Do you go to church if you dont believe in God?

The only problem I have with religion is the god thing. The rest seems like a decent enough idea for developing and reinforcing the community values we all need to survive. Or at least we did before we decided councils and "someone else" would worry about that kind of thing while we browse internet forums, watch telly, and complain about council tax. :-)

So in theory at least I'd be comfortable with visiting churches. In practice though I've avoided such situations by being uncomfortable in any friendship with a Believer. So I have kind of side-stepped the issue.

I suppose, to answer the question... if you love someone enough you'll support them in their hobbies, even if their hobby is praying to imaginary friends. It might help to see their god as something created from the shared experience of coming together; something bigger than the sum of its parts. And to an extent that is true. A community brought together for any reason -- whether that's an army, a football crowd, or a congregation -- is able to achieve things which individuals can't.

So consider it to be a potential networking opportunity. Just be honest but polite on religious matters unless you find their beliefs offensive. It all depends upon the nature of the church really. There's not much to be offended by in Modern CofE practice, but some of the feistier churches are closer to the lunatic fringe than any sane atheist should tread.

Having said that, there are worse things than being extremely religious. If someone ever says "I'm not religious, but I am spiritual" run a mile. ;-)
 
Worst 'I'm trying to get my new Christian girlfriend to sleep with me' thread.

That's how things work around these parts isn't it??
 
No. I wouldn't go. I'd be all happy for my girlfriend to go if it makes her happy etc etc etc.

But after I explain that I don't believe in god I wouldn't want it forced upon me.
 
Castiel said:
Obviously there is a certain amount of religous hoohaa, such a singing a hymn or saying a prayer....simply do what I do and use the time to think of how you are going to solve that Skyrim puzzle or something....
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The one thing I miss about Primary School, back in the depths of the late 60s & early 70's, is a good sing-song. The good old fashioned hymns (rather than the weird new ones I never recognise when I see them sung on TV) have cracking tunes, and it's rare to have an opportunity to sing with enough people that your own failings are hidden in the din. :-)

I suppose I should go to football matches, but then I'd have to take an interest in football, which would be almost as bad as having to deal with the god thing.
 
Just do what you want to do, mutual respect and all that, let her know that she can go to church all she wants and you'll not stop her but you don't believe in god so won't want to go yourself.

I go along to weddings, funerals etc. but usually end up looking around at the architecture rather than following the service. I certainly wouldn't go along to a normal Sunday service.

TommyV said:
The irony, a church thread, and a scientist in your sig who beleived in god.
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He was a deist though wasn't he? not necessarily a Christian or involved with organised religion. I seem to remember him saying he believed in a greater being but it doesn't involve itself in the workings of the universe and hasn't since its creation.
 
It depends on the church. If it's like the one my family goes to, it'll be an hour of a vaguely amusing sermon, a few easy hymns and a touch of praying. There's no compulsion to 'feel' anything or do anything. It's more about a group of people getting together every week to meet and socialize.
 
I dunno, I find just being around people praying makes me feel like I've just entered a mental institution.
 
Like Every single Question concerning Women I'll answer the same - Depends how fit she is. :D
 
Surfer said:
Ok your girlfriend wants you to go to church with her on a weekly basis (sundays possibly more)

Your argument is you dont believe in God so why go to church?

Her argument is that i should go to support her and its a family event (her family all go to church and most of her friends from church)- you dont have to believe in God. Its something she loves and is a big part of her life which she wants to share with you.


Do you go and tolerate it? Or not?

It kinda feels that she would want a boyfriend who believes in God but if he doesnt then she would try to convince him (constantly!) to go to church and then he would believe in God etc
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Going to Church won't invalidate your beliefs in any way. Your girlfriend will feel supported.

Do you do anything else to support her that you wouldn't do of your own volition?

If she was asking you to convert I could see some sort of moral conundrum. Accompanying her to church on a regular basis in no way compromises your beliefs.
 
It will cause issues either way, if you lie and go then when it comes out you don't believe you've been lieing or if you say you won't go and don't believe.

Stick to your guns and say (as I did with a ex's mother) it is personal and would hypocritcal for you to lie and go to something you don't/can't believe in.
 
I would go. but i do other things on sunday mornings, so i wouldnt be able to go anyway.


My mum sometimes goes to church despite not believing in God/religion.
She says that she likes the songs and the stories* that the minister tells, also it's the same church she went to when she was young so there are lots of people there who she knows and likes to chat to.

*I'm not saying that religion is all made up 'stories' (although thats what i believe), the minister actually makes anecdotal stories which tie in with the bible apparently.
 
Depends how much trouble you want to cause. doesn't it?
You could just shut up and go along or risk causing arguments.
I normally do everything my gf asks me.

Surfer said:
Ok your girlfriend wants you to go to church with her on a weekly basis (sundays possibly more)

Your argument is you dont believe in God so why go to church?

Her argument is that i should go to support her and its a family event (her family all go to church and most of her friends from church)- you dont have to believe in God. Its something she loves and is a big part of her life which she wants to share with you.


Do you go and tolerate it? Or not?

It kinda feels that she would want a boyfriend who believes in God but if he doesnt then she would try to convince him (constantly!) to go to church and then he would believe in God etc
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You don't have to believe in God to go to church no, there's no more hypocrisy in doing so than going to a pub if you don't drink. It boils down to how much you love and respect your partner imho. If she wants support in something that she holds dear and you have difficulty putting that before your own pride or principles then the bigger question really needs to be asked.

It of course depends on the type of Church you end up attending, I personally really felt/feel uncomfortable in the overly happy clappy ones that are populated by people who seem to want to out "spirit" each other.

I speak from experience on this as I was in an almost identical situation 10 years ago and thankfully we settled in Nottingham Vineyard which would probably shock peoples conceptions of what exactly a Church is (it has a licensed bar for example). After 10 years I remain on the fence but I utterly applaud the work that, that Church does for Nottingham.
 
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Invite her to an orgy, on the pretence that she's there to support all those involved, she doesn't have to enjoy it, just support you and your life choices...

:P
 
Gilly said:
Nope, I would not.

I will go to church and pay my respects in the event of loss of life. I will go to church and give my blessing through my presence in the event of a Christening or Wedding.

I certainly wouldn't go on a consistent basis.
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Same.
 
LOAM said:
You don't have to believe in God to go to church no, there's no more hypocrisy in doing so than going to a pub if you don't drink. It boils down to how much you love and respect your partner imho. If she wants support in something that she holds dear and you have difficulty putting that before your own pride or principles then the bigger question really needs to be asked.
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I think this is pretty much on the button.

If this is such a big issue for the OP then he really needs to ask is he going out with the right person?
 
depends if it was a long term girlfriend, then no. Foot down with that one straight away.

If I was trying to keep her happy so I could get in her pants, then yes.
 
Surfer said:
Ok your girlfriend wants you to go to church with her on a weekly basis (sundays possibly more)

Your argument is you dont believe in God so why go to church?

Her argument is that i should go to support her and its a family event (her family all go to church and most of her friends from church)- you dont have to believe in God. Its something she loves and is a big part of her life which she wants to share with you.


Do you go and tolerate it? Or not?

It kinda feels that she would want a boyfriend who believes in God but if he doesnt then she would try to convince him (constantly!) to go to church and then he would believe in God etc
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Get her dumped. Silly cow.
 
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