Funeral goes badly

Deleted member 651465 · 8 Mar 2019 at 19:01

Probably wouldn’t have been so bad if you hadn’t proclaimed that you didn’t want to go prior to the funeral.

The fact you made it a deal, then walked out of the wake only screams of “I didn’t want to be there”.

How she will forgive you given that it’s her father is anyone’s guess. Good luck

sanaxe1 · 8 Mar 2019 at 19:05

The only way you can recover from this is to kill her dad so you can have a do over but for god's sake man. DO NOT LEAVE HER THIS TIME!

413x · 8 Mar 2019 at 19:09

Roar87 said:
Again though, he was at the funeral and sat with his partner and supported her. The wake is a social gathering following the funeral, why stay at a social gathering where you aren't welcome?

Still for me it comes down to that this event was for her.
But maybe that's just me

Vita · 8 Mar 2019 at 19:14

I’d have stayed just out of respect for her father, and to comfort your missus.

People are awkward, you just have to deal with it.

[FnG]magnolia · 8 Mar 2019 at 21:45

ALL OF GD: This was her dad who died and you were supposed to be there to support your partner. You've messed up there.

ROAR87: Nah, you're golden dude. Do your own thing, it's all about you :cool:

ElliorR · 8 Mar 2019 at 22:00

Women who are sad and ****** off at their husbands looking for ways to hit back. Tell her I’m on my way round.

LeeUK · 8 Mar 2019 at 22:01

If it was your partners long lost extended family member's cousin who you did not know then you could have swerved it and not gone to the funeral. But when it is your Mrs father then you should have stayed there in your duty even if you didn't want to be there.

Also the do after a funeral is a funeral reception. A wake is a gathering before the funeral to say your last respects to the deceased, usually around the coffin. Don't know why everyone gets this mixed up.

ethan · 8 Mar 2019 at 22:08

LeeUK said:
If it was your partners long lost extended family member's cousin who you did not know then you could have swerved it and not gone to the funeral. But when it is your Mrs father then you should have stayed there in your duty even if you didn't want to be there.

Also the do after a funeral is a funeral reception. A wake is a gathering before the funeral to say your last respects to the deceased, usually around the coffin. Don't know why everyone gets this mixed up.

I stayed at the funeral. It's the reception I left after about thirty minutes.

Scania · 8 Mar 2019 at 22:11

ethan said:
I stayed at the funeral. It's the reception I left after about thirty minutes.

And because the funeral was over your wife no longer needed your support?

You just don’t seem to get it mate.

darael · 8 Mar 2019 at 22:14

Personally I would have stuck it out and made a small effort to speak with others.

ethan · 8 Mar 2019 at 22:22

I did try. I stayed thirty minutes longer than I wanted and which had previously been agreed (by the Mrs). On some of the occasions, it took three attempts to get an answer or handshake from her family members when trying to engage. At one point I found myself seated with her family members who ignored me, whilst my family was situated on a table further down. I'd previously mentioned to one of my family that it was weird that we were being ignored. It since transpired that the Mrs had annoyed her sister by arriving late (which I didn't know anything about) so there was some tension there.

Roland Butter · 8 Mar 2019 at 23:04

This is crying out for a poll.

As usual the remainers are making the most noise , but the leavers are gaining ground and the undecided are just......just.......******* wishy washy
fence sitting, "oh I don't really know", surrender monkeys, make your mind up FFS, it's hardly astro-physics.

LeeUK · 8 Mar 2019 at 23:17

TBH I can't be bothered with drinking after a funeral, especially ones that happen in the morning and they expect you do go to some back street boozer somewhere and drink all afternoon. Usually stop for one and show my face before leaving.

TNGL · 8 Mar 2019 at 23:29

Under the assumption they have no good reason to dislike you (this is a big assumption), I am a part of the minority that agrees with you leaving. They obviously didn't want you there and your wife has all of her family to support her and each other anyway. Besides this, your presence may have been making the wake an even more miserable experience for them anyway and so you could well have been doing everybody (but your wife) a favour by leaving.

What matters is you attended the funeral. It was a bonus for you to attend the wake but unfortunately, it didn't go as well as it could have.

If I were you, I'd offer your wife an apology just to save yourself the headache of remaining in her bad books for too long but it doesn't necessarily have to be sincere.

Funeral goes badly

Deleted member 651465

Deleted member 651465