So I need some help with this statement please (really bad enlish).

Soldato
Joined
25 Mar 2005
Posts
5,043
Hello everybody,
I need some help with my poor english.

Basically I need to write to Direct Line what happened about 10 months ago. (Even though I told them what happened just after the accident had occurred).

Your help will be to make sense from what I wrote here :) (correct all the mistakes).

Please and thank you for any help.


It’s a short story.


I was driving along the middle lane King Street in Hammersmith towards Hammersmith Broadway. I stopped my car just before the zebra crossing when the red light lit. However the bus driving next to my right side of the car kept driving and then left rear side of the bus hit my car causing damage to my cars front wheel, mirror and some body damage. At the time of the accident my car was static. The accident occurred 07/09/2005 at about 1p.m.


Well what I can tell you more is that that time there was really a lot of traffic and all cars were moving really slowly. And I’m not saying that the bus drove when there was red light, it could have been still yellow, but I stopped my car anyway (you know how people drive when there a lot of traffic around).

I did call police that time as well, didn’t know what to do with my car in the middle of a very busy road, as it was not drivable that time.



I know this has a lot of grammar mistakes that’s why I need your help to make sense of it.

Here is a diagram I quickly just made.




So if you kindly rewrite it so it make sense please.
Thank you for all the help.
 
Soldato
Joined
31 May 2005
Posts
6,847
Location
Peoples Republik of Teesside
How about

I was driving in the middle lane of King Street in Hammersmith towards Hammersmith Broadway. I stopped my car at the zebra crossing when the traffic lights began to change. However the bus driving in the lane to my right kept going. The bus then entered into my lane and it's rear nearside hit the front offside of my car. My car sustained damage to the front offside wheel, mirror and bodywork. I called the police as my car was in the middle of a very busy road and it was not drivable.

At the time of the incident my car was static.

The accident occurred 07/09/2005 at around 1p.m.
 
Soldato
Joined
25 Nov 2004
Posts
4,788
Location
Hertfordshire
Cybermyk said:
How about

I was driving in the middle lane of King Street in Hammersmith towards Hammersmith Broadway. I stopped my car at the zebra crossing when the traffic lights began to change. However the bus driving in the lane to my right kept going. The bus then entered into my lane and it's rear nearside hit the front offside of my car. My car sustained damage to the front offside wheel, mirror and bodywork. I called the police as my car was in the middle of a very busy road and it was not drivable.

At the time of the incident my car was static.

The accident occurred 07/09/2005 at around 1p.m.


Above looks fine to me.

If I was being picky I'd say it has a lot of short sentences lol.

I'd probably stay "stationary" rather than static though

/pedantic :)
 
Soldato
Joined
14 Apr 2003
Posts
4,951
Location
Deepest Yorkshire
Cybermyk said:
How about

I was driving in the middle lane of King Street in Hammersmith towards Hammersmith Broadway. I stopped my car at the zebra crossing when the traffic lights began to change. However the bus driving in the lane to my right kept going. The bus then entered into my lane and it's rear nearside hit the front offside of my car. My car sustained damage to the front offside wheel, mirror and bodywork. I called the police as my car was in the middle of a very busy road and it was not drivable.

At the time of the incident my car was static.

The accident occurred 07/09/2005 at around 1p.m.

Wouldn't it be the nearside?
 
Back
Top Bottom