Stupid things friends / co-workers have said to you

Soldato
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A thread for the "please tell me that person did not just say that".

Obviously, do not name any names.

I will start with perhaps 2 of my favs.

Friends conversation with his father a few years ago.

Dad: "Do you want any custard?"
Son: "um, what type?"
Dad: "Birds custard"
Son: "Birds custard? Is that made from real birds like chickens or whatever?"

:p

(worse part is he actually told me and another friend of that conversation).

Another friend, calling me.

Him: "Hi, I am just installing windows Vista and need to ask something real quick"
Me: "What is the problem?"
Him: "I am on the license screen, do I chose accept yeah?"
Me: "No... you chose you decline and you don't install the OS on your BLANK hard drive"
Him: "really? so what do I need to do"
Me: *sad sigh*

Well anyways, as per normal, no personal attacks / naming of people or whatever :)
 
Soldato
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Talking to colleagues at work about our star signs.

A temp girl from Poland said she is a Lobster!

Obviously she meant Crab, but my god did I laugh.

She wouldn't talk to me after that.

:p
 
Soldato
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So many stupid things said by my housemates it's unreal.

So many infact I can't remember any good ones :(
 
Soldato
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I once had this conversation with my mum, when I was about 10. She gave the Dog some food but she wouldn't eat it, and hadn't for a couple of days.

Me: "Mum, is our Dog a virgin?"
Mum: "What? Why are you asking that?"
Me: "Because she doesnt eat meat."
Mum: "Vegetarian? No."

I didn't realise my mistake for a few years. Innocent I am. :D
 
Caporegime
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"I think alternative/eastern medicine is much more effective..."

from a woman :rolleyes:

despite me pointing out that if it actually worked/could be proved to be effective it wouldn't be 'alternative' and would simply become part of the general body of medical knowledge.
 
Soldato
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"I think alternative/eastern medicine is much more effective..."

from a woman :rolleyes:

despite me pointing out that if it actually worked/could be proved to be effective it wouldn't be 'alternative' and would simply become part of the general body of medical knowledge.

It might not be part of our culture because the fat money-making suits of our 'lovely country' can't make any money out of it. Even if that isn't the main reason, I'd bet my right nut that it's partly responsible for it not being more widely used.
 
Permabanned
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It might not be part of our culture because the fat money-making suits of our 'lovely country' can't make any money out of it. Even if that isn't the main reason, I'd bet my right nut that it's partly responsible for it not being more widely used.

Exactly! Because nobody makes any mony out of alternative (read: bull****) medicines.
 

Zip

Zip

Soldato
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Australia
I once had this conversation with my mum, when I was about 10. She gave the Dog some food but she wouldn't eat it, and hadn't for a couple of days.

Me: "Mum, is our Dog a virgin?"
Mum: "What? Why are you asking that?"
Me: "Because she doesnt eat meat."
Mum: "Vegetarian? No."

I didn't realise my mistake for a few years. Innocent I am. :D


I did that once trying to quote a movie to my older brother and mum:o

Said something along the lines of "Ill get that little virgin":o

I meant Vermin and had no idea why people were weeing them selves with laughter until a few years later:o
 
Soldato
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England
The other day I asked my friend opposite me on his computer if he was left handed because the mouse was on the other side to mine.

Man, I felt like a right plank. Serious brain fart moment.
 
Soldato
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Friend: "So I woke up and couldn't remember what my name was, where I lived or what my phone number was...."

Me: "Sorry, what?! You forgot what your name was?"

Friend: "Yeah... so? Everyone forgets their name at least 2 or 3 times a year, don't they?"
 
Soldato
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"Gotta go mum, waves are up and I'm off surfing"

"But it's raining, you'll get wet"
 
Soldato
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Reading, Berkshire
Was at a BBQ on a beach once and some joke came up about freedom of the press and the two girls with us asked what it was *sigh*

Was an ICT lesson at college once and some girl (possibly the stupidest person I have ever seen) was moaning she couldn't get any signal of her mobile. Someone said they had plenty of reception to which she replied "its called signal not reception!" :/
 
Soldato
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Oh! thought of another.

A temp girl I was working with complained about the stairs in our old place, and I said "its not that bad, its only 13 steps on each flight, and only 4 flights) so only 52 in total.

She then asked "well how many is it going down then?"
 
Soldato
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Sunny Manchester
Stupid things that co-workers have said.

Guy at work was after a new car. Something pretty cheap <£1500, cheap on parts, to run etc.

Told him to get a Mondeo, it had Mondeo written all over it. Hes stuburn and said that Ford's were crap and did'nt want one. He ended up buying a T reg Saab 93-s, thats broke down more times than hes had it on the road.

Still thinks he was right in buying the Saab :p
 
Soldato
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When I was little we had found a frog and I was holding it and it decided to pee on me to which I said

"Ewww it leaked on me!"

Then my family all wet themselves laughing and still take the P today, oh the shame.
 
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