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The OcUK Relationship Counselling and Hugs Thread

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by mattyprice4004, Apr 23, 2012.

Tags:
  1. Teh_Next

    Gangster

    Joined: Nov 3, 2018

    Posts: 356

    Location: The other side of The Gap

    I don't mean to be a negative Nancy/pedant, but if any of you need to change then it's all ready over.
    I'd be more open to compromising differences as to change. If that makes any sense?
     
  2. Hades

    Capodecina

    Joined: Oct 19, 2002

    Posts: 21,406

    Location: Surrey and London

    Good luck. We're here if needed (I'll probably be going to bed in 30 mins).
     
  3. Teh_Next

    Gangster

    Joined: Nov 3, 2018

    Posts: 356

    Location: The other side of The Gap

    Good luck anyway. Hope it sorts itself out mate.
    TC
     
  4. bakes0310

    Capodecina

    Joined: Oct 22, 2004

    Posts: 11,926

    Thanks all, ocuk is a great community.
     
  5. 413x

    Capodecina

    Joined: Jan 13, 2010

    Posts: 15,603

    Location: Stamford

    Yeah you can't change who you are but you can make changes. For example me and my gf recently had chat where if I do x and she does y it makes z better. Because this was really the only little issue for us we are able to make it work.
    Those are the sort of changes I mean. Not changing your personality
     
  6. bakes0310

    Capodecina

    Joined: Oct 22, 2004

    Posts: 11,926

    It's not personality changes really, sorry didn't explain anything. Just other issues that needs to be sorted or halfway to make things work. Which although hard got to happen.
     
  7. Teh_Next

    Gangster

    Joined: Nov 3, 2018

    Posts: 356

    Location: The other side of The Gap

    We're singing from the same hymn sheet there, I'd reckon. :cool:
     
  8. Teh_Next

    Gangster

    Joined: Nov 3, 2018

    Posts: 356

    Location: The other side of The Gap

    sorry made no sense, deleted.
     
  9. 413x

    Capodecina

    Joined: Jan 13, 2010

    Posts: 15,603

    Location: Stamford

    Yeah, just some semantics I think. :)
     
  10. Teh_Next

    Gangster

    Joined: Nov 3, 2018

    Posts: 356

    Location: The other side of The Gap

    Mint! :)

    Has to be said though. Don't compromise too much, keep it feisty or it runs the risk of losing respect for each other. :D

    Man relationships are mental when you start over thinking them.
     
  11. MartinPrince

    Gangster

    Joined: Aug 14, 2018

    Posts: 247

    I hope things have settled down and been sorted out. Though eventual marriage is not a thing to be gone into unless you are absolutely sure; you could still end up being wrong but if you go into it with 'major' issues then they often tend to worsen as time goes on.
     
  12. XeNoN89

    Sgarrista

    Joined: Mar 6, 2007

    Posts: 7,584

    Location: SW19

    So I've been kind of seeing someone for a few weeks, been on a few dates etc. Do I get her a small Christmas present or is that too early?? I've had some say get something and others say don't! Can't decide...
     
  13. fredwi

    Gangster

    Joined: Jul 24, 2016

    Posts: 109

    I don't think it would hurt
     
  14. Narj

    Capodecina

    Joined: Feb 19, 2010

    Posts: 11,767

    Location: London

    something small and thoughtful. Don't spend lots of cash.
     
  15. Roar87

    Mobster

    Joined: May 10, 2012

    Posts: 4,398

    Location: Leeds

    Absolutely get her a present, just make sure it's funny or a sex toy, or a funny sex toy
     
  16. Trappi$t

    Perma Banned

    Joined: Oct 30, 2018

    Posts: 320

    A handful of dates? Not a proper one IMO. Maybe something extremely small like a nice chocolate bar/box or something equally as trivial. Anything more and you start to look like a "chaser" and a little desperate too soon.

    Easy enough to test the water with humour anyway...

    "So listen wee hen, I've got some fishnets and Rhubarb lined up for your Christmas, what you getting me?" or some other silly tester.

    Presents are a little irrelevant anyway, they mean more to women in terms of giving to others, than they do to any of us guys.

    I'd rather not get anything at all at Christmas, the company of your other half is enough, and this should be a more popular sentiment that it currently is.
     
  17. Nevakonaza

    Mobster

    Joined: Jan 7, 2009

    Posts: 4,335

    Location: Stourbridge,West Mids.

    Has anyone ever been in this situation?

    been seeing a girl for over a year now..been going out a lot together places and got really close,she has feelings for me and so do i for her we have talked about this and she also says she loves me and the same back,BUT even though we aint "Officially" a couple because she wanted to see how it "works out" when people associate us together as a couple shes messaging me saying people assume were a couple,And then im thinking does she not want people to assume that then?

    I've asked her that,Do you not want people to assume were together then,And she skipped answering the question which was really annoying..should i just not bother pursuing anymore?
     
  18. ivrytwr3

    Mobster

    Joined: Aug 25, 2006

    Posts: 3,237

    A year together and you aren't 'officially' a couple or she does not acknowledge you are together to other people? Sounds like you are a side chick or you are the safe bet until someone better comes along - ie keeping her options open.

     
  19. malachi

    Sgarrista

    Joined: Jun 27, 2006

    Posts: 8,568

    Location: Earth

    Sounds like she waiting for someone better or has someone else in mind.

    Either way, she's wasting your time.
     
  20. Janesy B

    Capodecina

    Joined: Apr 19, 2008

    Posts: 24,938

    She's monkey branching.