BETTER JOKE

Boo, not funny!

Q). Why is a woman like KFC?

A). When you've finished with the legs and breast, all that's left is a greasy bucket to put your bone in!
 
In a hospital serving victims of land mines, a little girl wakes up from surgery.

Little Girl: "Doctor, something is wrong... I can't feel my legs"

Doctor: "Yes, we've had to amputate both your arms".
 
Azagoth said:
In a hospital serving victims of land mines, a little girl wakes up from surgery.

Little Girl: "Doctor, something is wrong... I can't feel my legs"

Doctor: "Yes, we've had to amputate both your arms".
Click to expand...

This and KFC joke made me laugh. Not often an OCUK joke makes me laugh!
 
From a work email today so older than the hills but......

Three women friends, one in a casual relationship, one engaged to be married
and one a long-time wife, met for drinks after work. The conversation
eventually drifted towards how
best to spice up their sex lives.

After much discussion, they decided to surprise their men by engaging in
some S&M role playing.

The following week they met up again to compare notes. Sipping her drink,
the single girl leered and said, 'Last Friday at the end of the work day I
went to my boyfriend's office wearing a leather coat. When all the other
people had left, I slipped out of it and all I had on was a leather bodice,
black stockings and stiletto heels. He was so aroused that we made mad
passionate love on his desk right then and there!'

The engaged woman giggled and said, 'That's pretty much my story! When my
fiancé got home last Friday, he found me waiting for him in a black mask,
leather bodice, black hose and stiletto pumps. He was so turned on that we
not only made love all night, he wants to move up our wedding date!

The married woman put her glass down and said, 'I did a lot of planning. I
made arrangements for the kids to stay over at Grandma's. I took a long
scented-oil bath and then put on my best perfume. I slipped into a tight
leather bodice, a black garter belt, black stockings and six-inch stilettos.
I finished it off with a black mask, ready for action.

When my husband got home from work, he grabbed a beer and the remote, sat
down and yelled, 'Hey, Batman, what's for dinner?'
Click to expand...

KaHn
 
Two married buddies are out drinking one night when one turns to the other and says, "You know, I don't know what else to do. Whenever I go home after we've been out drinking, I turn the headlights off before I get to the driveway. I shut off the engine and coast into the garage. I take my shoes off before I go into the house, I sneak up the stairs, I get undressed in the bathroom. I ease into bed and my wife STILL wakes up and yells at me for staying out so late!"

His buddy looks at him and says, "Well, you're obviously taking the wrong approach. I screech into the driveway, slam the door, storm up the steps, throw my shoes into the closet, jump into bed, rub my hands on my wife's ass and say, 'How about a blowjob?' ... and she's always sound asleep."
 
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