Tips for a grooms speech

[Amplus]

Getting married in a few weeks and absolutely bricking it having to give a speech. Looked on Google for templates and frankly they are all a bit rubbish especially the recommended 'jokes'.

Was thinking of just keeping it simple with just thank you's, saying how beautiful the bride looks and a story of how we met. Was going to leave the jokes to the best men. Worried I'll come across boring though. Not really much of a speaker.

 

[glenimp617]

Getting married in a few weeks and absolutely bricking it having to give a speech. Looked on Google for templates and frankly they are all a bit rubbish especially the recommended 'jokes'.

Was thinking of just keeping it simple with just thank you's, saying how beautiful the bride looks and a story of how we met. Was going to leave the jokes to the best men. Worried I'll come across boring though. Not really much of a speaker.

No, what you have said is about right. I've been to a fair few weddings, and generally the guests want the speeches over as quickly as the people giving them. It's all about the food and entertainment lol

Short and sweet is the way!

Top tip though.........get her name right. Honestly, I've been to one where he didn't and she divorced him soon afterwards. It wasn't one where the room laughed it off either as a plain mistake, it was deathly silence.

 

[TripleT]

"I'm sure you'll all agree on how gorgeous she looks..." *points to Mother in Law*

Trust me

 

[Nitefly]

I can only really speak for best man’s speeches but the internet is so crap for things like this. All the “absolute do’s and don’ts....” only pay attention to them if you are literally squirming at the thought of doing the speech.

Just be genuine and sincere to your family and your wife. Don’t feel obliged to say anything you don’t want to. If the audience get bored by your speech then frankly, **** ‘em, they shouldn’t be there.

If you want a bit of structure:

First, thank the brides dad for his speech.

Say the obligatory “my wife and I...” and everyone will cheer “....thank you all for coming”.

Acknowledge people / family who have provided considerable support to either of you financial or otherwise. Usually this involves a nod to the parents. You can optionally make a toast to those people.

Say how you met your wife. One or two anecdotes.

Say how your wife makes you feel.

Toast your wife.

The end *thumbs up*

 

[wesimmo]

I'd say if you're that nervous/uncomfortable about it, and I'm talking from a position of empathy, people will know that if they're your friends and family.

They won't be expecting you to stand up and be a comic genius. Stick to the basics, stand up and say your thing and sit down again.

No one wants to see you struggle through some big speech filled with awkward jokes and silences on your big day, they'll appreciate the lack of awkwardness more than judge you for lack of content!

 

[Yaayuh!]

I'm watching this thread and have bookmarked for next year...

 

[200sols]

Was thinking of just keeping it simple

You already have the best idea. If your not the sort of person who cracks loads of jokes.... dont or it'll be obvious you pasted them from the internet. Just keep it short and natural, those are the best speeches.

 

[MookJong]

Don't use anything from online, write from the heart, tell the story of how you met and some of the things that have happened over the years and the comedy will write it's self. It's one of the only opportunity life gives you to say thanks to your friends and family, don't waste it.

Please don't be nervous, don't make it about you, make it about your wife and the people attending. If you can enjoy it it will be one of the best memories of your life.

There is this expectation built up around these speeches and having to be nervous. Honestly don't believe the hype, this is the easiest speech you can ever make as everyone is rooting for you.

Get pumped and smash it.

 

[doodah]

Spent months writing notes in my Keep for my speech, then the day came and I hadn't finished or learnt it. I tried to sit down at the top table and finish off but people kept coming up to me, my mum then spilled a glass of champagne on me. I stomped off with my chair outside, back facing just to have 10 minutes to bring my thoughts together. Still no luck as people kept coming up to me, so I gave up and winged it. Fortunately it seemed to go down well. Listening to the other speeches really helped and as you have said your main job is to thank the relevant people, share a few stories/anecdotes and then spend the remaining half saying how amazing your wife is. Don't try to be too funny, enjoy yourself and you will smash it .

 

[cheesyboy]

Reading online speeches is ok to reassure yourself that yours is 'normal'. I suppose Youtube might have some to actually watch now, not an option (or at least, not an option I was aware of) when I got married 11 years ago. But take them more as a structure or style guide and fill with your own material. Keep it simple, thank the people you need to thank, give out the bridesmaids gifts, complement the bride etc

I actually loved giving mine, though was certainly nervous about it in advance. The room is on your side, they help you out laughing or fawning at the right moments so you feel like a comedy god.

 

[Ayahuasca]

It sounds like you won’t anyway but just don’t be that guy who cracks brutal jokes for the sake of looking edgy, I’ve been to a wedding where the best man decided a pedo joke was funny in a room full of kids.

 

[Terminal_Boy]

I can only really speak for best man’s speeches but the internet is so crap for things like this. All the “absolute do’s and don’ts....” only pay attention to them if you are literally squirming at the thought of doing the speech.

Just be genuine and sincere to your family and your wife. Don’t feel obliged to say anything you don’t want to. If the audience get bored by your speech then frankly, **** ‘em, they shouldn’t be there.

If you want a bit of structure:

First, thank the brides dad for his speech.

Say the obligatory “my wife and I...” and everyone will cheer “....thank you all for coming”.

Acknowledge people / family who have provided considerable support to either of you financial or otherwise. Usually this involves a nod to the parents. You can optionally make a toast to those people.

Say how you met your wife. One or two anecdotes.

Say how your wife makes you feel.

Toast your wife.

The end *thumbs up*

Short, respectful, heartfelt, always well received.

 

[ArchAnGeL]

As you said. Keep it brief. Groom's speech is thanking people and complementing the wife. Don't be afraid of having a list to make sure you cover everyone you are thanking.

 

[dirtychinchilla]

I can only really speak for best man’s speeches but the internet is so crap for things like this. All the “absolute do’s and don’ts....” only pay attention to them if you are literally squirming at the thought of doing the speech.

Just be genuine and sincere to your family and your wife. Don’t feel obliged to say anything you don’t want to. If the audience get bored by your speech then frankly, **** ‘em, they shouldn’t be there.

If you want a bit of structure:

First, thank the brides dad for his speech.

Say the obligatory “my wife and I...” and everyone will cheer “....thank you all for coming”.

Acknowledge people / family who have provided considerable support to either of you financial or otherwise. Usually this involves a nod to the parents. You can optionally make a toast to those people.

Say how you met your wife. One or two anecdotes.

Say how your wife makes you feel.

Toast your wife.

The end *thumbs up*

Having done a groom's speech, I agree with this. I pretty much followed that structure, but it was incidental. I just sat down with a piece of paper a couple of weeks before the wedding, started with the thanks and then started to talk about my wife and how we met. It sort of flowed from there. It probably wasn't the most exciting speech, but she liked it and that's all that matters.

So, just sit down and write something, and then you can always revisit it.

 

[joey1211]

"I am so happy to be here to see the two of them together at last... her legs that is."

Bob Mortimer supposedly said this in his best man speech and was shunned by the bride's family for the rest of the day

 

[Raymond Lin]

The groom's speech is the easiest one.

You just need to be sweet, genuine and complimentary. You don't need to be funny or expected to be. Simple and short.

You can tell a story about how you guys met if you like, but if it is simply a drunken night out, leave those out, drunk stories are only funny to those who were a part of it. If it is romantic, go nuts.

 

[chroniclard]

Wedding at the weekend, groom was pretty funny, no pressure.

 

[kinobestew123]

My thoughts:

1) Depending on the order of your speeches, don't be too set in what you're going to say as it's likely that those going before you might steal some of your thunder thus needing you to amend your speech on the fly.
2) If writing some notes, write how you would say it in conversation. A lot of template speeches are very formal and use language that you wouldn't personally use making it feel very laboured.
3) If using anecdotes, make sure everyone will understand them. Inside jokes or anecdotes where you "had to be there" just don't work.

I kept mine sincere but had a small dig at the best man at the very end to lighten the mood as I handed over to him knowing he would be throwing stuff back at me.

 

[the_r_sole]

nobody wants to hear your speech, just keep it simple, thank everyone that needs thanked, tell everyone about how untrustworthy the best man is and how much they lie, then sit down.
Under no circumstances drag it out any longer!

 

[Nitefly]

nobody wants to hear your speech, just keep it simple, thank everyone that needs thanked, tell everyone about how untrustworthy the best man is and how much they lie, then sit down.
Under no circumstances drag it out any longer!

I think this is mostly rubbish and, at the very least, rude. If you can’t be bothered to hear what the FOB, groom or bridesmaids / best man have to say then you don’t deserve to be there.

I would agree that there is no need for filler but the only circumstances where ‘going on for too long’ applies is it’s objectively really, really long (and boring).