 18 months saying I'm not happy, are you happy? let's fix us.
I'd get back either a "
" or "stop being silly"
The last attempt something i said was mistaken and he assumed I was ending it. I wasn't but I reached the point where I couldn't carry on, I was really struggling with depression brought on by what was happening, plus stresses with family. I even replied saying I didn't want to end it but what's the point if he won't listen. Didn't get a reply (this was all over text, one of the issues was we weren't talking or seeing each other enough)
Guess that's the trouble with LDRs
I'd get back either a "
" or "stop being silly"The last attempt something i said was mistaken and he assumed I was ending it. I wasn't but I reached the point where I couldn't carry on, I was really struggling with depression brought on by what was happening, plus stresses with family. I even replied saying I didn't want to end it but what's the point if he won't listen. Didn't get a reply (this was all over text, one of the issues was we weren't talking or seeing each other enough)
Guess that's the trouble with LDRs
Soldato
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That would have been my clue.
Really messed up situation, no idea how one processes that. Best of luck to you.
Associate
In fairness, lots of people live in Brighton who are heterosexual.
Sorry to hear re. the situation Sui, the pain is real now, but in time it'll improve and in a way, there's little more you could've done to make it work, which might become a comfort for you.
Soldato
lmao of course, it all makes sense now.
Feeling better about it all today, we’re going to live together for a while as there is enough space for us to be separate. I’ll move out in a few weeks if I feel I’m not making any progress though, just the mortgage makes life difficult.
Think I’ll struggle tomorrow but will take it as it comes
Think I’ll struggle tomorrow but will take it as it comes
Feeling better about it all today, we’re going to live together for a while as there is enough space for us to be separate. I’ll move out in a few weeks if I feel I’m not making any progress though, just the mortgage makes life difficult.
Think I’ll struggle tomorrow but will take it as it comes
Question, she's breaking up with you. So why are you moving out and leaving the house with her?
I wouldn't do that! She made the choice, so she should move out. Maybe with her new lover.
This +1000000. Don't move out of your own home ffs.
Soldato
DO NOT MOVE OUT! Seek legal advice and do your homework before doing anything like that.
I'm 10 years on from a cheating ex and we still have a house neither of us can take on solo or sell (crap terraced house in a crap down). It's in negative equity and just an absolute nightmare. I should have stayed but my mental health was in tatters at the time. I only lived in it 3 years too. She abandoned it years ago and it's been empty since.
Slowly got someone working on it. I've recently left my son's mother so being only 2 bed it'll be fine for me to live in for a while but could have sorted all this year's ago. I really wish I dealt with it at the time, what a burden its been. Seriously take your time and don't give too much of yourself to her now, remember she's made the mug out of you here and you owe her nothing. The relationship is a done deal and needent be looked back on when you're ready to move on just don't keep being the mug (sorry if that sounds harsh, it's not your fault at all I just don't want to see you suffer any more than you need to). Don't be like me basically. I'm a weapons grade mug
I'm 10 years on from a cheating ex and we still have a house neither of us can take on solo or sell (crap terraced house in a crap down). It's in negative equity and just an absolute nightmare. I should have stayed but my mental health was in tatters at the time. I only lived in it 3 years too. She abandoned it years ago and it's been empty since.
Slowly got someone working on it. I've recently left my son's mother so being only 2 bed it'll be fine for me to live in for a while but could have sorted all this year's ago. I really wish I dealt with it at the time, what a burden its been. Seriously take your time and don't give too much of yourself to her now, remember she's made the mug out of you here and you owe her nothing. The relationship is a done deal and needent be looked back on when you're ready to move on just don't keep being the mug (sorry if that sounds harsh, it's not your fault at all I just don't want to see you suffer any more than you need to). Don't be like me basically. I'm a weapons grade mug
I'm not really attached to the house, if I left it would only be to parents for a couple of weeks to get my head straight then come back, moving out long term won't work for me until I have something else sorted.
We had the chat earlier that I'll stay as long as I need to get my life back on track, then we can talk about her buying me out. She said she'll want me out within a month or two if I won't allow this other girl round, well of course I don't want her coming round when you basically formed a relationship with her in the ******* house.
I'll see how it goes, but don't worry, I'm not just going to roll over as I'm not the one who wanted it over.
We had the chat earlier that I'll stay as long as I need to get my life back on track, then we can talk about her buying me out. She said she'll want me out within a month or two if I won't allow this other girl round, well of course I don't want her coming round when you basically formed a relationship with her in the ******* house.
I'll see how it goes, but don't worry, I'm not just going to roll over as I'm not the one who wanted it over.
I told her I'd tell her when I'm ready, and it'll be once I'm happy in my life again and that I couldn't give a time frame on that, in the mean time you'll just have to spend time wherever she ends up living.
Basically I currently don't want to move out and live alone, as Brighton is super expensive. I think in time I might just have to up sticks and move up North
Sorry to hear that Dan.On the plus side, you and the little lad will have a ball together. I hung on to my relationship with Alex's mum for years because I couldn't bear not seeing him.
It wasn't all bad though, I miss him terribly but he loves coming to my house and we have a great time here.