Friday Joke 33⅓ : Revenge of the Joke

Tru · 21 Apr 2006 at 13:33

Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties. She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all. One afternoon the local Reverend came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea.

As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister noticed a cut-glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water, and in the water floated, of all things, a condom! When she returned with tea and scones, they began to chat.

The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and He could no longer resist. "Miss Beatrice", he said, "I wonder if you would tell me about this?" pointing to the bowl. "Oh, yes," she replied, "Isn't it wonderful?

I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground. The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven't had the flu all winter?"

red11 · 21 Apr 2006 at 13:35

kitten_caboodle · 21 Apr 2006 at 13:35

fantastic

iCraig · 21 Apr 2006 at 13:35

I expected better from you man.

SidewinderINC · 21 Apr 2006 at 13:35

get out

Sic · 21 Apr 2006 at 13:57

nice one sir! been some quality comedy on here today - wonder who's going to wreck it!

Spud21 · 21 Apr 2006 at 14:03

heh, an actual funny joke on OcUK, what is the world coming too

A2Z · 21 Apr 2006 at 14:09

not. funny.

Sanzy · 21 Apr 2006 at 14:15

Chunky · 21 Apr 2006 at 14:17

Treefrog · 21 Apr 2006 at 14:20

Hehe - lobsters on your piano > crabs on your organ

William · 21 Apr 2006 at 15:28

Sic said:
nice one sir! been some quality comedy on here today - wonder who's going to wreck it!

A professor is giving the first year medical students their first
lecture on autopsies, and decides to give them a few basics before
starting.

"You must be capable of two things to do an autopsy. The first thing
is that you must have no sense of fear." At this point, the lecturer
sticks his finger into the dead man's anus, and then licks it.

He asks all the students to do the same thing with the corpses in
front of them. After a couple of minutes' silence, they all follow
suit.

"The second thing is that you must have an acute sense of observation:
I stuck my middle finger into the corpse's anus, but I licked my
index."

dymetrie · 21 Apr 2006 at 15:54

William said:
A professor is giving the first year medical students their first
lecture on autopsies, and decides to give them a few basics before
starting.

"You must be capable of two things to do an autopsy. The first thing
is that you must have no sense of fear." At this point, the lecturer
sticks his finger into the dead man's anus, and then licks it.

He asks all the students to do the same thing with the corpses in
front of them. After a couple of minutes' silence, they all follow
suit.

"The second thing is that you must have an acute sense of observation:
I stuck my middle finger into the corpse's anus, but I licked my
index."

trust you Billy!

Van_Dammesque · 21 Apr 2006 at 16:05

Groans!!!!

Drake5 · 21 Apr 2006 at 16:08

Lol its not that bad. 7/10

Made me laugh

- Denic

Sic · 21 Apr 2006 at 16:08

William said:
A professor is giving the first year medical students their first
lecture on autopsies, and decides to give them a few basics before
starting.

"You must be capable of two things to do an autopsy. The first thing
is that you must have no sense of fear." At this point, the lecturer
sticks his finger into the dead man's anus, and then licks it.

He asks all the students to do the same thing with the corpses in
front of them. After a couple of minutes' silence, they all follow
suit.

"The second thing is that you must have an acute sense of observation:
I stuck my middle finger into the corpse's anus, but I licked my
index."

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WE HAVE A LOSER!

Royality · 21 Apr 2006 at 16:10

First Joke wasn't funny.

Second Joke was alright for an oldy.

William · 21 Apr 2006 at 16:16

Sic said:
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WE HAVE A LOSER!

Nows the point where I would usually try an come back with a good joke, but I usually make a hash of it and it slides further downhill.

Wryel · 21 Apr 2006 at 16:19

Lol from me for both!

red11 · 21 Apr 2006 at 16:20

William said:
A professor is giving the first year medical students their first
lecture on autopsies, and decides to give them a few basics before
starting.

"You must be capable of two things to do an autopsy. The first thing
is that you must have no sense of fear." At this point, the lecturer
sticks his finger into the dead man's anus, and then licks it.

He asks all the students to do the same thing with the corpses in
front of them. After a couple of minutes' silence, they all follow
suit.

"The second thing is that you must have an acute sense of observation:
I stuck my middle finger into the corpse's anus, but I licked my
index."

Very good, but I feel a bit sick now. *Pushes food aside