Does my friend have a problem?

[Hybrids]

To put it simple, he spends all day infront of the computer playing computer games. He has a girlfriend with two kids but won't leave the house not even get a job! His gf is getting worried and emailed me the other day about this.

In the past i've been hooked to games playing for hours and hours everyday but I think this situation is a little different. The only time he leaves the house(computer) is when I can persuade him to come out for a few pints down our local(which is rare) other than that everytime he goes out with his gf he constantly moans, he says he feels sick and just wants to go back to the house! Once he gets home he goes on the computer and feels great. When his gf asks whats the matter he simply replies "I don't know"

Whats the matter with my friend? Does he have a problem? Has anybody here gone through a similar phase? Anyone here study psychology, if so is there a reason for this behavior?

Is there anything I can do to help his situation? I know this guy really well if I confronted him with this he would deny he had a problem and would just say that im panicing over nothing(mayeb I am?).

thanks for any replies,

Hybrids

 

[Hybrids]

Is he addicted to a particular game? How old is he anyway?

He is 22 years old and he used to play two games but in recent months he's just playing one.

The games were ET and WoW. WoW is the game he constantly plays right now.

Hybrids

 

[Hybrids]

When I'm at home I play wow a lot but things like work etc have my priority, you've said that you realised the problem, I really don't think my friend will the only way he would stop is for him to get bored of the game but maybe then he would find another?

Before he was with his girlfriend he used to either go out drinking a lot(when he had a job and money) or play ET with his clan. He used to play ET almost the same amount as WoW.

Just to add when I said he had two kids I should have mention that they are not his but they do mean a lot to him.

I believe his gf is getting fed up but she left her home and family 250 miles away to be with him so it would be difficult for her to leave(she considers me as her only friend in the region).

When I get back home(currently in California) I amm planning to have a word with him about it, try and get on his case to get a job(can't see it working..). Hopefully if he gets a job it may break the cycle of his gaming. Although a few weeks ago his computer broke for a couple of days and he told me he got depressed and started having dreams about playing wow etc... Worrying tbh!

Hybrids

 

[Hybrids]

Your right, he should be looking for a job to support his gf and kids. His gf recently got a part time job because they were basically out of money. I have mentioned to him in the past about getting a job but he replies with "I will", "i am looking" or more recently "when im ready"

His gf has got application forms for him but he usually says he wouldnt enjoy that type of work. I will encourage his gf to tell him how she feels and when I get home have a nice adult chat with him. Not sure if I can tell him to stop playing computer games as I was the one who got him into it.

Thanks for your replies and thoughts,

Hybrids

 

[Hybrids]

She does complaing out his gaming but he would simply refuse such a request,

 

[Hybrids]

there's two options really here:

b) he's insecure, feeling rubbish cos he has no job/is unhappy with something and rather than face up to it he hides in a world where he is either successful or allows him to escape.

That option seems to be the best way to describe it, he tried to stop his gf from getting a job for a while because it made him feel bad.

Just out of interest with no job but playing on the computer constantly how could he afford the electricity bill?!

They struggle but I think it comes down to family allowance and benefits like that.

Hybrids, his GF needs to do what I am doing and that is to pull that blue ethernet cable from the back of his machine and cut it in two.

Force him to confront what is happening...

That is exactly what she should do, but when she takes it out, he will put it back in. If she takes it out again he would simply get mad(no more than mad).

I think that if he's forced to confront whats happening he will either say "yeah your right I'll change" to which he never will but just say it to get me off his back or he will get angry and distance himself more.

From evernones comments I will confront him with other friend and try to be civil and adult as possible.

Hybrids