Saturday night joke...

Caporegime
Joined
28 Jun 2005
Posts
48,294
Location
On the hoods
The bacon tree

These three Legionnaires are walking through the desert under a baking
sun. They're fully equipped with enough water for days and food aplenty.


On the shimmering horizon, mirages come and go and come again. They see visions of swimming pools attended by dusky maidens and stalls full of ice creams and sorbets of every conceivable flavour. But the Legionnaires do not crack. Instead they keep marching solidly on.


Suddenly one of them freezes. "Psssst," he says. His companions halt and strain their eyes to where the first Legionnaire is pointing.


"Le voila," he says, "Regardez, mes amis, isn't zat a bacon tree on ze
'orizon?"


And sure enough, there it is, proud and defiant in the middle of the
desert, a true bacon tree. Slowly they creep forward towards the far off
mystery object. Inch by inch, centimetre by centimetre, until they are
within a stone's throw of the bacon tree. Ever nearer they creep until
suddenly a shot rings out, dropping one of the Legionnaires in his tracks.
The other Legionnaires hit the ground as bullets thud into the sand
around them.


The other two return fire and give first aid to their wounded
companion. Even as they bandage him and pour water over his face they can hear his faint voice. "Zat was no bacon tree," he gasps, "Zat was an 'am bush."
 
taxi-cab-sad-face-sedan-pedal-car-rear.jpg


tbh
 
What do you call a leper in a bath?
Stu.

What's brown and gurgles?
A baby in a casserole.

How many nuns does it take to put in a lightbulb.
Nun.

What do women and dog crap have in common?
The older they are, the easier they are to pick up.

On a cold, cold night two bulls are standing in a field. One says "Boy it's mighty cold out here!", the other says "Yes, I think I might slip into a nice Jersey".

What's slimy cold long and smells like pork
Kermit the frogs finger

What do you call an anorexic with thrush?
A quarter pounder with cheese!


Thank you, I'm here all week. Try the chicken, it's delicious.
 
Scuzi said:
What do you call a leper in a bath?
Stu.

What's brown and gurgles?
A baby in a casserole.

How many nuns does it take to put in a lightbulb.
Nun.

What do women and dog crap have in common?
The older they are, the easier they are to pick up.

On a cold, cold night two bulls are standing in a field. One says "Boy it's mighty cold out here!", the other says "Yes, I think I might slip into a nice Jersey".

What's slimy cold long and smells like pork
Kermit the frogs finger

What do you call an anorexic with thrush?
A quarter pounder with cheese!


Thank you, I'm here all week. Try the chicken, it's delicious.

Get out! :p
 
Back
Top Bottom