Do you have seperate money from your wife?

[LiE]

Looking for some real life experience from those of you who have separate money from your wife. Currently all our money goes into 1 pot, and we spend from the same joint account. We recently talked about the possibility of each having our own money, allowing us to buy things without worrying if it will impact the other.

How do you guys find paying for things like meals, trips, etc? Do you take it in turns or do they owe the money? Curious how it works for a lot of people.

 

[Colbaker]

Both our wages go into the same pot, everything paid out of this pot.

Never had any issues and we have been doing this for 10 years.

 

[ColdAsIce]

Joint account with my girlfriend of 3 years. Which might be a step to far for some couples.

Certainly anyone in marriage should have a joint account. I cannot understand the selfish thinking of requiring a separate account. My brother is married for over 10 years with 2 kids and I cringe when hear him and my sister-law come out with comments like.

Richard bought Michael's holiday clothes so I bought our daughters holiday clothes.

Or Richard paid for the holiday so I will pay for part of Christmas O_o

 

[Zero Pope]

I have seperate money, the only joint money we have is in the house account for bills, everything else is our own. For going out, it's usually whoever suggests the place that pays and seeing as we take it in turns to pick somewhere then it's fairly balanced. We don't owe each other anything as we don't lend or borrow, we give. From my experience of keeping tabs on who has paid what in a relationship can cause problems if one pays more than the other on a regular basis.

 

[MooMoo444]

Seperate accounts works fine, just remember the #1 rule.

Whats hers is hers, and whats yours is hers.

 

[Raumarik]

Our wages go into our own back account, we put a minimum each month into a joint account which pays for most bills. We do discuss money regularly though but to be fair any money we have is jointly owned, it's simply a nice neat way of doing things.

Meals, trips etc are paid for by whoever has cash on them or whoever gets handed the bill.

Need to talk about money regularly though and check the joint account is healthy every week or so to ensure that everything ticks along smoothly.

 

[Musty Pie]

Seperate accounts works fine, just remember the #1 rule.

Whats hers is hers, and whats yours is hers.

Never a truer word spoken!

 

[ci_newman]

Both our wages go into the same pot, everything paid out of this pot.

Never had any issues and we have been doing this for 10 years.

We do the same If a man and wife cannot share their wealth without abusing the trust of the other, then there is something wrong with that relationship

 

[deuse]

Seperate accounts works fine, just remember the #1 rule.

Whats hers is hers, and whats yours is hers.

+2

 

[Malt_Vinegar]

My Mrs (engaged) and I have our own current accounts. I also have a second account which I transfer an amount into monthly to cover living costs, which we pretty much split down the middle.. For example, I do electricity, she does council tax, I do Phone/internet, she does TV, etc.
So, my shared costs go into my second account.
I then have my current account with my "own money" in it, and she has her own current and savings account.
We take it in turns to pay for things generally, although we don't really keep track, its just a quick "is it my turn?" and then we decide who pays for what.
Generally, I pay for meals out, but then we split things like cinema. She will buy tickets, and I buy the food.
We use each others cars too sometimes, and if we get to empty we fill them up, even though mine costs a lot more that hers to fill, and does less miles! However, we do all long trips in my car so I absorb those petrol costs.

In all honesty, we just bumble along and dont really think about it. We may join up in the future, as it really will make no difference in the long run. But I think we will always have some form of our own savings for our own treats

 

[Witor]

Joint account for the past 9-10 years also. Never had any worries either, though both of us are relatively sensible with our money.

Can be a bit difficult if you're trying to hide something (in a good way, mini-breaks, xmas, etc), but there's ways around that, i.e draw out more than needed at a cashpoint, etc.

 

[Lysander]

Separate accounts always. My parents had a joint account and it really screwed things up in the long run.

 

[LiE]

Yea that's my concern ColdAsIce. There are no problems with our joint spending/accounts, it's been fine for 5 years. There are a lot of times when either of us would like to buy something nice, but don't want to drain the joint funds too much. Also, buying gifts is a little weird for each other from a joint account.

 

[Cosimo]

Separate bank accounts for the day to day stuff and joint accounts for savings.

 

[LiE]

Separate bank accounts for the day to day stuff and joint accounts for savings.

That's what I'm thinking.

I'm not proposing that we have a joint account which we both pay a % into, I earn too much compared to my wife for that to be fair. We currently combine our income, pay for all the bills/savings/big purchases, then the remained goes into the joint spending account.

What I am proposing is taking what we normally put into a joint spending account and splitting it 50/50 into separate accounts. For example, if we had £500 in a joint spending account, we would both have £250 separately.

So this is purely for luxury money, everything else is paid jointly i.e. cars, savings, bills.

 

[Musty Pie]

Separate bank accounts for the day to day stuff and joint accounts for savings.

This is actually what we do. Although she takes more out of savings then I do ...

 

[[Damien]]

I'm not married (in a relationship though) but I definitely think both parties in a relationship need their own financial independence.

I'm all for a joint bank account to simplify bills, food etc but if I want to spend my own money on faberge eggs and pictures of Jeremy Clarkson's left ear, that's my business and no one elses. So long as I pay my bills and support my family, what I do with the rest is irrelevant.

If/when I do sort out a joint bank account for me and my partner, we'll both set up a transfer amount into it to cover our halves of bills and other costs, and the rest of each other's wage stays put in our own accounts

If nothing else it avoids the 'where's all the cash gone? You spent how much on what?!' situations if all the serious money is kept separate from our own hookers and blow money.

 

[Spuj]

The GF and I have a joint account which we use to pay for rent (will become mortgage eventually), all the bills related to the flat and our weekly food shop. We pay the same amount into this account. We then have seperate accounts for personal spending and savings.

 

[krooton]

My gf and I have separate accounts at the moment, mainly due to us not being allowed a joint as I am busy clearing an IVA.

Once that is done next year, we will set up a joint account for joint thing like house and grocery expenses (which will be a weighted percentage based on what we each earn), and any leftover we keep in our individual accounts, so she can spend money on her horse, and I can spend money on my computer. This also mean I can save up for special things without her knowledge.

 

[kefkef]

Seperate bank accounts which the wages go into. Then we have each agreed an amount we pay into a joint account that covers all bills, holiday funds and savings, leaving us each with our own money in our accounts to spend on what we like.