Funniest things your friends ever said...

Have a few but cant remember them all, some are mostly just funny to us though..

Mate 1: I have a craving for a game of poker..
Mate 2: Haha..what one is that again? The one where you get 21?
Mate 1: ?!?!

Another was sitting in the park and had a bottle of water when having a break from football.. "wonder who invented water...and if they can make a less dense water too.."

:(:(
 
A friend of a friend came with a small group of us to see Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring one evening. At the end of the film, we all stood up to walk out of the cinema and he stops at the front of the group, turns around and says, "You would have thought you'd get to see them destroy the ring like". I guess you had to be there but that thought still cracks me up now.
 
The most random thing one of my friends did was at a NYE party. He'd been sat in an armchair for the vast majority of the evening, his level of consciousness drifting between sleep and drunken stupor when all of a sudden he sits up, stares at the group of us opposite him and shouts 'YOU CAN'T JUST DRIVE ON TO A FERRY AND EXPECT TO TAP IT LIKE A CHOCOLATE ORANGE!'.
 
A girl i know, whilst playing articulate, was given two clues which where 'its Australian and when you throw it, it comes back'. she said kangaroo...
 
the dyslexic GF bought her sister a Aretha Franklin CD and wrote in the card:

"To Sally

Happy Birthday

I know how much you love urethra.

Best wishes

Meg"

B@Th*nG
 
Hard one to describe but ill give it a go

When at uni sat watching Countdown with my flat mates as you do.

My mate walks into the room just as Voderman has spelt a winning word out on the wall

Cue my friend


"sw-ord" whats a "sw-ord"

ohhh a "sword"
 
Friend from work went out with his GF and her younger sis to the cinema....

When he got back he told us how little sis was flirting with him and eating her candyfloss all seductively..

Me: But isn't she like,13?

Him: Yeah! but she looks 15.........

Rest of work: er...

Him: ....... I mean 16.

Me: That doesn't make it right...

anim_puke.gif
 
Whilst playing poker one evening with a group of friends one of them who doesn't really know how to play that well started laying big money on the table.

Intrigued by this another of my friends calls every raise. When it comes to the time to reveal the cards my friend who knows how to play revealed a pair of 10's.

The other friend, looking so pleased with himself lays down his cards and declares a straight. We all look down and see Q, K, A, 2, 3 :D

His name is Newby so from that day forward we refer to that hand as a "Newby- Straight".
 
Was at a works curry night... manager of helpdesk suddenly said...

'if i was a woman I'd quite fancy steve' (another guy at table)

the whole room went quiet, I could hear distant church bell as tumble weed flew by.. everyone was very afraid, he blamed it on being drunk.
 
Few crackers from my mate.

"Do play.com have a shop in town?"

Business Management test - Name some brands of the following:

Chocolate.

Mate: err like chocolate on a plate, that you can eat.
 
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