Is the auto kingdom management any good in this, or will I miss quests & loot if I use it? I've just started with it in manual and I seem to be spending all my time fumbling around trying to get events etc. to be successful and I'd rather focus on the rpg side of the game, I'm not really into management games.
I've never used it so not sure you still get the interactions with visitors to your kingdom. These can lead to other quests and loot.
Maybe it just decides which kingdom task you are doing and places upgrade buildings for you?
There are a fair amount of events to go through, sometimes it feels like you are constantly doing that but its only the main quest of that chapter you need to keep an eye on, it should tell you how many days you have remaining. I think the Stag Lord has 80 days or so and you can run through it in 4 days.
Some events you will fail, I'm not convinced they are random.
Your party member with the highest perception will help you spot locations when you travel the map, these can trigger side quests when you visit them.