Soldato
- Joined
- 7 Aug 2004
- Posts
- 10,993
Both self isolate for 14 days, make sure both all clear, then you go isolate at her house or she yours?
I don't see the issue with that tbh, sensible approach.
The OcUK Relationship Counselling and Hugs Thread
- Thread starter mattyprice4004
- Start date
Both self isolate for 14 days, make sure both all clear, then you go isolate at her house or she yours?
I don't see the issue with that tbh, sensible approach.
She'll be wanting a kid next. A puppy is just the first step towards that.
Although that solves the issue of a dog alone during the day (get a cat flap) it can still be expensive. I had to take my cat to the vets last week after she got into a fight with another animal. £330 later the cat hates me.
Soldato
What if one of you is an asymptomatic carrier and the other gets ill? It's a nightmare.
Soldato
We've just decided to keep apart from each other for the time being. I share a house with my sister who is a nurse and will be working in the Nightingale hospital here in Belfast so if she brings anything back, I'd rather not pass it onto anyone, including my girlfriend. Not sure what the PSNI are like but I doubt I'd get to my girlfriend's house without being stopped.
So far things have been good. We would video chat a few times a week and even had a virtual date the other night watching Murder Mystery on Netflix. She currently lives alone, although with two dogs for company but it is still lonely for her.
Ok, Let me break a few things down.
Why are you letting her dictate this to you?!!?
Exactly, getting a dog right now is just another bill, an UNNECESSARY bill too. Especially now you just moved into a new place
Your counter should have been "If you really want a dog, then YOU can pay for it and YOU can look after it...NOT ME AND DON'T EXPECT ME TO EITHER!" Then see how she reacts.
No, you are not being the bad guy, you are using your head and being realistic.
What's with women and wanting dogs these days?!?!!? When really a dog is just a substitute child to them. They rather have a baby but a dog is easier so they start pushing for it. When you know, its not a good idea but a woman's decisions are largely emotional, not logical.
I have see this so many times with my friends, they move into together. Get a dog, its all good until the women falls pregnant then she wants to get rid of the dog because "its too much with the baby". Yet, getting a dog was her idea in the first place.
Stand your ground RobDogDog!
Very Very bad advice. It's as if you have no idea how woman think. oh dear
The danger is that if he doesn't push back now, then her making unilateral decisions will become the norm. I long ago learned that the easy way of just giving in to the small issues creates bigger problems long term. But it does risk the relationship early on.
I'm not a woman so of course I don't know how they think
But no, its not bad advice, you need to put boundaries in place so they don't go and do stupid things which end up screwing you both over. If you don't, then don't complain when they do something else and it escalates into something bigger you disagree with.
I learnt that lesson a few years ago.
If she respects you then it wont, if she doesn't then you know she wasn't the right one. Weeds out all the trouble makers if you nip it in the bud early on.
Rude, how?
Its got nothing to do with partnership, its about thinking what you are doing first before making rash decisions. Especially when times are tough as it is.
Soldato
You're getting the guys girlfriend confused for a dog.
...which appears to be exactly what his GF has done by unilaterally declaring they are both getting a dog and just expecting it without bringing him into the discussion first (assuming that's the case based on what the OP said). Yes she is being rude if this is the full story.
This really, as it sounds like you'd be out for all hours of the day. I don't think a dog walker will look after them for the majority of the day, which means the poor thing would be left on their own.
I'm sure they've not been the only one to think that way.
Soldato
Calm down, she was thinking with her heart not her head. Most people do it from time to time. Next you'll be suggesting he dump her.
I could be wrong but @Diagro put in bold:
Your counter should have been "If you really want a dog, then YOU can pay for it and YOU can look after it...NOT ME AND DON'T EXPECT ME TO EITHER!" Then see how she reacts.
From your original post @malachi so I think that's probably the bit referred to as bad advice.
Like I said, could be wrong but it is bad advice because what would then stop her going out and getting a dog. Plus, as someone else mentioned, you're not working as a partnership.
Anyway, from @RobDogDog's latest post it's all sorted now
/case closed
Your counter should have been "If you really want a dog, then YOU can pay for it and YOU can look after it...NOT ME AND DON'T EXPECT ME TO EITHER!" Then see how she reacts.
From your original post @malachi so I think that's probably the bit referred to as bad advice.
Like I said, could be wrong but it is bad advice because what would then stop her going out and getting a dog. Plus, as someone else mentioned, you're not working as a partnership.
Anyway, from @RobDogDog's latest post it's all sorted now
/case closed
I got a message from an unknown number the other day. Turned out to be my ex, whose number and Facebook I blocked almost two years back. I'm not in a great place with my mental health at the moment; I'm a med student. I've spent the last two and a half years trying my utmost to forget about her. The message she sent me, combined with learning from a mutual friend that the person she left me for has dumped her and she is begging him to return, is doing my ******* head in. Ugh, just wish I could get away from it all. /rant.
Reblock and move on
She actively got a new number to contact you? What did it say?
Sounds like poison to me. Just focus on the future. Focus on that career and course
and keep going with hobbies!