GFs Religion

Settleddown

Settleddown

Settleddown

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I have being together with my girlfriend now for nearly 2 years were in love and all the rest of it but today have being told something.

Ok she goes and sees here grandmother every Sunday morning and Wednesday night with her mum dad and sister, I thought it was just to have dinner and spend family time together but no apparently they have a secret Christian meeting signing hymns reading the bible and other related tasks, I though fair enough she was scared to tell me as I thought it will put me off, I asked is it just you lot and she said no there we are part of a Christian family with people over the world in America Ireland and Europe, she went away to Ireland and Preston a few times last year to see friends and family but told me just now it was to take part in a Christian family gathering.

At this point I’m like wth? Massive secret to keep from me and I don’t know what to think, I had no idea she was a massive Christian let alone religious.
I don’t know how to approach this situation, would you lot just carry on as normal? She also said its the ‘law’ of the Christian Family to marry into each other and her mum pushes her to see a few people, she is 21 I’m kind of shocked by it all.


Sorry for the life story and hope it makes sense :)
 
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mmj_uk said:
So assuming you aren't a hardcore Christian do you have any future with her? is she planning to convert you or what?
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She believes we have a future together and is only interested in me; there is no way I’m being converted into something I do not believe in not a chance, I told here that. She is upset that I told her telling me this changes everything and she started crying on the phone saying she doesn’t want to loose me.

I’m just shocked to say the least, didn’t have a clue at all.
 
Could you seriously be bothered with all that crap ???

You will have to convert and get into it or Drag her out of it which could be considered as slightly wrong.

Do you love her enough to "discover Jesus" etc..
 
Dress up as a monkey and start jumping around her family shouting "WE WERE THESE ONCE"

.... ok joking apart, you have to sit down and talk to her about wether there is any future in the both of you being together especially if her family aren't going to like the fact your not religous

EDIT: oh from your last post you already have, ignore the second part and just do the first then :p
 
It looks like you won't have a future together. Her life is not the same as yours, and they're totally incompatible. Sorry dude.
 
If you really feel that strongly against it, aren't really willing to try and understand things, maybe even share some aspects of this to make family life for her a little better then maybe it's time to realise you're not right for each other and call it a day?

I guess she told you because she wants to see if you can accept this part of her life, if you can't then what else can you do?
 
Settleddown said:
I have being with my girlfriend now for nearly 2 years were in love and all the rest of it but today have being told something.

Ok she goes and sees here grandmother every Sunday morning and Wednesday night with her mum dad and sister, I thought it was just to have dinner and spend family time together but no apparently they have a major secret Christian meeting signing hims reading the bible and other related tasks, I though fair enough she was scared to tell me as I thought it will put me off, I asked is it just you lot and she said no there is a Christian family we have with people over the world in America Ireland and Europe, she went away to Ireland and Preston a few times last year to see friend but told me just now it was to take part in a Christian family gathering.

At this point I’m like wth????? Massive secret to keep from me and I don’t know what to think, I had no idea she was a massive Christian let alone religious.
I don’t know how to approach this situation, would you lot just carry on as normal? She also said its the ‘law’ of the Christian Family to marry into each other and her mum pushes her to see a few people, she is 21 I’m kindof shocked by it all.


Sorry for the life story and hope it makes sense :)
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It seriously sounds like she is in a cult. :eek:
 
You've been together 2 years and you hadn't talked about your respective beliefs?
 
You've got no future with her.

As you said, you don't believe in religious rubbish, so how can you be with a woman who believes in such stuff?
 
Messy situation, having different religious beliefs is not in itself a problem, but the parents, and any desire to 'convert' on either side could change that dramatically.

Communication is key, you need to sit down and both get everything out in the open before you can make any sort of informed decision about how things are going to proceed, or indeed whether there is any possibility to proceed.
 
Tom0 said:
If you really feel that strongly against it, aren't really willing to try and understand things, maybe even share some aspects of this to make family life for her a little better then maybe it's time to realise you're not right for each other and call it a day?

I guess she told you because she wants to see if you can accept this part of her life, if you can't then what else can you do?
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Thanks for this, very much appreciated :)



I totally respect her for telling me and would never get her to change who she is, I’m just shocked it’s being kept a secret for so long :(

So many question to ask her about this so called ‘Christian family’

Yeah I said it was basically a cult and she just shouted saying 'I knew you would laugh'

No we have never talked about religion and she has never brought up any religious subjects so I didn’t have any idea she was.
 
Settleddown said:
I have being with my girlfriend now for nearly 2 years were in love and all the rest of it but today have being told something.

Ok she goes and sees here grandmother every Sunday morning and Wednesday night with her mum dad and sister, I thought it was just to have dinner and spend family time together but no apparently they have a major secret Christian meeting signing hims reading the bible and other related tasks, I though fair enough she was scared to tell me as I thought it will put me off, I asked is it just you lot and she said no there is a Christian family we have with people over the world in America Ireland and Europe, she went away to Ireland and Preston a few times last year to see friend but told me just now it was to take part in a Christian family gathering.

At this point I’m like wth????? Massive secret to keep from me and I don’t know what to think, I had no idea she was a massive Christian let alone religious.
I don’t know how to approach this situation, would you lot just carry on as normal? She also said its the ‘law’ of the Christian Family to marry into each other and her mum pushes her to see a few people, she is 21 I’m kindof shocked by it all.


Sorry for the life story and hope it makes sense :)
Click to expand...

She is probably not a massive christian but after the upbringing feels the need to keep face with her parents and other people from that life... theres a lot here that most people who have no experience of it will NOT understand - I don't mean to be arrogant.

There are a number of christian groups in the UK/World... but it sounds like one or other faction of the exclusive brethren or a break away faction... I hope not in "The Jimmies" as this can potentially make things complicated.
 
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