Does anyone else have no friends?

[AHarvey]

Ok, this is going to be a little odd and sound a little Emo but..

Up until the age of 10 I had friends, but I was a book worm. I played out but was happier inside reading. Birthday parties were always mental as the whole school came round, used to go out on our BMX's etc.

In school I was part of the popular group, as well as the geeky people, had loads of friends, some good friends.

My wife and I got together at 15, and it is 20 years together next march, which means it's 17 years since we left college.

I've had many jobs since then, some short term to start but only 3 in the last 10 years. Longest was 7 years and I don't think I walked away with one real friend.

I've a mate Chris who I met as we had kids at the same time, we text a few times a month, but he's a mate really. As a couple we're out at Christmas with other couples, we have couple friends we do stuff with, Christmas parties, BBQ's, nights out 4 or 5 times a year. People seem to like us, we're always having a laugh when we do meet others, people come to me for advice or help, people seem to like me.

I work, I'm a dad, a husband, I sleep. That is how it goes. I can be someone's rock in times of need, but I also get times where I just can't be bothered with the BS that comes out of people.

No one just turns up at our house other than family, we don't turn up at others homes. if I needed somewhere to crash i have no idea where I'd go. Hell, I didn't even have a stag do 7 years ago because I didn't have anyone to invite, just made excuses to not have one.

Is it just me that's like this? Is it a result of today's society that people don't have those close friendships anymore? is it a geeky thing where I've spent too long in front of a keyboard I've forgotten 'how to friend' Am I just odd?

(I've just watched "I love you man" and it really struck a cord)

 

[AHarvey]

I've got no friends. Nothing malicious, I just always preferred my own company as a child and as I got older I never really changed. I obviously know and interact with others and it's all civil and jovial enough, but not one actual friend. No one I'd rely on or be able to talk about anything important and certainly wouldn't visit them or expect them to knock on my door ever.

It is what it is.

That's it, I've been the same, happy in front of a computer, happy on my own but at the same time, knowing I don't have any close friends is like a massive kick in the feels. Tomorrow I probably won't care about it again, but I get moments when I do.

 

[AHarvey]

Do you talk to your wife about how voluptuous "Kim K's" assets are, etc? Would you go on a bender with your wife? etc, I would say some people probably do. Others know the boundaries whereas with friends usually there aren't many boundaries other than the sexual ones even then sometimes not.

Wife is a friend of sorts but I wouldn't answer if someone asked me who my friends are, etc. It's a different relationship than from a friend. Soul mate is more apt IMO. I'm not saying you can't be friends with your wife you can be. It's just to say I only have 4 friends and 1 of them is my wife. To me that then says you only have 3 friends tbh.

If I was to add family into the friends circle then hell my numbers would easily triple.

You can have friends you don't talk certain subjects with.

New hot girl in the office, not one to talk to your missus about. Christmas plans, not your Muslim mate. Immigration, not your mate who's sound but also a bit thick and supports BNP/UKIP etc.

You cater your conversation topics to the friend you're talking too.

I know a lad called James, the only thing he likes to talk about it sports, I hate talking sports, but if I didn't I'd talk to him about that, not about the latest news in information security like I do with the other lad I know, Nathan.

Just because you can't talk to your missus about wanting to bend the new girl over doesn't mean she's not a friend.