The OP hasn't given much information, but it sounds more like seating position is the issue rather than changing gears.
Either way, it just sounds like a fantastic opportunity to get out there and test ride a huge number of bikes! I certainly wouldn't be sniffy about riding a scooter - I've ridden plenty and they're great fun. The last one I rode was in Vietnam over the Hai Van pass, of Top Gear fame!
I'd hang up my boots to be honest, if only for a while and see if things get better.
I would get an NC750 with DCT, whatever you do. Don't get a scooter...
Heel/toe shifter on a big lumpy cruiser not do the trick?
Are they anything like maxi pads?