Do we all aspire to marriage/kids?

shifty_uk

shifty_uk

shifty_uk

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Thread inspired by a conversation my GF had with her boss.

Been together for years and we're both on the same level when it comes to the above. Both think marriage is just a meaningless peace of paper and an overpriced event, money which could be best spent elsewhere. Both can't stand kids and don't want them. At least not anytime soon.

However, her boss took it upon herself to somewhat belittle her infront of colleagues stating 'you don't want kids? You're clearly not with the right person then.' and a lengthy conversation ensued about how we're not right for each other, etc.

Hasn't been the first time right enough. Everyone seems rather gob smacked when I say I don't have any near intentions of marrying or very little to no intentions of having kids, at least not in my mind right now.

Discuss :D
 
At the moment my intention is to be financially secure. Maybe kids and marriage will be on the cards 10 years from now but it's not something I'm actively working towards.
 
I don't want kids or to be married, might consider a pagan or other method but essentially, no. I think your GF's boss had a opinionated and / or judgemental moment by the sounds of it.
 
In a word, no.

But I'll also say that if you don't want to marry the person you're with, you don't love them enough.

Children are another matter. I have no interest in them at all and never have. My gf feels the same.
 
I'm married, but I would have happily just been with my Wife without getting married. To me it's a waste of time but she wanted to do it, so we did it.

Had an awesome day though, so it wasn't all bad :)

As for kids, I've always wanted them and find it strange when people do not as I feel it's a huge part of life, but then not everyone is the same so I don't judge.

One of my best friends never wants kids or to get married either.
 
Do not want marriage and do not want kids at all. Can see why some people do but they need to get it into there heads not everyone does.
 
I certainly did, but some folks are apathetic to the idea. As far as I know, genetically speaking we are driven, as are all animals, to procreate, for one reason or another that drive may be missing or subdued in some.

As I say , it was certainly an aim and hope of mine from quite a young age, I had friends who insisted they would never marry and/or have kids. One of those just last year ended up finally getting married and having a kid, lasted into his 40s before he finally decided he did want it (luckily his wife is younger than him so it wasn't too late for him on the kid front) , another friend who is towards his 50s is finally getting married this year, though he has now left it too late for children, something which he now regrets. Another friend is still unmarried and without kids and in his mid 40s now. I guess we all make different choices.
 
I think to say you 'definately NEVER want kids' is to misunderstand your capacity to change.

When I got my driving license age 17 I didn't tick the 'up to 250cc motorbike' box even though it was completely free, easy to do, required NO extra test, you never HAD to have a motorbike, I selected 'don't want it on my license' .. I just thought 'I am NEVER going to ride a motorbike'.

Now I have a 675cc monster!!

You will change. Never say never ..
 
I am getting married 16th of next month and couldn't be happier, but when it comes to kids we are not having any. We both were not fussed either way but due to a couple of medical issue with my misses if she had one it would likely kill her in the process so that pretty much ruled them out!

As for the wedding it is only a small thing, neither of us wanted to have any debt left to pay after the day so have stuck hard to the budget. There is no point in making life hard for years for the sake of one day.
 
I used to say that I wouldnt get married or have kids, I am now married with 2 kids, the wedding day was one of the best days of my life and my two kids are my favorite thing in the world.
Each to their own of course but I reckon one would regret later in life never having kids.
 
I can agree on Marriage but I want kid's sometime, though not until I'm older than 30.

If I'm honest, I'd rather take a 3 week holiday somewhere nice than get married.
 
britboy4321 said:
I think to say you 'definately NEVER want kids' is to misunderstand your capacity to change.

When I got my driving license age 17 I didn't tick the 'up to 250cc motorbike' box even though it was completely free, easy to do, required NO extra test, you never HAD to have a motorbike, I selected 'don't want it on my license' .. I just thought 'I am NEVER going to ride a motorbike'.

Now I have a 675cc monster!!

You will change. Never say never ..
Click to expand...

I must admit that the friend that I feel most sorry for is the one who left it too late for kids and now regrets it. The other two (the one who got married eventually and had a kid, and the one who is still without any and happy) are very happy and I have nothing but happiness for them.
 
I feel the same, although i am only 20 but still! I could not imagine having kids plus i am too selfish too, over 200k to raise a child to 20! :eek:
 
I'm only 21 and I know that at some stage in the future I would love to have a wife and kids. I can see how it is not for everyone, especially due to the way work patterns, society and life in general are these days. For me though, I come from a strong family background and I want my own one day.
 
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