Neighbour abandons their cat, what to do.....

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I am not sure the definition of 'pet' has to be that you can train it. Having a cat is, in my experience, just as much fun and brings as much pleasure as having a dog, but they are completely different sorts of pets.

People have snakes and I am not sure you can train them to fetch balls etc (someone will now correct me with pictures of snakes who roll over on command and play with squeaky toys, I know this).
 
Chuck it off the balcony head first to shut it up.

Interesting fact, the terminal velocity of a cat is not usually fatal. It falls at about 60mph which would be fatal but during the fall they have a way of self righting and opening their body to slow the fall to about 52mph which makes a massive difference and means they can usually survive. Look it up.
 
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