Bristol - twinned with the Bermuda Triangle

Ev0

Ev0

Ev0

Soldato
Joined
18 Oct 2002
Posts
14,225
last 3 trips to Bristol have all resulted in the same outcome.

Borrowed various sat nav units each time.

Getting into Bristol where I want to go, no problem.

Getting out again, the way I came, a nightmare.

I don't know what's wrong with Bristol but every sat nav has refused to take us to junction 19 of the M5 (to carry on south) on the way out. I've ended up 2 or 3 junctions up, or tonight it took us down some A road to junction 20 or 21.

The funniest was when the evil sat nav ladyvoice told us on this perfectly straight road to turn left onto this small road that was "unsuitable for vehicles bigger than a smart car".

Then as soon as we turn off she has the flaming cheek to go on about recalculating the route as it's not where she wanted us to go, even though she said turn frickin' left.

So the psycological warfare began, I ignored her instructions and finally got home.

Doesn't help that the signage in the city centre was so terrible, I just want a sign that says M5 south this way please.

I just can't understand how driving in is fine, but can never for the life of me take the same route out!
 
I hate bristol. It is impossible to navigate around, and i have done it more than a few times now. I simply cannot get out without seemingly ending up in a random place. The roadsigns dont point where they say they do, and generally the whole layout sucks.

I had the misfortune of trying to get the the airport when the bristol marathon was on. Every diversion, labelled A,B and C, all took you back to the starting point. Needless to say despite leaving in plenty of time i missed my flight.

I also cannot stand the accent, just one word and i want to kill them all with a large mallet.
 
I think the actual quickest way out of Bristol if you wish to head South West is to out via the random A road. Otherwise you go pretty much on the opposite direction to get to the Motorway which goes to the M4 which then goes back around to the M5.
 
Malt_Vinegar said:
I also cannot stand the accent, just one word and i want to kill them all with a large mallet.
Click to expand...

Nothign wrong with the accent, obvious that they all wish they were actually from Devon so try the accent on for size :)

[TW]Fox;10339681 said:
I think the actual quickest way out of Bristol if you wish to head South West is to out via the random A road. Otherwise you go pretty much on the opposite direction to get to the Motorway which goes to the M4 which then goes back around to the M5.
Click to expand...

Yup that happened the first time, ended up on that M4 area, cracking. It's when you see you're on the 'wrong' side of the river you thing aw cr...
 
[TW]Fox;10339681 said:
I think the actual quickest way out of Bristol if you wish to head South West is to out via the random A road. Otherwise you go pretty much on the opposite direction to get to the Motorway which goes to the M4 which then goes back around to the M5.
Click to expand...

A38.

Its the way you'd go to Newquay before the M5 was built.
 
I can't stand my AA Road Map's accent! But at least it never sends me the wrong way, it doesn't even complain if I ignore it. :D


On an even less serious note, has anyone seen the bumper stickers that say "I'm only here because my Sat Nav lied!"
 
Bristol's easy!

Southbound in and out, don't mess around with the A370 or even the A38 - quickest way is the A4 portway to junction 18 - trust :)
 
I can tell you why it's bad in Brizzle.

The traffic planning office that used to be right in the center was moved. I forget where, somewhere up by Aztek West I think. Think they got more concerned with the layout of the new offices rather than the roads!!!
 
[TW]Fox;10339681 said:
I think the actual quickest way out of Bristol if you wish to head South West is to out via the random A road. Otherwise you go pretty much on the opposite direction to get to the Motorway which goes to the M4 which then goes back around to the M5.
Click to expand...



the A4 out of the centre to avonmouth doesnt go anywhere near the M4. joins the M5 at J18.

centre -> m4 requires you to take either A38 north or the M32, both of which are totally the opposite direction
 
heh the only place ive found worse than bristol for navigating around is Andover lol that place is god awefull and hope i never have to go through there again.
 
i remember last year, we drove down to Devon, just past Barnstaple, my satnav told me to turn left into this extremely narrow pathway, so like a numpty i did as 'sat nav nkew best:D', anyway, turns out to be about 3 miles of this narrow lane, my wing mirrors were almost touching the hay on either side of the road, i'd have been a bit stuck if something came the opposite way :D
 
Tesla said:
First time I have ever heard anybody say this!

My 5-a-side team is called "Young Un's Utd" ;)
Click to expand...


lol, I lived in Bath for a few years back in the late 80's/early 90's and a lot of the locals that I worked with said yung 'un all the time

"waats the wether loik, yung un"

"prapa jaab, yung un"

and so on :D
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom