How's this done ?

Stick up the image you're talking about so we can have a go. That image is pin sharp and if you're processing an image that isn't, then you're never going to achieve the same effect, obviously.
 
Well the thing that stands out about the image in the OP is the detail, contrast and sharpening. The technique looks great on guys - chiseled and rough - but I'm not sure it's really going to suit the gf there.

The image you're using there is pretty washed out in the first place and lacks the detail to do something comparable anyway. What it could do with is some levels and shadow work to give it a bit more punch and run through a USM filter. After that, if you want to go for B&W, then go for it.
 
I had a quick pop at this - not the same as the image in question but it shows what five minutes in PS can do:
act0984dc8_copy.jpg

I know the cutting is a little dodgy but I just wanted to show what could be done with the image supplied.
I desaturated it, then upped the contrast considerably to get it as contrasty as possible without looking too odd. Then I cut the lady out to another layer, mega-blurred the original layer and then saved it as a flat jpeg :)

You're not going to get much more detail/contrast with the image supplied.
 
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