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I’d have to agree with that sentiment. I’m not disbelieving the OP, but I suspect the story was told more for comic effect than a statement of genuine fact. Of course, I realise that medical reasons or advanced age might lead to some loss of control, and that’s not amusing, but outside of those...

The closest I’ve ever come to wetting myself was on the way to a football match at Fulham. I was on the district line tube with some mates and I was absolutely dying for a slash but I kept convincing myself that I could last out until we got off, despite the pressure building to an intolerable...

Love re-reading this thread when I fancy a laugh. Is it wrong of me to want to know how your mum knew he’d deposited white long johns in the carrier bag?!

I got on a bus years ago and saw who I thought was a mate sitting in the front seat on the upper deck. He had jet black hair that always looked a bit oily and we used to take the pee somewhat. I walked to the back of him, rubbed my hand through his hair, right across his scalp and said loudly...

Never pooed myself in adulthood but I did come incredibly close to wetting myself a few years ago on the way to a match at Fulham after some pre-game drinks. I was in agony on the tube train and I had to get off at Parsons Green station because I seriously thought I was going to have an accident...

I'm not sure about the eye-shutting business but I drove coaches for some years and did football trips, pub-crawls, stag-nights and trips to the races (the worst!). I can't tell you how many times I had guys wailing, yes literally, that they were about to wet themselves if I didn't stop within...

I know someone said they suffer from sweaty feet but that's a bit extreme!!

The perfect explanation, thanks! I just wondered as I've seen it twice within a few weeks.

I love getting the answer to odd, quirky things. If there are any firefighters on here, why do you sometimes see a fire engine full of firefighters, with a pair of shoes perched on the dashboard behind the windscreen? I've seen that a couple of times and wonder why?

Definately! :D

Okay I will bite this time. Of course there are people who have far, far worse days, incredibly appalling. We all know and don't dispute that fact. Look, I made the original post and it was meant to be light-hearted. The bloke told the story, having a real laugh at his own expense, when he was...

I think I may have misled with the original post. The subject Reece was the best man and the story-teller. He told it about himself! Very funny guy the way he told it.

Alright, maybe this loses it's style a bit when relayed second-hand but if you think you've had a bad day, read on... Last weekend I was at a wedding and I heard the most comical story ever about Aston Villa’s recent play-off final day. I can’t recreate the way it was told so it may not sound...

Oh sorry, ignore that one then. But has anyone else seen the little inch-square pads that act as sweat-absorbers in shoes?

Do people actually ask visitors to take their shoes off in your house?

How do people keep their shoes cool when the weather is as hot as this? I sometimes feel for sales reps, home visitors etc who feel obliged or are asked to remove their shoes in people's homes when the temperatures are so high. A few months back I had a valuation on my house and the young bloke...

Reading this thread is amusing: "Of course you can wait two and a half hours" "Most people go four hours without using the loo" "Easy to hold on for three hours" "Simple, don't drink before the parade" "just empty your bladder before you go out" If only they were robots! Surely the guardsmen...

Ah lol. Maybe fainting is sometimes a cover, eh.

This is a bit cheeky but where could you slip off to if you were in trouble? I've never seen anyone in uniform in a queue at the public loos! I wouldn't have thought there was a hope of leaving your post during a parade.

That can't be serious.