GFs Religion

[Thunderbolt]

Eh? Two year relationship - devout Christian girlfriend, no sex before marriage surely?

This makes no sense to me.

On a serious note, it sounds like fun. My parents like to have a family get together at Christmas, does that mean I'm in a cult???

 

[Glaucus]

a part that you will be required to join if you stay with her.

 

[Stag]

Why run away.

Anybody who believes that dinosaurs were buried to test our faith is not someone I would want to breed with personally, even if they were perfect in every other way.

If such an obviously fallacy can be believed then it earmarks problems down the line.

You just go your religious I'm not. You go to church, I'll stay at home. It has not affected the relationship for 2 years and many many other couples get on with it fine.

Indeed of course a mixed-faith marriage can work fine, but I'm talking about young earth creationism that is easily discounted through science. Anyone who can believe that shows so much irrationality I would have no hope in.

 

[Settleddown]

She isn’t a devout Christian, where have I said that? She seems to be going through the phase of leaving that behind and starting a life with me, well I hope so

 

[Glaucus]

young earth creationism that is easily discounted through science. .

Totally different debate.. Science is a framework, it is not the truth. Many people do not hold your opinion. Why give up true happiness just because they belie one small thing.

 

[Thunderbolt]

She isn’t a devout Christian, where have I said that? She seems to be going through the phase of leaving that behind and starting a life with me, well I hope so

Then all is well. Make sure she knows this though (and her parents if they have money).

To be fair in all relationships you have to leave things behind. For me, ready meals, I love them, but the girlfriend doesn't, and I bet I would spend more time eating ready meals than your girlfriend would on her knees... in prayer

edit: + love the irony of your name

 

[Stag]

Totally different debate.. Science is a framework, it is not the truth. Many people do not hold your opinion. Why give up true happiness just because they belie one small thing.

Indeed, I am not blinded by science, I know it has its holes. But and its a big fat hairy butt because it should be plainly obvious that the Earth is more than 6000 years old, or whatever ridiculous number they came up with. I honestly couldn't live happily with someone who holds such a diametrically opposed (and demonstrably wrong) opinion.

 

[Angilion]

What exactly is the difference then....

Depends on the definition used:

Definition number one:

A cult is a baseless system of belief and obedience to orders that the speaker does not approve of, whereas a faith is a baseless system of belief and obedience to orders that the speaker does approve of.

Definition number two:

A cult is a baseless system of belief and obedience to orders which relatively few people follow, whereas a faith is a baseless system of belief and obedience to orders that relatively many people follow.

 

[Maximum Triceratops]

No bum sex for you then.

 

[Settleddown]

Then all is well. Make sure she knows this though (and her parents if they have money).

To be fair in all relationships you have to leave things behind. For me, ready meals, I love them, but the girlfriend doesn't, and I bet I would spend more time eating ready meals than your girlfriend would on her knees... in prayer

edit: + love the irony of your name

Me too I don’t quite live up to my name just yet. I think I have found the perfect one if that does not sound too cliché, but I will make sure religion will not get in the way.

Like I say it was just the initial shock of the whole thing!!

 

[Thunderbolt]

No Christians that I know believe that Dinosaur remains were implanted into the earth. However, if you ask why they are there; then they will say how they are planted there by God to remind us of Hell, or something along those lines. It's a symbology thing, as is the entire bible.

If you think that all Christians believe god put bones in the ground you are as ridiculous as the few Christians that actually do.

 

[Sankari]

Ok she goes and sees here grandmother every Sunday morning and Wednesday night with her mum dad and sister, I thought it was just to have dinner and spend family time together but no apparently they have a secret Christian meeting signing hymns reading the bible and other related tasks

What do you mean by "secret Christian meeting"? In what way is it secret? You do know that it's perfectly normal for Christians to attend church several times a week, right? Many Christian churches also have international fellowship camps and conferences. There's nothing sinister about this.

There are a number of Christian groups around the world that teach it is a sin to marry non-believers. (Remember that plenty of non-Christian religions teach this as well!) From their perspective it makes sense, because a marriage of that type could lead to all sorts of problems (as you're obviously finding out). But very few of them will be hardcore about it; most will consider it a "sin" which can nevertheless be forgiven, so there could be no long term difficulties.

Ok she DOES not go to church, she has them in a house around a table like a cult, its more then the normal Christian Sunday in a church meeting.

Er, there's nothing uniquely "cultish" about meeting in a house around a table. It's very common for small Christian groups to do this when they don't have a large number of members in their area. In fact, the original 1st Century Christians often met in each other's houses.

I suggest you ask her what her group is called and look it up on Wikipedia.

 

[Settleddown]

No bum sex for you then.

Dont know about you but I have a girlfriend not boyfriend!

 

[Thunderbolt]

Dont know about you but I have a girlfriend not boyfriend!

Hahaha quoted for truth!

 

[Efour]

After some thought and with the limited info you provided about it all im going to stick with my original statement.

She is obviously ashamed and wants to possibly escapee - you can/will provide that.

You will never be accepted by her family / religious community unless you convert - they will whisper behind your GFs back about her and her heathen lover.

That or its just over hype

 

[4T5]

She isn’t a devout Christian, where have I said that? She seems to be going through the phase of leaving that behind and starting a life with me, well I hope so

Watch out for those Pesky Lions.

 

[Rroff]

I think so to Hehe some seriously excellent advice in here so many thanks to those who have helped, Rroff is the main man!!

I guess it took a lot for her to tell me and I imagine its a huge weight off her shoulder.

Trying to be helpful but a lot of this happened in my life when I was ~11 and I'm 28 now heh... so I'm prolly making some big assumptions.

I had a thought tho... a lot of what you see as lies - to her is probably self preservation.

I don't know the details of the group her parents are with but many of them forbid television, radio, going to the cinema, socialising with non-christians is discouraged, etc. as a kid when your friends are talking about say brad pitt how stupid do you look if you say "who?" - you don't tell your friends you can't play with them on a wednesday night coz your off to a prayer meeting... from an early age you gloss over it, bluff or even lie - some of it might be a bit more accepted in todays multi cultural/multi faith Britain - but in the 80s and 90s and probably before it would generally result in humiliation.

I'm probably making some big assumptions but if I'm right hopefully that will give you some idea of where shes coming from and how big a step in regards to a relationship this is for her.

 

[Glaucus]

Er, there's nothing uniquely "cultish" about meeting in a house around a table. It's very common for small Christian groups to do this when they don't have a large number of members in their area. In fact, the original 1st Century Christians often met in each other's houses.

I suggest you ask her what her group is called and look it up on Wikipedia.

It might also not be a group and they might be some of the few Christians who don't follow leadership religions and just read the bible on their own and make up there own decisions.

I know a fair few people who although go to church do not believe what the church does and only go by what they read in the bible. The church for them is simply a place for discussion on the subject.

 

[Angilion]

Roll your eyes all you like, but here's something that will help you avoid looking foolish:

Read the relevant posts. She's told him that it's part of the deal - she's expected to marry within the sect, which means that her husband will have to join.

 

[Settleddown]

Trying to be helpful but a lot of this happened in my life when I was ~11 and I'm 28 now heh... so I'm prolly making some big assumptions.

I had a thought tho... a lot of what you see as lies to her is probably self preservation.

I don't know the details of the group her parents are with but many of them forbid television, radio, going to the cinema, socialising with non-christians is discouraged, etc. as a kid when your friends are talking about say brad pitt how stupid do you look if you say "who?" - you don't tell your friends you can't play with them on a wednesday night coz your off to a prayer meeting... from an early age you gloss over it, bluff or even lie - some of it might be a bit more accepted in todays multi cultural/multi faith Britain - but in the 80s and 90s and probably before it would generally result in humiliation.

I'm probably making some big assumptions but if I'm right hopefully that will give you some idea of where shes coming from and how big a step in regards to a relationship this is for her.

You know they have no TV or radio in the house!!! I though this was quite strange but makes sense now thinking about it