Being a Dad for the 1st time
- Thread starter digipeep
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Soldato
I don't think 40 is too late but you will miss a great deal of your daughter/son(s) life as you will be getting older ...ahhh life!
The gf(30) and i(29) have been trying for 3 yrs now and gone through 3x miscarriage. We are undergoing tests n whatnot atm but still its a struggle for her every time she sees a baby & thinks our son/daughter would have been 1yr now....
It's depressing sometimes BUT one day it will happen!
The gf(30) and i(29) have been trying for 3 yrs now and gone through 3x miscarriage. We are undergoing tests n whatnot atm but still its a struggle for her every time she sees a baby & thinks our son/daughter would have been 1yr now....
It's depressing sometimes BUT one day it will happen!
Get every bit of sleep you can now! My son is the best thing thats ever happened to me but I haven't slept in 14 months... I'm not joking! Doesn't matter that he sleeps in almost every night now.
Its all the stuff that you used to be able to get done during the day that you now have to do at 10pm, when you're knackered.
Its a total change in the way your brain is programmed, you aren't the same person you are before. Nobody who hasn't had kids will understand.
If you're going to have one then you'll love it, but seriously, sleep now - you will never sleep again!
Its all the stuff that you used to be able to get done during the day that you now have to do at 10pm, when you're knackered.
Its a total change in the way your brain is programmed, you aren't the same person you are before. Nobody who hasn't had kids will understand.
If you're going to have one then you'll love it, but seriously, sleep now - you will never sleep again!
![[TW]Fox](/data/man-of-honor/2009.png){kind=avatar}
Unlike your parents Foxey, most people don't pay for their kids to go to university
I paid my own University fees thanks, odd comment to make
The University loan/grant system is geared up to the assumption though that parents pay for it - which is why the amount you get is related to how much your parents earn. Why else would this be the case if parents were not expected by the government to fund it?
Soldato
Absolute rubbish!
My wife and I are in our 30's and have been together for 15 years now. We've said right from the start that neither of us wanted children. We considered many things, ranging from our finances to the world we'd be bringing a child up in. It's a choice we've both made and are very happy with it!
Perhaps in your eyes we are being selfish in saying we'd rather afford a nice house, two cars, two holidays a year and a more comfortable lifestyle as opposed to the financial sacrifices we'd have to make should we become parents? Of course we have friends who have had children and I genuinely wish them all the best in bringing up their offspring as they best see fit
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Associate
Sleep is the thing you will need, mine is 2 next month and he still wakes at 5am and wants to play!!! I think at 37 1 is enough for us. Get sky tv and lots of toys and you be sorted hopefully
Associate
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i'd hate to get to old age and then wish i'd had children when i had the chance
it must be a horrible thing to grow old and die with no-one to be with or to know that your bloodline is effectively ended
i think a lot of these "never have kids" types will face a big old reality check when they're old and decrepit
it must be a horrible thing to grow old and die with no-one to be with or to know that your bloodline is effectively ended
i think a lot of these "never have kids" types will face a big old reality check when they're old and decrepit
Actually I would say deciding to end a family bloodline on those reasons is very selfish.
The world you bring your child up in, is as only as bad as you make it. As for finances, you must be on quite a low wage if you couldn't afford to go on holiday with a child.
But that's strictly my opinion on it, I'm not saying you are in the wrong
then again, one of you can easily change your mind in the future, you might say now it will never happen, but there is some thing out there that will make you or the missus crack one day. I hope for your sake it's not too late if/when that happens.
[TW]Fox;18501715 said:I paid my own University fees thanks, odd comment to make
The University loan/grant system is geared up to the assumption though that parents pay for it - which is why the amount you get is related to how much your parents earn. Why else would this be the case if parents were not expected by the government to fund it?
Your comment suggested otherwise!
The Government may "expect" parents to contribute, but surely this is simply a way to reduce the overall bill? Regardless of what might be assumed, most people don't pay to put their children through University, so I wouldn't suggest it should be a concern for someone having a child in their 40s.
Absolute rubbish!
My wife and I are in our 30's and have been together for 15 years now. We've said right from the start that neither of us wanted children. We considered many things, ranging from our finances to the world we'd be bringing a child up in. It's a choice we've both made and are very happy with it!
Perhaps in your eyes we are being selfish in saying we'd rather afford a nice house, two cars, two holidays a year and a more comfortable lifestyle as opposed to the financial sacrifices we'd have to make should we become parents? Of course we have friends who have had children and I genuinely wish them all the best in bringing up their offspring as they best see fit
I feel a bit sorry for you - putting material things above having children. I'm sure you can justify it to yourselves, but when all is said and done, your own bloodlines will die out with you.
He'll be dead, so he wont have an awful lot of time to be that concerned about his 'bloodline' dying.
Soldato
i dont get the 'not having kids is selfish' thing. Do some people really think un-conceived children have a right to be born? that's completely backward!
Was 31 when we had our first, she is 13 weeks now, started trying at 30 as i felt it was getting a bit late for kids, for me i think 35 is my upper end for a first child, 40 i would think was too old for me but its fine for others. It is very demanding, those that havent had kids wont realise just how much, its not even the lack of sleep its just the shear amount of your life they take up.
I also think it's a bit weird wanting to have material things over children :/
Can understand when people decide because of over-population or because they are not fit to raise a child, if there is a chance of illness and so on. But not because they rather have a nice car
Can understand when people decide because of over-population or because they are not fit to raise a child, if there is a chance of illness and so on. But not because they rather have a nice car
Soldato
I was 42 when my daughter was born. Best thing that has ever happened in my life. I am now nearly 47.
I'm 37 and currently in two minds about children.
One side thinks that I will be to old yet, I want to keep the family name alive.
The missus, says that she wants kids when everything becomes stable monetary wise. Which in our case could a good few years off
One side thinks that I will be to old yet, I want to keep the family name alive.
The missus, says that she wants kids when everything becomes stable monetary wise. Which in our case could a good few years off