Petty or over sensitive parents?

[Slinwagh]

Yesterday afternoon out little 3 year old girl, Kira was in the garden playing. On the wall the separates us from the neighbours she had 3 tubs of water, large medium and small, the largest being the size of a coffee pot, the smallest being tea cup size.

She was happily playing away pouring water from one pot to another, next thing we hear "Excuse me Kira, can you please stop doing that, there is water on my cushions" now fair play if she was throwing gallons of water over the wall but that wasn't the case, couple that with the fact that the neighbours tone was plain nasty we were not best pleased.

What had happened was some of the water had run off the wall and dripped down onto the neighbours sun lounger, looking over the wall there was a trickle of water, hardly anything at all bearing in mind it was 20'c or more here yesterday!

Does anyone else think this is just very petty or are we being over sensitive!!!

 

[Dano]

You're being over sensitive, they have every right to complain it was their property after all. Instead of letting it go maybe you should have used the opportunity to explain to your daughter that damage or potential damage however minor to others property is not a good thing, that way She has a chance of actually caring when She is older and wont be like the majority of kids that we see these days who don't see that damage or destruction of property is wrong.

 

[Mark47]

petty.

 

[KaHn]

If the tone was harsh I would have said something then, don't go picking up little fueds over something so small.

But in future if they say something out of tone then tell them not to talk to your child like that, if they have a problem with your child they should talk to the parents.

KaHn

 

[Gilly]

I'm lost.

Your little girl was pouring something over your garden wall onto your neighbour's stuff, they politely asked her to stop, and you're asking if it was petty?

You should have already stopped her by that point.

 

[Slinwagh]

I'm lost.

Your little girl was pouring something over your garden wall onto your neighbour's stuff, they politely asked her to stop, and you're asking if it was petty?

You should have already stopped her by that point.

She wasn't pouring it over the wall, she was puring it from one pot to another and it, the water she spilt then ran of the wall, down the other side of the wall and onto the cushion of the sun lounger.

If she was just pouring it over the wall then we would have done something about it but this just was not the case.

 

[Gilly]

She wasn't pouring it over the wall, she was puring it from one pot to another and it, the water she spilt then ran of the wall, down the other side of the wall and onto the cushion of the sun lounger.

...after which your neighbour politely asked her to stop, at which point she did?

End of problem?

I'm still not convinced its a good idea for a 3 year old to have water on a wall adjoining onto a neighbour's garden.

 

[Bar]

Views will vary between those that have kids and those that do not.

Sounds like the other people handled it badly and should have spoken to you.

More and more I find people speaking to kids (mine and others) in a tone of voice that is just not on. Usually far too aggresive and dismissive, where as a nice word can make all the difference.

 

[Slinwagh]

...after which your neighbour politely asked her to stop, at which point she did?

End of problem?

I'm still not convinced its a good idea for a 3 year old to have water on a wall adjoining onto a neighbour's garden.

The neighbour was in no way polite, it was a nasty tone, one your can't convey here.

 

[div0]

I'm also confused. Pouring water from container to container requires a wall?

Apologise to neighbour for your kid getting some water on their stuff, move child to middle of your garden - problem solved.

Make a big deal out of it if you want, and possibly have a long running feud with your neighbour(s).

I understand that the tone can be an issue, but if it's the first instance, then I'd apologise and let it slip. Keep things civil and you'll be able to adress the "tone" that they speak to your child with, if and when they say something in that tone again.

 

[Slinwagh]

I'm also confused. Pouring water from container to container requires a wall?

Apologise to neighbour for your kid getting some water on their stuff, move child to middle of your garden - problem solved.

Make a big deal out of it if you want, and then have a long running feud with your neighbour(s).

It didn't require a wall! She just put the pots on the wall as it about waist height!

Also we really don't have a problem with anyone telling Kira not to do something, but there is no need to be nasty and convey your message in the tone that was used.

 

[Gilly]

Views will vary between those that have kids and those that do not.

And how would you say those views would lie?

The neighbour was in no way polite, it was a nasty tone, one your can't convey here.

Then move the kid and have a quiet word with the neighbour. I wouldn't bother returning to it now, that would indeed be petty.

I'm also confused. Pouring water from container to container requires a wall?

Apologise to neighbour for your kid getting some water on their stuff, move child to middle of your garden - problem solved.

 

[div0]

It didn't require a wall! She just put the pots on the wall as it about waist height!

Also we really don't have a problem with anyone telling Kira not to do something, but there is no need to be nasty and convey your message in the tone that was used.

That's my point though. They asked her to stop because she'd spilt some water onto their side of the wall.

This is a completely petty issue. But surely the easiest thing to do is to apologise and move your child into the middle of your garden and away from them.

I agree that its wrong for other parents to use an innapropriate tone towards someone elses child. But if this is the first time, and it's such a petty issue (spilled water), I'd just leave it for now and make sure that I moved the child away from where she might cause anw more argument between you and the neighbour.

Your girl was just doing what kids do - no point escalating it into a big debate.

 

[PsiFox]

Might have been a dribble this time. but it could have been a coffee pot sized amount, which would not impress me if I was lying on the lounger

 

[singist]

They are in the right and you are trying to justify your resentment by describing the tone used as 'nasty' when asking your child to stop.

Explain to your child why the neighbours weren't happy and try to make sure it doesn't happen again; A good relationship with neighbours is beneficial all round.

 

[Tripnologist]

Rather sad of them to complain if it was just a trickle of water. Regardless though, I think they had every right to complain about it but they shouldn't have done so in a nasty tone.

OMGZ! Not water!! Do they not realise they live in the UK? Ask them to wait a bit. It'll rain.

 

[basmic]

The neighbour was in no way polite, it was a nasty tone, one your can't convey here.

Was your neighbour on the lounger when it was being splashed?

You should have used your loaf TBH, and got the kid to play on the grass or wherever.

 

[KaHn]

I don't think the problem is with what the kid was doing, it was the tone of the neighbor which is at fault here, especially towards a 3 year old.

Like I said before I think it would be petty to return to it now, in future keep your kid away from the grumpy old gits and problem solved

KaHn

 

[Slinwagh]

Was your neighbour on the lounger when it was being splashed?

You should have used your loaf TBH, and got the kid to play on the grass or wherever.

No they weren't, they just came out and saw the water that had run down the wall onto the lounger.

 

[Helium_Junkie]

Your kid got water on someone elses stuff (by accident doesnt excuse it) and was asked to move. Sounds pretty reasonable to me, move the toys and apologise for the water.

If you "accidentally" smacked someone in the face, would you refuse to apologise just because it was unintentional?