Is my staff member "flirting" or just being friendly.....

ChocAndGray

ChocAndGray

ChocAndGray

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So me and a staff member (I'm her manager) have recently started messaging.

It's fairly friendly but she's attractive and I've tried dropping subtle hints. Long and short of it is I want to take her out.

I've posted a snippet of key messages, does this read to you as friendly or maybe more? The thing that threw me when I tried hinting was the "You aren't working tomorrow though"

If I get this wrong it could lead to a world of pain....So I'm trying to go for subtle but also if it turns out she is just being friendly, look like I was "only being friendly" too.






 
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I would be very careful.

It could be something.

But equally, you're her manager, which means you have power over her in some way and she might be playing along because you could sack her if she does something you don't like...or at least make life difficult for her.
 
VincentHanna said:
I would be very careful.

It could be something.

But equally, you're her manager, which means you have power over her in some way and she might be playing along because you could sack her if she does something you don't like...or at least make life difficult for her.
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And that's my concern. I'm one mis-step from a potential HR disaster.

Which is why I'm trying to be careful with what I do, as I'm trying to be obvious without opening myself up to comebacks. i.e if I ask her out and she takes it as an advance that's not reciprocated, "No no it wasn't meant like that"...

I'm also aware of how inappropriate it is in some regards. It wouldn't be looked at positively by other people at work if they found out I took her out...

I normally avoid anything at work, as if things go wrong it is a whole can of worms, but the fact she's attractive, nice to be around and dating apps have been horrendous for me has made it more appealing.
 
So many lols and laughing smily faces!?. Anyway, just go for it, you'll soon work out if she is interested or not, just don't let her take you for a ride and string you along.

Take a chance, if you think she's worth it then go for it.

Being her manager does make it a little tricky but as long as you don't just jump on her or say sleezy things then you will be fine.
 
VincentHanna said:
I would be very careful.

It could be something.

But equally, you're her manager, which means you have power over her in some way and she might be playing along because you could sack her if she does something you don't like...or at least make life difficult for her.
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Get outta here with all that sense
 
azazl187 said:
So many lols and laughing smily faces!?. Anyway, just go for it, you'll soon work out if she is interested or not, just don't let her take you for a ride and string you along.

Take a chance, if you think she's worth it then go for it.

Being her manager does make it a little tricky but as long as you don't just jump on her or say sleezy things then you will be fine.
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The thing that threw me is the "but you're not working tomorrow".

There's a difference between just popping out to Mcdonalds during work versus meeting outside of work, but her first reaction was the fact I'm not working.
 
ChocAndGray said:
And that's my concern. I'm one mis-step from a potential HR disaster.

Which is why I'm trying to be careful with what I do, as I'm trying to be obvious without opening myself up to comebacks. i.e if I ask her out and she takes it as an advance that's not reciprocated, "No no it wasn't meant like that"...

I'm also aware of how inappropriate it is in some regards. It wouldn't be looked at positively by other people at work if they found out I took her out...

I normally avoid anything at work, as if things go wrong it is a whole can of worms, but the fact she's attractive, nice to be around and dating apps have been horrendous for me has made it more appealing.
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There's a good phrase about not ******* where you sleep. It applies to relationships at work too.
 
Semple said:
There's a good phrase about not ******* where you sleep. It applies to relationships at work too.
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Yeah I know, I guess I need to stop thinking with my private's and use my head....

@VincentHanna touched on a very good point too, that she could just be playing along to keep me sweet. She might be thinking that she doesn't want to make me feel awkward incase I make her time at work tough. Which I would never do....
 
[FnG]magnolia said:
This seems like a great way to get fired and not laid at the same time. Double whammy :cool:

I feel GD equilibrium returning, namaste.
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I guess if I cool off and she takes the lead it would be different.....

This thread has certainly changed my outlook on my next steps. I was initially planning on following through with suggesting meeting after she finishes work. But I'm opening myself up here for potentially nothing in return and a disciplinary.
 
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