English the Official EU language!

mmj_uk

mmj_uk

mmj_uk

Caporegime
Joined
26 Dec 2003
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Who says we are losing our identity. :)

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as 'Euro-English'.

In the first year, 's' will replace the soft 'c'. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard 'c' will be dropped in favour of 'k'. This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome 'ph' will be replaced with 'f'. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent 'e' in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th' with 'z' and 'w'with 'v'.

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou' and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi TU understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.
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To be honest, EVERYONE speaks English...i can't get over the fact my girlfriend could speak fluent English and her native Spanish language from such an early age and just being
able to switch between the two! :o
 
It is pretty shameful to think that most EU countries have a large proportion of their natives that can speak perfect english, yet very few english learn foreign languages.

But then again, easier for us :p and everyone knows english is the best language.
 
It is pretty shameful to think that most EU countries have a large proportion of their natives that can speak perfect english, yet very few english learn foreign languages.
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not really when you consider the fact we have no need to learn a second language.

if most of the world spoke mandarin im sure most of us would be fluent in that ;)
 
G-MAN2004 said:
Mandarin is the most spoken language (last time I checked). Shouldn't we be learning that?
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Sure but German does,in reality, has most native speakers within Europe.Maybe this status quo will change but this hasnt so far made people rush for learning German(though I like it and think that some people are wrong to bash it, labelling it as "hard","nazi" or simply "ugly sounding").

As for the joke, gotta agree its old but still original and could be fun to the people that see it for first time.
 
elitetrick said:
It is pretty shameful to think that most EU countries have a large proportion of their natives that can speak perfect english, yet very few english learn foreign languages.

But then again, easier for us :p and everyone knows english is the best language.
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English is the more profitable language simple as.
 
English is the world business language, and the EU was supposed to be for business... German shouldn't really be a consideration as the official language.
 
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