Ladies - Please stay out

how-to-bake.gif


:p
 
Which is the odd one out?

A woman, a Washing Machine, a Toaster, an Iron, a Dishwasher and a Freezer?

Answer: A Toaster, all the others leak when they're ****ed.
 
"I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back." -- Henny Youngman

"When a woman marries again it is because she detested her first husband. When a man marries again it is because he adored his first wife. Women try their luck; men risk theirs." -- Oscar Wilde

"My toughest fight was with my first wife." -- Muhammad Ali

"The difference between divorce and legal separation is that a legal separation gives a husband time to hide his money." -- Johnny Carson

"Married men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing to die." -- Johnny Carson

"Ah, yes, divorce...from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet." -- Robin Williams

"I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and by then it was too late." -- Max Kaufman

And a few pics



Can't believe this one hasn't been posted yet!

 
Kaed said:
"I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back." -- Henny Youngman

"When a woman marries again it is because she detested her first husband. When a man marries again it is because he adored his first wife. Women try their luck; men risk theirs." -- Oscar Wilde

"My toughest fight was with my first wife." -- Muhammad Ali

"The difference between divorce and legal separation is that a legal separation gives a husband time to hide his money." -- Johnny Carson

"Married men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing to die." -- Johnny Carson

"Ah, yes, divorce...from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet." -- Robin Williams

"I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and by then it was too late." -- Max Kaufman

And a few pics



Can't believe this one hasn't been posted yet!

Click to expand...

Pure win!:D
 
Kaed said:
"I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back." -- Henny Youngman

"When a woman marries again it is because she detested her first husband. When a man marries again it is because he adored his first wife. Women try their luck; men risk theirs." -- Oscar Wilde

"My toughest fight was with my first wife." -- Muhammad Ali

"The difference between divorce and legal separation is that a legal separation gives a husband time to hide his money." -- Johnny Carson

"Married men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing to die." -- Johnny Carson

"Ah, yes, divorce...from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet." -- Robin Williams

"I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and by then it was too late." -- Max Kaufman

And a few pics



Can't believe this one hasn't been posted yet!

Click to expand...

"Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours."

LOL
 
A highway patrolman pulled up alongside a speeding car on the freeway. As the officer peered through the driver's window, he was astounded to find that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting. The trooper cranked down his window and yelled to the driver, "Pull over!" at the top of his lungs. "No!" the blonde yelled back, "Scarf!"
 
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