Relationships and money

If she likes being dominated like someone above said - buy the gear, when she complains, kick her in the ovaries. You get shinies, she gets dominated. win win.
 
Youre both living and saving as family, youre both working hard, its certainly no fun going to work and not getting to spend the fruits of your labour, it feels like there is no point to working this way.
You have a lot of cash coming in, if you have so much left after paying your mortgages then why dont you suggest that you only save like this for 10 months a year and the remaining 2 months you split, and go out and buy whatever the hell either of you want, thats what I would do with my wife
 
Spending a bit more money on 'now' may only delay your plans for the future by a couple of months - not that much in the grand scheme of things, is it? Just be honest with her and explain that you'd like a new toy. There's no point in being miserable if you've got the money to avoid being so.

If you've got time (70hr week suggests this may be difficult), take her out for a nice meal on the day your telly/whatever arrives. It'll take the edge off things and show her that she means more to you.

Being all neanderthal might work a few times, but unless she's the kind of girl who goes for this, it may end up descending into arguments.
 
Break the TV so you have to buy another.
PC components go inside the case, how will she know the difference between what CPU you have now and a quad core or different graphics card?

man it up, break the tv and order the pc parts and just install them :p
 
Surely if you're earning/paying back that much a new treat every now and then won't push the mortages back too far?

Work out a possible spending allowance or something, if you can find a balance that pushes the mortage back a year or two but allows for a better standard of life in the present then prehaps that would be a better option?

If you can go up to her and say, we could pay off the mortage in 4 years time but have an extra grand a month free to get things we want and live a happier life for those 4 years than a penny pinching 3 years. What would she respond?

In the end it's good to pay off your debts but from the sound of it you can afford to pay them off and live decently right now.

Either way I'd definately first try to talk to her and reach a compromise before just buying something and starting an arguement.

Also, 70hr week? Ouch! :eek:
 
The way we work it is I pay the mortgage and she pays for everything else. Then £1k goes into savings and what ever we have left is our own money.

I can certainly see the merit in what your other half is wanting to do. After all a few years pain and then the worlds your oyster.
 
sit her down and tell her you want some slack one month so you can treat yourself, and thats all you really think you are going to want to ask for, and you understand the whole getting the debts payed off early etc but really want just one month to have a treat, why dont you suggest that you both have a month off the whole future thing and holiday from it, its only 1 month, and it shows you are commited for the long term too.
 
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Buy your PC and tell her to get over it.

Let a women be part of who you are, not make you who you are.
 
I earn ok money, nothing compared to people on here but not bad for me. I earn money in order to buy myself nice things. If i had less money my things wouldnt be so nice. If you are constantly chasing the "next thing" then you lose sign of the present. I would say buy what you want and enjoy it while you can. Id rather have small houses filled with cool stuff than big houses that im struggling to afford. Im sure your girl is nice but she sounds like Margo from "The Good Life"
 
i think legally even though you are not married and everything is in your name, she would still have a right to a %'age of your properties. my solicitor advised me about this when i bought my house. worthwhile speaking to someone if you want clarification :)
 
Combat squirrel said:
ahhh the consumerism society, personally id sell all those houses, just rent where you happen to be living, and enjoy life, by the time mortgages are paid off most people are past there prime anyways, and have missed the golden opportunity to have thousands of ££ a month to play with, easily travel with that amount of money, see the world etc.
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I'm 28, she's 25. If I don't screw up and keep knuckling down and save, we can be mortgage and rent free by the time I'm 31 and her 28. Imagine how much money we can have to spend then and how much traveling we can do:D
Hardly past our prime.

But yes, I see everyone's points of view. I've sat her down just now and we've seriously discussed the new TV and PC. She's agreed to a budget of £1300 for both (I fought like a lion for £1500, but it was not to be). It won't set us back at all, and will be made back within a week. I've asked her if she also wanted anything big and expensive, but she don't, only for me to stop wanting new and expensive stuff after I get the new shinies.
 
regulus said:
But yes, I see everyone's points of view. I've sat her down just now and we've seriously discussed the new TV and PC. She's agreed to a budget of £1300 for both (I fought like a lion for £1500, but it was not to be). It won't set us back at all, and will be made back within a week. I've asked her if she also wanted anything big and expensive, but she don't, only for me to stop wanting new and expensive stuff after I get the new shinies.
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You don't see anything wrong with that?

Personally, I find that emasculating... but it could be a maturity thing (as in, I'm too immature to understand).
 
regulus said:
But yes, I see everyone's points of view. I've sat her down just now and we've seriously discussed the new TV and PC. She's agreed to a budget of £1300 for both (I fought like a lion for £1500, but it was not to be). It won't set us back at all, and will be made back within a week. I've asked her if she also wanted anything big and expensive, but she don't, only for me to stop wanting new and expensive stuff after I get the new shinies.
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People in acting like adults shocker.
 
meghatronic said:
You don't see anything wrong with that?
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I do actually, but as I pointed out in the first post, nobody knows the intricacies of the relationship. You base your theory on what you're read here, and reading through what I've said, I actually laugh at "Regulus" too. Things are a tad more complicated.
 
meghatronic said:
You don't see anything wrong with that?

Personally, I find that emasculating... but it could be a maturity thing (as in, I'm too immature to understand).
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I thought that being in a relationship was meant to be fun, loving and with a certain amount of give and take.

That just sounds like a drag.:(

You can spend 1300 but not 1500.

Who does she think she is?

Your mother?:eek:
 
regulus said:
I do actually, but as I pointed out in the first post, nobody knows the intricacies of the relationship. You base your theory on what you're read here, and reading through what I've said, I actually laugh at "Regulus" too. Things are a tad more complicated.
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.... she's amazingly hot isn't she. That's it. :p
 
Hmm, good point. It certainly seems that way in writing :)

Anyway, thanks for all the varied inputs, it sure is interesting to read all the points of view. If only things were always so simple as everyone makes them sound :D
I can assure everyone that my money is my own and can take it and leave anytime I want, but I owe her an immense gratitude for matters in the past and will continue to invest in the future I planned for us and she is following through on so strongly.

I'm off to work now, catch you all later! :)
 
It is fair enough as long as she is being equally frugal, but most women I know will tell you one thing and do another. If you trust her then it is all good but be careful she isn't playing you.
 
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