How to settle money dispute between (former) friends?

Terminal_Boy said:
Your GF will never see that money.

Tell her to write it off to experience and break all contact with the former friend.
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Yep, she's never getting it back, not after 3 years. Write it off to experience. Up to her whether she winds up the friendship as well. I wouldn't blame her if she did.
 
This is why you should always have a written agreement with the terms of the loan if you insist on helping a friend... Better yet don't mix friends with finances, no repayment = loss of friendship

I've seen it far too many times where friends have a casual arrangement which basically means say bye to your money when it goes sour

Looks like a suck it up, lesson learned scenario to me
 
Is it enough money to be worth the cost and hassle of a court case? She'll have to pay a fee to bring the case to court and there will be some cost in money and/or her time to pursue the case. How much time and money would gathering the evidence and presenting it at a court hearing cost her?

Here's a snippet from the official page that makes the importance of doing everything right very clear:

If you leave the ‘amount claimed’ blank, the fee is £10,000.
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If she goes down that route, she'd better be very sure she's filled everything in correctly.

Then there's the possibility of more fees in addition to the fee you have to pay up front when making the claim:

You may have to pay more fees later on - for example, if there’s a court hearing or you need to get a judgment enforced.
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Then there are some more possible fees:

[..]
The court may send you a questionnaire asking for more information on the case.
If your claim is under £10,000, you’ll be asked if you’d like to use the court’s small claims mediation service to reach an agreement with the defendant.
Fill in the questionnaire and return it to the court. You’ll have to pay an extra court fee.
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Of course, that's assuming she represents herself in a hearing. A lawyer would cost extra, probably a lot extra. Oh, and there's a fee for using the mediation service too.

She might be able to get her costs added to the debt and she might get those costs back. Or some of them. Or none of them. That will be up to the judge. Either way, she'll have to pay those costs up front.

https://www.gov.uk/make-court-claim-for-money

It sounds like a clear case, since she has evidence of the other person admitting to the debt and agreeing to repay it. But is it worth the time, money and hassle of a court case?
 
How much are we talking, money lent to friends should be written off at the time of the loan never expect to get it back, if you do great but sadly most people don't repay and you learn this after the first or second time of lending money out.
 
if it is a few hundred AND she's doesn't earn much AND she has free time then I don't think the small claims route is a waste

ditto to simply if she's really put out by it and wants to claim back out of principle

markomania said:
This is why you should always have a written agreement with the terms of the loan if you insist on helping a friend... Better yet don't mix friends with finances, no repayment = loss of friendship
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I'm not really sure that would change much - she'd still need to take the same route to claim back the money - the OP states she has evidence (e-mails/texts relating to the debt) so it isn't like that is lacking
 
Kidnap her. Return her. State that if debt isn't paid, next time the "holiday" will be permanent, as she seems to like free holidays.
 
samcat said:
BUT be warned, if you share friends then this move might make you look like a bit of a knob.
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If they share friends then I'd hope that the other person who owes the money already looks like a knob and frankly one of the mutual friends ought to help sort it out thus avoiding all this small claims stuff

Avenged7Fold said:
As others have said, she should write it off and cut ties.

The ag with mutual friends is not worth the effort of proper action.
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I don't see why there would be aggro with mutual friends - if the two people already don't like each other and the debt exists then the issue between them already exists

unless you're suggesting that they reconcile and the gf just forgets about it

taking action as a result of the debt doesn't change anything in that friendship context - the two people still dislike each other and there is still an 'issue' between them
 
dowie said:
I don't see why there would be aggro with mutual friends - if the two people already don't like each other and the debt exists then the issue between them already exists
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If they are willing to not pay a friend back after borrowing money, then i would imagine they have no issue telling a lie to mutual friends to make them seem like they needn't pay back or to villainise the lender.

The ideal situation would be to confront them and make them pay it back but if OP gf is getting stressed about the situation as it is and they share mutual friends, its easy to see how OP gf could become more stressed if she took some sort of formal action against the borrower. What if the borrower finds a way to alienate the lender. If they have already fallen out of friends and she refuses to pay it back, i wouldn't put it passed them.
 
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