I've ruined my relationship by sleeping with someone else.

divadiow · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:10

howdydoody said:
You know that when you drink you go 'loopy' and can not handle it, you also know that mixing medication and drink wil lresult in all sorts of problems yet you do them both anyway?

You need to spend some time on your own, sort yourself out because if you cannot look after yourself properly then I have no idea how you expect to be able to maintain a succesful relationship.

As has already been said you need to get tested for sexually transmitted infections/diseases.

And next time you feel like having a drink, just remember this and the fact that you slept with a random stranger who could have been HIV+. Scary eh?

As for your relationship, im not sure with your name whether your male or female, either way, there is nothing you can do but say your sorry and that you are stupid.

I will be getting tested, and my boyfriend. I'm male and so is he :rolleyes:

That's punishment enough perhaps, but I don't want to lose this person.

divadiow · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:10

howdydoody said:
You know that when you drink you go 'loopy' and can not handle it, you also know that mixing medication and drink wil lresult in all sorts of problems yet you do them both anyway?

You need to spend some time on your own, sort yourself out because if you cannot look after yourself properly then I have no idea how you expect to be able to maintain a succesful relationship.

As has already been said you need to get tested for sexually transmitted infections/diseases.

And next time you feel like having a drink, just remember this and the fact that you slept with a random stranger who could have been HIV+. Scary eh?

As for your relationship, im not sure with your name whether your male or female, either way, there is nothing you can do but say your sorry and that you are stupid.

EDIT:

So why do it if it never works???

I don't know. It's still an escape I suppose.

Zip · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:11

The Mad Rapper said:
If you're going to be sarcastic then put an emoticon after that so he knows you're not being serious

I actually thinks hes a she going from its name! :eek:

If so you better go get the morning after pill

Edit: I was fooled, it turns out its a he after all

iCraig · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:15

You need to get a grip and control your drinking and self-medication. Give it up, before it ruins you completely. Seek professional help if necessary.

As for your relationship, you screwed up. If your partner forgives you, it's at their discretion now. You hurt them and now it's up to them if they can forgive you or not. If they can't, you need to accept it and move on. You have no right to keep the relationship alive now if your partner doesn't wish to.

Good luck.

howdydoody · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:15

divadiow said:
I don't know. It's still an escape I suppose.

People only need an escape because they think life is so bad, however, many dont realise that the way they choose to escape only adds to how bad their life is.

divadiow said:
I will be getting tested, and my boyfriend. I'm male and so is he

That's punishment enough perhaps, but I don't want to lose this person.

not sure whats with the rolleyes there!

You have to face the fact that there is now nothing you can do to save your relationship. Its future lies in your boyfriends hands, you just need to give him lots of space.

jakeke · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:17

Erm, stop drinking if that isn't obvious enough. You screwed up big time, if I was her you'd be gone for good. Good luck I suppose.

howdydoody · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:19

jakeke said:
Erm, stop drinking if that isn't obvious enough. You screwed up big time, if I was her you'd be gone for good. Good luck I suppose.

obviously someone hasnt read past the first post

benneh · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:20

Leeches, put them on your temples.

platypus · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:25

divadiow said:
I have broken my partners heart and I have no idea why. I am disgusted with myself and have said I will do anything to keep the relationship.

I would break up with someone the second I knew they had broken that level of trust. It's not something you can take back, ever.

You've done something unforgivable, maybe he can learn to live with it, probably she can't. Offer him as comfortable way out of the relationship as you can.

As an aside, get your alcohol problem sorted.

Stelly · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:25

maybe you should be thinking of her, instead of feeling sorry for yourself

Stelly

Things change I've changed · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:25

divadiow said:
I drink to try to feel normal, it never works.

if it never works then why..................blah blah blah.

end of the day mate you need professional help (I don't mean that offensively).

Von Smallhausen · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:26

benneh said:
Leeches, put them on your temples.

It's not his temples he wants to put leaches on .......

I thought that one's member was for peeing out of until I discovered otherwise, aged 30.

badbob · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:27

Simple- when you go out wear a t-shirt that says "Don't sleep with me, I have STD's"

Hilly · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:28

You've messed your relationship up, due to the lack of love for your self. you Don't deserve a relationship if you have all of these problems. if you knew about them, then why did you drink?

No sympathy from me, you're GF must deserve better.

Zip · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:30

Von Smallhausen said:
\

I thought that one's member was for peeing out of until I discovered otherwise, aged 30.

I discoverd the fun factor in the bath at age 9

I didnt know what happend TBH and run out the bath in fear!

Luckey i was a shy kid because if i hadnt been i would have done my first thoughts and told mum that some "weird" just happend when playing with it in the bath

Glaucus · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:34

What the hell are you doing mixing mind altering drugs with alcohol.

Burnsy2023 · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:36

Stelly said:
maybe you should be thinking of her, instead of feeling sorry for yourself

Stelly

I agree, stop feeling sorry for yourself and do something about it. If she really means anything to you then you'll get some help and show her that your worth another try.

Burnsy

basmic · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:40

divadiow said:
I will be getting tested, and my boyfriend. I'm male and so is he

That's punishment enough perhaps, but I don't want to lose this person.

Assuming your gay here - which, from the above, is a safe assumption.

Being gay myself, I know how rare and hard a gay relationship can be. I suppose if you do plenty of grovelling, he might give you another chance - but the chances of this, are bloody slim TBH.

Sort things out with the other half. If he doesn't want to be with you, then accept it - there's nothing worse than a forced relationship! If he does want to be with you, I'd treat him like royalty for the next few months.

Either way, I feel it is important you emphasise why you did what you did. If I were you, I wouldn't even try using the booze as an excuse though.

After you've split or made up, it would then be a good time to see a counsellor - either yourself, or you and the OH. Me and the OH had a rough patch, and found seeling a counsellor at Relate helped us a lot - probably more than we both realise.

Get the booze problem out the way, stop pretending to be somebody you're not.

MookJong · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:43

This is your wake up call, the event that will hopefully shock you into sorting yourself out.

You need to be brutally honest and ask why your self medicating, what is it your trying to cover up or escape from. Then seek help to resolve it.

Also as suggested for the sake of your partner and future partners you should be having an STD test.

FerociouS · 5 Nov 2007 at 11:43

Unlucky mate.