A little shocked

fini · 14 Dec 2008 at 14:40

Set fire to the computer.

Lets see her flirting on that

Talbs13 · 14 Dec 2008 at 15:02

Leave that horrible scumbag.

Mik3 · 14 Dec 2008 at 15:02

I wouldn't think to much into it, we all want to feel sexy and wanted and marriage doesn't stop that, its probably just a little harmless flirting.

Gigi · 14 Dec 2008 at 15:06

Mik3 said:
I wouldn't think to much into it, we all want to feel sexy and wanted and marriage doesn't stop that, its probably just a little harmless flirting.

So if your wife stated she was single with no kids you would be ok with that?

Mik3 · 14 Dec 2008 at 15:13

Gigi said:
So if your wife stated she was single with no kids you would be ok with that?

Probably not, but we all do it, its part of our genetics.

As said its probably just flirting. He shouldn't start kicking off and ending his marriage over a little flirting.

"andy" · 14 Dec 2008 at 15:16

she could have genuinly just not changed it from single to married. i know a good few people whos info on facebook etc is really old yet they add an occasional picture. theyre all technology retards mind

Scythe · 14 Dec 2008 at 15:27

VNC the computer whilst shes on MSN?

Mik3 · 14 Dec 2008 at 15:30

Instead of spying and paranioa I suggest you talk to her and let her know your uncomfortable with it, ask her if its just flirting or is there a problem with the relationship, everyone has these same issues.

Sanguinnus · 14 Dec 2008 at 15:44

keylogger, i'd say her behaviour so far has warranted it, if you find nothing say nothing and it's all good! You get peice of mind and maybe that will help move things forward. If you do unearth something it's probably for the best that you know considering she's blatantly undermining the family structure you have built together.

Cybermyk · 14 Dec 2008 at 16:59

http://www.relate.org.uk/

Morba · 14 Dec 2008 at 17:29

Mik3 said:
Probably not, but we all do it, its part of our genetics.

As said its probably just flirting. He shouldn't start kicking off and ending his marriage over a little flirting.

No, not everyone does it.
And its not genetics, its called not having something in your life that you want but not being able to talk to your partner about it.

gareth.e · 14 Dec 2008 at 17:43

Scythe said:
VNC the computer whilst shes on MSN?

That would be awesome..

fini · 14 Dec 2008 at 17:46

not that awesome when you see your best mates willy

AtaRo · 14 Dec 2008 at 18:00

fini said:
not that awesome when you see your best mates willy

LOL

Mik3 · 14 Dec 2008 at 18:01

Morba said:
No, not everyone does it.
And its not genetics, its called not having something in your life that you want but not being able to talk to your partner about it.

So where not programed to spread our genes? I think you will find just like ever other species on the planet we are.

revolutionrock · 14 Dec 2008 at 18:09

Perhaps ring a friend of hers and ask about her Facebook page>

Angilion · 15 Dec 2008 at 03:56

RumbleBee said:
Thanks for the replies.

Rgarding forgetting to update, she's updated other things, such as 1 picture from a recent concert she went to.

No webcam. She does have a knack of quickly closing Messenger down when she's on the PC upstairs and when I walk between rooms. Noticed this a few times.

Kinda crazy, but since I posted this original message I've just received an email saying her Friends Re-united page has been updated. Suddenly she is now married and those pictures in question are gone.

My main concern now is to make sure the children dont have a bad Christmas, but honestly I just feel like leaving for a bit. Only down the road though as my mam lives close. Saying that I know I wont. We're supposed to be going to the works christmas party on Tuesday too.

In her words 'You're snooping has caused all this', sure knows how to lay the guilt trip on. I wasnt snooping. I got an email about somone else's update, which took me to the site. Dont even use the site.

It seems pretty clear to me that your wife doesn't like you. You're not guilty for her deceit. Bear that in mind - it's not your fault. She's trying to mess with your head, to make you feel at fault and thus easier to control. She'll probably succeed in time.

Imagine that you were having an affair and checking into hotels with your mistress as your wife. Your wife then receives some sort of special offer from the hotel she stayed at...but of course it wasn't her. She phones the hotel, who confirm that she booked a room there a couple of months ago, with you. Except, of course, that it wasn't her - it was your mistress. So...would that make your affair all your wife's fault?

I'm glad I'm not in your shoes. You can remain married to someone you can't trust, who tries to get you to accept blame for their actions, who's probably cheating on you in some way and who doesn't seem to even like you. Or you can lose your home and your children.

Solari · 15 Dec 2008 at 04:49

If she isn't tech savvy then definitely go the keylogger route, even though it's a really horrible thing to do. It'll either show you something you don't want to see, or it will make you feel a prat for not trusting her - hence making you want to fix things up.

DampCat · 15 Dec 2008 at 08:36

Goodness. Don't people just talk to each other anymore? It's pretty obvious she's up to something. Chances are, that something isn't a big deal. Maybe she just flirts with people to make her feel good about herself. You might say it's because you don't show her enough attention, or maybe it's just something she enjoys.

You need to talk to her, whilst she's being honest. Trying to catch her out then saying "look what i found when you didn't know you were being watched" isn't the way to do it, in my opinion.

Oh and for the record, i'm not dating any of you lot now i know you're so quick to log my keys!