So you do what many of older men have done on here. Have a kid with a women who is 15 to 20 years younger than you.
It's about the age of them not you
Parents - How old were you when your first child was born?
- Thread starter RastaManBob
- Start date
So you do what many of older men have done on here. Have a kid with a women who is 15 to 20 years younger than you.
It's about the age of them not you
Just read this thread very interesting, my parents were 21m/18f, I'm now in my mid 40s, my OH is late 30s, we got no kids, I guess we are too late now. Scared to be 65+ and kid just starting University. Should I just say sod it and get some dogs/cats?
Associate
I was 28 and my wife 31 when our first child was born.
I am planning on having kids in the 35-40 bracket. I will by then have lived my life, done and seen most things I want to do, and racked up a good and stable career in another country known for being the absolute top tier in terms of quality of life and education system. I will have done more to secure mine and my kids future by waiting and focussing on sorting my life and career out than I could ever have done when I was younger.
In fact I would say that when they eventually arrive, my kids are going to be seriously lucky kids. They certainly wouldn't have been 10 years ago.
In fact I would say that when they eventually arrive, my kids are going to be seriously lucky kids. They certainly wouldn't have been 10 years ago.
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Soldato
I was 30 she was 32, baby is now 16 months. Ours was actually earlier than we planned but we couldn't be happier. We've talked about a second and we don't want to leave it too long.
Associate
both me and misses 17 was not planned contraception failed so i had to grow up fast between full time job and and still studying was a hard start but she is 13 years old now me and her mum been together since 15 friends from 11 a very stupid start to life thankfully through hard work i now have a very good life
I know you love your kid and wouldn't change them for the world, but this is the exact kind of situation for which abortion was legalized.
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Soldato
I had just turned 30 and Mrs was 34 married for 1.5years and live in the north (...of England for the bitter Scots). He's 2 in July so an awesome age.
It's hard, wouldn't like to wait much longer. Just make sure you've traveled as much as you want to and done everything prior as you won't get time. 3 of my best mates currently have girlfriends and still living free and easy, I miss it sometimes but I've been there and done that so don't mind.
It's hard, wouldn't like to wait much longer. Just make sure you've traveled as much as you want to and done everything prior as you won't get time. 3 of my best mates currently have girlfriends and still living free and easy, I miss it sometimes but I've been there and done that so don't mind.
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Well done
True but they have done well. Apart from one, all of my friends who had kids in their teen/early 20's ended up being single parents before they turned 25.
This I agree with 100%. Dont what to end up having a mid-life crisis. Partying and drinking in your late 40s or 50s when you should have done it when you was younger before having kids.
You see plenty of those in Reflex or other 80's bars on Saturday nights.
Soldato
Whilst I understand where you're coming from, surely the situation you highlighted is the exact reason many people are uncomfortable with abortion: that being that bartledvd has successfully brought up a child as a young parent in what seems a happy and stable household, despite the "sensible" option, and probably a certain amount of social pressure, to abort. The idea that Bartle and his partner may, under different circumstances, have been pressured into taking the termination option is, in hindsight, a potential tragedy.
The exact reason abortion is legalised is more to protect vulnerable women (generally), for whom an unwanted pregnancy may lead to harm of some sort - mental or physical health - or due to fetal malformity. The law doesn't, as far as I'm aware, actually make provision for abortion for reasons of convenience - though it has, though social convention, moved to leave that choice to the woman in question.
(I'm pro-choice, by the way. Just playing devil's advocate, and suggesting the potential pitfalls of making the "choice" bit too normalised/expected)
Don
This is also my plan (currently at second)
Need to make sure both kids at school and not nursery if we have a third. Them prices...
Associate
I was 36, the wife 33.
I was given a choice, now or never.
(The wife comes from a family that has children young and felt that 35+ is a no go).
We are in the East Midlands and don't plan to have any more children...
I was given a choice, now or never.
(The wife comes from a family that has children young and felt that 35+ is a no go).
We are in the East Midlands and don't plan to have any more children...
Soldato
29, the Lady, 32
32, wife was 33. That was almost 3 years ago. Our second turns 1 next week.
It was the right time for us. We decided to stop being so careful rather than actually go out our way to try. Took a month, where some of our friends had been trying for years. So perhaps a little quicker than ideal, but we didn't really want to start much older.
2 so close together is hard though. We have 2 girls, and as much as I want a boy, there is just no way I want to have another just now. I'm looking forward to packing them off to their grandparents for the weekend too much. Neither me nor the wife wanted to send them packing too young, but after 3.5 years of not having a night out, it's time.
Not that that is everything though. They don't sleep at the same time, preferring to tag team it, tapping each other in and out. So we get very little time to ourselves. They will no doubt get better as they get older, but it has been a really tough year for us.
Maybe when they are both at school we may consider our last child. But we might feel too old by then, lol.
It was the right time for us. We decided to stop being so careful rather than actually go out our way to try. Took a month, where some of our friends had been trying for years. So perhaps a little quicker than ideal, but we didn't really want to start much older.
2 so close together is hard though. We have 2 girls, and as much as I want a boy, there is just no way I want to have another just now. I'm looking forward to packing them off to their grandparents for the weekend too much. Neither me nor the wife wanted to send them packing too young, but after 3.5 years of not having a night out, it's time.
Not that that is everything though. They don't sleep at the same time, preferring to tag team it, tapping each other in and out. So we get very little time to ourselves. They will no doubt get better as they get older, but it has been a really tough year for us.
Maybe when they are both at school we may consider our last child. But we might feel too old by then, lol.
Soldato
I'm 43 now, the Beloved other half is 29, coming up 30
Had our first when I was 31 and she was 18.
Have 2 more born 18 months apart, those were tough times!
Had our first when I was 31 and she was 18.
Have 2 more born 18 months apart, those were tough times!
Associate
1st at 38 2nd at 40... The wife is talking about a 3rd for when the 1st starts school, so I guess I will be pushing 43 if I let her get her way.
A work friend had twins at 48, his oldest are 21 and 18
A work friend had twins at 48, his oldest are 21 and 18