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Currently being held prisoner in hospital...

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by scratch, Jan 11, 2019.

  1. scratch


    Joined: Oct 18, 2002

    Posts: 4,137

    Location: Southampton

    Afternoon all,

    Our 11 month-old started nursery this week and on Tuesday came home with a small red mark on the back of her leg. We thought nothing of it and carried on as normal, as you do.

    Wednesday she came home and the red mark had developed into a bruise and on further investigation we found a total of 5 small bruises on her body. She’s non-mobile at the moment and the location of the bruises are in areas which wouldn’t be easily accessible while she’s sat.

    Yesterday my partner went into the nursery to have an informal chat with the manager about it..she’s was completely calm and made no accusations, we just wanted to flag it as a concern. We left it that they’d investigate and get back to us.

    Wind forward to 5pm and we get a call from the regional manager telling us they have to report it to the local authority and to wait for. Then just as we’re putting our daughter to sleep, Social Services call and tell us we have to take our daughter to A&E to get her checked out! Basically nobody at the nursery is admitting fault which means we’re just as much in the frame as the nursery are.

    So we’re on a paediatric ward and have been since 7:30ish last night and we’re not actually allowed to leave with our daughter until Social Services say so! They’ve performed blood tests, they’ve done a CT scan and she’s due to have a full set of skeletal xrays (25 of them!!) but they can’t do these until Monday now. They’re waiting on a call back from SS, but they close at 5pm!! There is no way we’re staying another night!!

    As much as we’re impressed that the “system” is taking things so seriously, we can’t help but feel that things are being taken to the extreme. My partner has worked in childcare for donkeys years and has been on the other side of these investigations many times, but has never seen this kind of reaction from SS.

    There is no way we’re staying in here all weekend, but if we don’t then we risk being visited by the police and having our daughter removed from our care! All because somebody else has caused harm to our baby girl :(
  2. Droolinggimp


    Joined: May 16, 2004

    Posts: 3,470

    Location: Derby

    Sorry to hear all that. I hope it's resolved asap. I can't imagine what you're all going through. I guess SS are being thorough. I hope it's not a case of being accused guilty before all investigations are finalised.
  3. new boy


    Joined: Jun 25, 2009

    Posts: 3,171

    Location: Weston-super-Mare

    Wow, that's quite a situation.

    I don't know how I feel about how its been handled, its probably over the top, but I guess that's better than them not doing enough. I can see why they are doing what they are doing.

    25 x-rays sounds very excessive to me...

    I'm sorry you have to go through this.
  4. Dyson


    Joined: Jan 18, 2007

    Posts: 4,163

    Location: Dorset

    Sounds awful for you all, I hope you get it all sorted, and find the person hurting your baby girl.

    Although it seems an extreme reaction by SS, it’s good to see it not being ignored
  5. stokecity_m

    Wise Guy

    Joined: Mar 31, 2009

    Posts: 2,168

    Location: Stoke-on-trent

    This has to be one of my worst nightmares and I can't imagine the stress you're going though.

    I'd be looking to speak to a family lawer right away to see you rights etc.
  6. snips86x


    Joined: Nov 14, 2012

    Posts: 15,524

    Location: Wiltshire

    I don't really know what to say to that, it seems like quite alot of information to take in (being a parent myself, I can see how this is concerning). Have you had a 2nd opinion as to what might have caused the marks and bruising?

    What about online checks for the nursery? Has anyone else reported it before to either the council or ofsted?
  7. Maccapacca


    Joined: Apr 13, 2010

    Posts: 16,130

    Location: Sunny Sussex

    Can they do that? I doubt they can. They can ask I suppose but they can't stop you going home. It's a service not a force.
  8. Slam62


    Joined: Jan 3, 2006

    Posts: 7,192

    Location: Monaco

    Society now throws a lot of suspicion on parents, probably because of a few high profile cases.

    Also a few people who must never have had kids creating the rules.

    Anyway, sounds like a pain in the neck to me, I hope they are properly investigating the play group. The trouble is they can afford more on lawyers fees than you.

    It also discourages you from reporting anything and you'll probably just move your girl to another group and some other kid could suffer.
  9. snips86x


    Joined: Nov 14, 2012

    Posts: 15,524

    Location: Wiltshire

    As a parent, its your worst nightmare. Being told you cannot leave and living in fear of what's to come :(
  10. Maccapacca


    Joined: Apr 13, 2010

    Posts: 16,130

    Location: Sunny Sussex

    It's only words. I know what I'd do.
  11. G-MAN2004


    Joined: Jul 4, 2004

    Posts: 29,369

    I'd probably end up in proper prison if I found out who had been hurting my baby.

    Sorry to hear dude. Hope it's sorted quickly.
  12. NoobCannon


    Joined: Jun 13, 2011

    Posts: 4,303

    i feel your pain, my kids old nursery drove me insane, my little girl fell over at home. We told the nursery the next day why she had a bump on a her head and filled out the form to say what happend etc so they knew.
    and STILL we had to go to the hospital and be interviewed etc etc etc and it was all because she had some bruises on her legs aswell, i tried asking them if they had ever met a 4 year old before and do they understand that kids fall over and get bumps and scrapes etc its part of life but they chose to question our parenting ability for 3 hours instead.

    glad shes started school now and i never have to see those fools again.
  13. Azza


    Joined: Dec 6, 2005

    Posts: 34,318

    Location: Birmingham

    I'm no parent, but the nursery has a duty of care, surely they would have noticed the bruising if it's in an easily visible place? Don't most have a form or something so parents can advice of any known bruises or marks etc? Do they keep records of any incidents or events that have occurred? Maybe you child was knocked or fallen over while there? If that was seen don't they have to record it and inform the parent(s), usually you then have to sign a form to acknowledge the event?

    25 x-rays sounds ridiculous though. x-ray = broken bone? broken bone = child crying nonstop?

    Social services would be able to inform the hospital to refuse discharge I imagine.
  14. cheesyboy


    Joined: Dec 7, 2012

    Posts: 10,998

    Location: Gloucestershire

    It's no fun, but it's good that SS take potential abuse seriously. We've all seen the cases where they fail to act, or tread too lightly.

    My 5.5 year old has broken her arm twice, so i kind of expected some SS contact, but nothing came up.
  15. Hades


    Joined: Oct 19, 2002

    Posts: 21,928

    Location: Surrey and London

    Sorry to hear it. I got all sorts of questions asked when I took my daughter to hospital wirh a dislocated arm and that's trivial compared to this.
  16. Uther


    Joined: Jun 16, 2005

    Posts: 9,110

    Good that the SS are taking it seriously, not so good when you're caught up in it. As for leaving when they have told you not to, is it possible that will only inflame the situation and you might get them turning up at your door with the police...
  17. crinkleshoes


    Joined: Jun 9, 2009

    Posts: 11,605

    Location: London, McLaren or Radical

    25 X-rays sounds like a dangerous amount of radiation to expose an 11 month old to in 1 day... I'd be getting an external expert opinion about that from a consultant who knows what he's on about
  18. dowie


    Joined: Jan 29, 2008

    Posts: 38,528

    Sorry to hear that, must completely suck, especially if someone at the nursery has screwed up and caused you this grief.

    I guess the procedures are there for good reason though, it isn't like the medical staff at the hospital can know who was responsible for the injuries (if anyone) and so I guess I can see why it is right from their pov that they'd want social services to clear it.
  19. dowie


    Joined: Jan 29, 2008

    Posts: 38,528

    I dunno, it is probably a phone call to the police if those words are ignored and potentially more grief.
  20. Roar87


    Joined: May 10, 2012

    Posts: 4,906

    Location: Leeds

    I'd always just escalate if I've done nothing wrong, you shouldn't need to feel guilty and be treated like a criminal if you're innocent. So what if the Police come round? What are they going to do? If the parents haven't done anything wrong and in fact were the people to first raise concerns then they have nothing to worry about.