crank dat soulja boy

Don't wanna make you hurt
Don't wanna make you feel
like the world ain't on your side
like you're never gonna get it right
no I can't fight I can't sleep at night
just thinking about you girl
I'm a fool for you
yes I am
 
I don't know if they have the song in the UK since I'm in Ohio. I imagine they do.

My sweaty-socks roommates decided to throw a house party for our friends. One of my braindead consorts decided to put the gathering as a public party of Facebook (which is the devil). The police estimated that 950 people were in attendance but that's skipping ahead a bit. It was going along OK, in a vaguely Animal House-esque sort of fashion until somebody commandeered the PA system. The individual had begun to play Soulja Boy. The house erupted in a cacophony of jumping and shouting. The living room, the largest dancable area, was entirely filled. The dancers performed a close approximation of the song's accompanying dance which involves a lot of jumping and stomping. The house began to shake violently. I ran to the basement to see what the floor was like beneath the wild beasts. When I got there I found that three floor joists has torn loose from the poured-concrete foundation. Keep in mind that my house is approximately 100 years old and was not soundly constructed, even then. Some of the steel jacks that serve to supplement the open spans of flooring has shifted to the side with the rhythmic oscillations of the floor and had begun to buckle. At the center of the open span the floor moved approximately 3 inches in either direction as it loaded and unloaded.

Oh ****, thought I. I, covering my head so as to avoid the wood fibers and paint chips that rained down from above, ran to the home's circuit breaker box and pulled the large ceramic main fuse, plunging the house into darkness, but not silence. Seething with drunken anger at the loss of such a good time the party crashers poured into the street and surrounding yards.
Sometimes endowed with good sense, I hid in the shadows, not wanting to be fingered as the person who killed the party. Meanwhile a brawl had ensued between some white partygoers and some of their, apparently, local black rivals beginning in my side yard moving into the street. The fight expanded into a small riot during which one of my close associates was hit in the left eye with a bottle. Someone called the police who, for 20 minutes, attempted to disperse the crowd by driving through it and yelling at drunken fools over their PA systems.

We were not cited for anything but two people were arrested as they had outstanding warrants. My associate with the broken face required $10,000 surgery to repair his nose and maxillary bone, a component of the orbit which houses the eye.

As a result I do not allow gatherings at which I do not personally know every person in attendance. Furthermore no rap music of any kind is permitted at such events.
 
BillytheImpaler said:
I don't know if they have the song in the UK since I'm in Ohio. I imagine they do.

My sweaty-socks roommates decided to throw a house party for our friends. One of my braindead consorts decided to put the gathering as a public party of Facebook (which is the devil). The police estimated that 950 people were in attendance but that's skipping ahead a bit. It was going along OK, in a vaguely Animal House-esque sort of fashion until somebody commandeered the PA system. The individual had begun to play Soulja Boy. The house erupted in a cacophony of jumping and shouting. The living room, the largest dancable area, was entirely filled. The dancers performed a close approximation of the song's accompanying dance which involves a lot of jumping and stomping. The house began to shake violently. I ran to the basement to see what the floor was like beneath the wild beasts. When I got there I found that three floor joists has torn loose from the poured-concrete foundation. Keep in mind that my house is approximately 100 years old and was not soundly constructed, even then. Some of the steel jacks that serve to supplement the open spans of flooring has shifted to the side with the rhythmic oscillations of the floor and had begun to buckle. At the center of the open span the floor moved approximately 3 inches in either direction as it loaded and unloaded.

Oh ****, thought I. I, covering my head so as to avoid the wood fibers and paint chips that rained down from above, ran to the home's circuit breaker box and pulled the large ceramic main fuse, plunging the house into darkness, but not silence. Seething with drunken anger at the loss of such a good time the party crashers poured into the street and surrounding yards.
Sometimes endowed with good sense, I hid in the shadows, not wanting to be fingered as the person who killed the party. Meanwhile a brawl had ensued between some white partygoers and some of their, apparently, local black rivals beginning in my side yard moving into the street. The fight expanded into a small riot during which one of my close associates was hit in the left eye with a bottle. Someone called the police who, for 20 minutes, attempted to disperse the crowd by driving through it and yelling at drunken fools over their PA systems.

We were not cited for anything but two people were arrested as they had outstanding warrants. My associate with the broken face required $10,000 surgery to repair his nose and maxillary bone, a component of the orbit which houses the eye.

As a result I do not allow gatherings at which I do not personally know every person in attendance. Furthermore no rap music of any kind is permitted at such events.
Click to expand...

LOL Good god, sounds scary and I know how much jumping goes on in the song! (the whole team did it on the field at our last game).

Does the house need any structural work?
 
We repaired the broken joists and installed new steel support columns/jacks. It's probably better now than it was before. It may be my imagination but the house seems less creaky now.
 
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