Anyone else just bimble along through life?

Telecaster · 23 Sep 2019 at 19:49

Is anyone else in this boat? I don't seem to have any ideas, plans or much in the way of interests, I just seem to bimble along not doing much really aside from going to work, housework and sleep. I emailed the boss last week asking how many of my 20 days holiday I had left for the year as I can't remember taking any and I have 16 left to use before Christmas or I lose them, can't for the life of me think of anything to do, I'll probably end up pottering around the house for a couple of weeks.

I've always seemed to be this way about everything, I'm so laid back and don't take a single thing seriously or care about much at all to be honest. I'm just a bit worried that when it comes to an end I'll look back and regret it.

Rroff · 23 Sep 2019 at 19:53

I do far too often - I think it stems from not having a clear vision from start to end on things I don't have experience of and not one to jump into something blind.

Uther · 23 Sep 2019 at 19:53

Get a cheap flight and go visit a foreign country.You're wasting your life. I'm in my 50's now with health issues, so much closer to the end than the beginning, and certainly wished I had been a lot more adventurous when I was younger.

Telecaster · 23 Sep 2019 at 19:55

Uther said:
Get a cheap flight and go visit a foreign country.You're wasting your life.

I don't have a passport, but I get your point.

I like the idea of these things in theory but then when start to think about the hassle involved I just can't be arsed.

sideways14a · 23 Sep 2019 at 20:00

I am similar, i have zero interest in going abroad and seeing other countries which is why i aint been off this island since i was 16 or so and i dont like bright sunshine or heat so i aint ever going to sit on a beach.
I did go round scotland last year for a week or so, stayed up around lochness and a few other places, when i was speaking to a chap selling tickets for the castle he was surprised to hear i only live a hundred or so miles away

This year aint been too interesting other than seeing a lot of the inside of our new hospital and having had 6 months off lol.. still thats now nearly over so... back to working on stuff that interests me... technology.

Steeps · 23 Sep 2019 at 20:02

Done exactly the same, been too busy at work the thought of taking more than a couple of days off and then having to catch up with the days off feels less productive than plodding along at a steady rate so I'll often fit things I need to do around extended lunch hours. Last year had to cover maternity so I was allowed to roll over any unused holiday to this year, but now I seem to have 40 days to use up by Christmas. Impulse bought a flat to move to but again I can slowly move in to it during evenings/weekends... that's taken over any funds I would have had for a holiday abroad if I wanted to actually go somewhere.

MissChief · 23 Sep 2019 at 20:05

Telecaster said:
I don't have a passport, but I get your point.

I like the idea of these things in theory but then when start to think about the hassle involved I just can't be arsed.

So what interests you? Go to Wales. Or Scotland. Visit a few museums. Get out of the house and do something!

wesimmo · 23 Sep 2019 at 20:05

As I get older I find myself less bothered about all the pressure of modern expectations.

So much so I took a 20% pay cut earlier this year and still feel like giving up the corporate tread mill and buying a small cafe to run.

I don't want a big house, not a massive fan of flying anyway and am happy knocking around in my second hand hot hatches and the kit car I'm building. Aside from wanting make sure my daughter is looked after I really can't be bothered with burning both ends of the candle and filling my life with commitments any more.

FISHGUTS · 23 Sep 2019 at 20:13

wesimmo said:
As I get older I find myself less bothered about all the pressure of modern expectations.

So much so I took a 20% pay cut earlier this year and still feel like giving up the corporate tread mill and buying a small cafe to run.

I don't want a big house, not a massive fan of flying anyway and am happy knocking around in my second hand hot hatches and the kit car I'm building. Aside from wanting make sure my daughter is looked after I really can't be bothered with burning both ends of the candle and filling my life with commitments any more.

Don't get a cafe for an easy life. It's not the droid your looking for.
I have one, it's very, very hard work. & not at all what your dreams will be imho.

Pawnless Endgame · 23 Sep 2019 at 20:16

Weird one this. I think it's called a "mid life crisis"? It's when you're in your 40s like I am, cottoned on that you're now middle-aged and haven't achieved much yet.

My biggest issue is romance or lack of. I had a couple of girlfriends when I was younger but nothing on this side of year 2000. I did all of the right things like going clubbing on a weekly basis. I still go out a couple of times a week now (pub + café) with friends but still no luck. I know what my target is though - someone who would be mad on Disney. I went to the Paris resort as a 40th birthday present last year and the family took me there. It's not their cuppa tea though, so I would need to find a soulmate to go again in future. The same applies to the big American resorts. Facebook still confuses the hell out of me. As Disney is geared towards kids, it's finding a group that is 16+ for adult fanatics.

One thing that I have got going for me though is I have a house and it's now half paid for. 13 years done and mortgage-free in 12 years time. Finances are ok too with £4000 in an ISA, albeit only on 0.35% interest

wesimmo · 23 Sep 2019 at 20:26

FISHGUTS said:
Don't get a cafe for an easy life. It's not the droid your looking for.
I have one, it's very, very hard work. & not at all what your dreams will be imho.

No, I understand that, my missus has her own shop so I know it's hard work.

But it's stuff I enjoy doing and I've always wanted to be my own boss.

That said is this time of uncertainty right to open any business?

Telecaster · 23 Sep 2019 at 20:32

MissChief said:
So what interests you?

Not a lot to be honest, I've never had more than a passing interest in anything really.

I'm sure that if I were to come into a life changing amount of money that enabled me to quit working then I could find something to do with my time, but just trying to fill a few hours a week with poverty spec interests doesn't really do anything for me.

bjorkiii · 23 Sep 2019 at 20:35

Are you interested in a fleshlight I have for sale, few marks but does the job.

Puzzled · 23 Sep 2019 at 21:08

wesimmo said:
No, I understand that, my missus has her own shop so I know it's hard work.

But it's stuff I enjoy doing and I've always wanted to be my own boss.

That said is this time of uncertainty right to open any business?

A new business is always uncertain

But seriously there is never a perfect time, at some point you just have to do it

CREATIVE!11 · 23 Sep 2019 at 21:23

My problem is I just don't care about anything. I also just don't enjoy things anymore at all. Back when you were 19 going out was like a big deal go to the club with the lads it was exciting, now it's meh. Same with pc games I used to love diving into a good pc game but now I just load up play 5 mins and quit.

Am I depressed? maybe, who knows.

Ahleckz · 23 Sep 2019 at 21:24

Telecaster said:
I don't have a passport, but I get your point.

I like the idea of these things in theory but then when start to think about the hassle involved I just can't be arsed.

First step. Go get a passport. Go do it tonight, start the process.

Then why not just go somewhere? What do you like? What’s your favourite food? Just go there for a few days (assuming Europe).
I like beer, so I went to Munich.
I like paella so I went to Spain.

Now, ask yourself. WHy haven’t you applied for a passport? Stop thinking and start doing!

Apathy is the biggest killer of time, and you can stop it. Right now. Click this link and do!

https://www.passport.service.gov.uk...0941.544931176.1569270156-13837551.1568108883

Telecaster · 23 Sep 2019 at 21:28

CREATIVE!11 said:
My problem is I just don't care about anything. I also just don't enjoy things anymore at all. Back when you were 19 going out was like a big deal go to the club with the lads it was exciting, now it's meh. Same with pc games I used to love diving into a good pc game but now I just load up play 5 mins and quit.

Am I depressed? maybe, who knows.

I can relate to some of that (though I've never done the going out thing even when young)

Interests have only ever been fads really, not serious enough for me to care about them and make them life long passions or what have you, I used to like gaming and PCs a bit, then I didn't. I used to read a bit, then I didn't, that goes for lots of stuff etc.

I've always suspected I've suffered with depression, but I'm not sure because it doesn't really prevent me from functioning in my day to day life, and in the past five years I've had this job I've not had a single day off sick, nor in my last job either. If it is depression it's not crippling or debilitating.

Telecaster · 23 Sep 2019 at 21:31

Ahleckz said:
First step. Go get a passport. Go do it tonight, start the process.

Then why not just go somewhere? What do you like? What’s your favourite food? Just go there for a few days (assuming Europe).
I like beer, so I went to Munich.
I like paella so I went to Spain.

Now, ask yourself. WHy haven’t you applied for a passport? Stop thinking and start doing!

Apathy is the biggest killer of time, and you can stop it. Right now. Click this link and do!

https://www.passport.service.gov.uk...0941.544931176.1569270156-13837551.1568108883

I don't need to ask myself why I haven't applied for a passport, I know why, I just can't be arsed.

I've no burning desire to go abroad otherwise I'd obviously have done it before now.

wesimmo · 23 Sep 2019 at 21:33

CREATIVE!11 said:
My problem is I just don't care about anything. I also just don't enjoy things anymore at all. Back when you were 19 going out was like a big deal go to the club with the lads it was exciting, now it's meh. Same with pc games I used to love diving into a good pc game but now I just load up play 5 mins and quit.

Am I depressed? maybe, who knows.

Probably are depressed TBH. That's how I get when I know I'm heading back that way.

If you get frustrated with yourself for being unable to be interested in anything, but are unable to change things, it's almost certainly your mind chemistry IME.

Sutters · 23 Sep 2019 at 21:35

CREATIVE!11 said:
My problem is I just don't care about anything. I also just don't enjoy things anymore at all. Back when you were 19 going out was like a big deal go to the club with the lads it was exciting, now it's meh. Same with pc games I used to love diving into a good pc game but now I just load up play 5 mins and quit.

Am I depressed? maybe, who knows.

Sounds like nihilism, usually goes hand in hand with a lack of belief in some greater meaning of life.