Poll: relationship advice, dump her or not?

Stick or twist? YOU decide.

  • Dump her, she doesn't deserve you.

    Votes: 83 42.6%

  • Keep her, you can work it out and trust her again.

    Votes: 22 11.3%

  • Drink yourself into oblivion, that'll ease the pain & you won't care either way.

    Votes: 28 14.4%

  • Ignore it all and go gay, just to see what all the fuss is about.

    Votes: 62 31.8%
  • Total voters
    195
  • Poll closed .

Dracata

Dracata

Dracata

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Joined
21 Oct 2006
Posts
1,615
Location
Cambridge
I love my girlfriend to bits, and i know that she loves me - though i know at the same time she's young and wants a single life, it'll break both of our hearts if i do break up with her but -

her family have a flat in jersey and she went there on holiday recently, i came down for a week and we had a pretty good time, though i could tell things were a bit funny between us.

i came back on saturday and she's still out there, i spoke to her yesterday and she said she's really really sorry but she's ******** up and got with another guy over there (kissed).

Do i end it?

I love her more than i've ever loved anyone.. but i'm not about to be used/walked all over.

so of course i post on AN INTERNET HARDWARE FORUM!

opinions please

edit: didn't spot the sweary!

Update:

Just an update so anyone that might have been wondering or not, i finished things with her and hopefully we'll stay friends..
 
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Dump her mate. How old is she, it sounds as if though you are significantly older than her, immature girls are exactly that, immature, and as a result do not make good girlfriends, I personally would not go out with a girl younger than 20, I myself am 20. The trust will be extemely hard to build up again and will most likely result in the relationship terminating at some point down the line anyhow, it won't be easy but you will heal much quicker than you think. There are lots more girls out there.
 
I'm 21, she's 18 - Yeah i know it's probably the right thing to do, it's just difficult when you've fallen in love with someone.
 
Dracata said:
I'm 21, she's 18 - Yeah i know it's probably the right thing to do, it's just difficult when you've fallen in love with someone.
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Not trying to put you down here but at her age, she will want to be off doing her own thing, and the fact she has acted so carelessly and kissed someone else so easily says to me shes just not ready and you should move on. The first time always hurts like hell, but you move onto bigger and better things.
 
I know you say you love her to bits, but doing that on you.. she is young at 18, got lots of life experiences infront of her, so have you. So my advice (from a 36yr old!) is to dump her and enjoy yourself.
Theres plenty more fish in the sea that need feeding ;)
 
i think i knew what you were all going to say, i just hate having to be realistic - i hate being in love! makes you feel like crap..
 
Dracata said:
i think i knew what you were all going to say, i just hate having to be realistic - i hate being in love! makes you feel like crap..
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That it does, but it heals up ok, especially if you are the breakupper, as opposed to the breakupee :)

Signed
Breakupee from first real love ;)
 
Now she has cheated I wouldn't trust her. She is probably sorry for doing it and realises what you have between you is much deeper and she wont want to loose this.

However at 18 I'll guess she is probably in two minds if she wants to be tied down to anything really serious. The urge to play away and have fun will always be there now she has done this.

I would leave it in her hands, tell her that you want to end it and it's up to her to prove what she really wants.
 
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MookJong said:
Now she has cheated I wouldn't trust her. She is probably sorry for doing it and realises what you have between you is much deeper and she wont want to loose this.

However at 18 I'll guess she is probably in two minds if she wants to be tied down to anything really serious. The urge to play away and have fun will always be there now she has done this.

I would leave it in her hands, tell her that you want to end it and it's up to her to prove what she really wants.
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Thats how i've left it for the moment, i think the main thing is that i really don't want to break up with her.

My words were along the lines of:

You know how i feel about you and i know how you feel about me, we've never hidden that - all i want from you is honesty, i want you to be honest to yourself and realise if you are actually sorry, or we're only together for the sake of it.

Saying that, i don't know if i just want to 'leave' it upto her, i'm no mug and i don't plan on setting myself up to be hurt again..
 
I've been with my girlfriend since she was 16 (19 now), and I know she would NEVER cheat on me. If she did she'd be gone in a flash. Finish her mate she's not worth it.
 
Dracata said:
Actually, i'm in love.. and i don't think i'm being immature about this at all
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Being in love means nothing without having trust and faith in your partner.

Dump Her.
 
Gigi said:
Being in love means nothing without having trust and faith in your partner.

Dump Her.
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Truer words haven't been spoken..

I knew what your answers would be and i think i just needed the reassurance

Cheers
 
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