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Joke...... Made me LOL at least

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by [email protected], 14 May 2006.

  1. [email protected]

    Hitman

    Joined: 18 Oct 2002

    Posts: 690

    Location: Wiltshire

    A man was walking along the street when he saw a ladder going into the clouds. As any of us would do, he climbed the ladder. He reached a cloud, upon which sat a rather plump and very ugly woman. "Make love to me or climb the ladder to success," she said. No contest, thought the man, so he climbed the ladder to the next cloud. On this cloud was a slightly thinner woman, who was slightly easier on the eye. "Do me hard or climb the ladder to success," she said. "Well," thought the man, "might as well carry on."
    On the next cloud was an even prettier lady who, this time, was quite attractive. "Take me now or climb the ladder to success," she uttered.
    As he turned her down and went on up the ladder, the man thought to himself that this was getting better the further he went. On the next cloud was an absolute beauty. Slim, attractive, the lot. "Just do me like crazy here and now or climb the ladder to success," she flirted.
    Unable to imagine what could be waiting, and being a gambling man, he decided to climb again. When he reached the next cloud, there was a 400 pound ugly man, arm pit hair showing, flies buzzing around his head.
    "Who are you?" the man asked.
    "Hello" said the ugly fat man, "I'm Cess!"
     
  2. SiD the Turtle

    Sgarrista

    Joined: 16 Nov 2003

    Posts: 9,682

    Location: On the pale blue dot

    Oh god no! *dies*

    Taxi!
     
  3. Richdog

    Caporegime

    Joined: 8 Sep 2005

    Posts: 26,628

    Location: Utopia

    lol @ OP's joke, nice one.


    ----------------------------

    My mum said for my birthday she was going to dig a big hole and fill it with water as a present.

    I thought: she means well...
     
    Last edited: 14 May 2006
  4. Karl

    Mobster

    Joined: 23 Oct 2002

    Posts: 3,480

    Location: No

    That one made me chuckle. :D
     
  5. ElRazur

    Capodecina

    Joined: 15 Mar 2005

    Posts: 10,424

    Location: I am everywhere...

    hahaaa ahaaaa haaaaa hhaa lolo l haaaaaa haaaaaaaaaaaa aahhhhaaaahaaaahaaaa a aaaa aaaaaaaaahaaaaa :rolleyes: :D
     
  6. Richdog

    Caporegime

    Joined: 8 Sep 2005

    Posts: 26,628

    Location: Utopia

    Me dad built a great big bookcase out of spare wood, filled it with books, until one day it fell on top of him and broke his leg.

    I said: you've only got your shelf to blame...
     
  7. MR_Punk

    Sgarrista

    Joined: 23 Mar 2004

    Posts: 8,003

    Location: Up t'north

    hehe

    The weekend seems to be throwing up good jokes!

    +44
     
  8. sja360

    Mobster

    Joined: 28 Jul 2003

    Posts: 4,005

    Location: Dundee

    dont get it :o
     
  9. ElRazur

    Capodecina

    Joined: 15 Mar 2005

    Posts: 10,424

    Location: I am everywhere...

    I would rather watch channel U on sky! :o
     
  10. Greenlizard0

    Man of Honour

    Joined: 15 Mar 2004

    Posts: 28,141

    Location: Liverpool

    What happened to the frog that broke down?



    He got toad away
     
  11. ElRazur

    Capodecina

    Joined: 15 Mar 2005

    Posts: 10,424

    Location: I am everywhere...

    Really? I thought the Egyptian girl was crying because her Dad was Mummy! :D
     
  12. yhack

    Mobster

    Joined: 6 Jan 2005

    Posts: 3,632

    Location: Cambridge

    sucCESS
     
  13. sja360

    Mobster

    Joined: 28 Jul 2003

    Posts: 4,005

    Location: Dundee

    hehe bit late but not a bad joke :o :D
     
  14. ThriceNightly

    Wise Guy

    Joined: 30 Nov 2003

    Posts: 2,329

    not bad :p
     
  15. jesta

    Mobster

    Joined: 19 Dec 2004

    Posts: 3,884

    LOL...nice one.
     
  16. Usher

    Mobster

    Joined: 30 Dec 2004

    Posts: 3,362

    When Jane initially met Tarzan of the jungle, she was attracted to him, and during her questions about his life, she asked him how he had sex.
    "Tarzan not know sex," he replied. Jane explained to him what sex was. Tarzan said, "Oh,...Tarzan use hole in trunk of tree."
    Horrified, she said, "Tarzan you have it all wrong,...but I will show you how to do it properly." She took off her clothing and lay down on the ground. "Here" she said, "you must put it in here."
    Tarzan removed his loincloth showing Jane his considerable manhood, stepped closer, and then gave her a mighty kick right in the crotch! Jane rolled around in agony for what seemed like an eternity. Eventually she managed to gasp for air and screamed: "What in the hell did you do that for?" Tarzan replied, "check for squirrel. :D
     
  17. axe

    Banned

    Joined: 1 May 2006

    Posts: 600

    lmao great :D


    the others made me lol as well
     
  18. Meatball

    Soldato

    Joined: 12 Jun 2005

    Posts: 6,303

    Location: St Albans

    LMAO, just got juice all over me :D
     
  19. decmatt

    Mobster

    Joined: 10 May 2004

    Posts: 3,731

    Location: East Yorkshire, UK

    made me laugh :D
     
  20. [email protected]

    Hitman

    Joined: 21 Jul 2005

    Posts: 790

    Location: Wakefield

    lol ill get my coat