How do you compromise with your partner on what to watch?

Scam

Scam

Scam

Soldato
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Ok, so this is a thread clearly born out of too much time stuck at home due to Christmas holidays/part-lockdown etc. but I'm getting frustrated here! I have so many TV shows and movies I want to watch, we all know there's too much out there but I'm still pretty selective. Problem is my other half just does not show much interest in watching anything at all. I completely understand she'd never want to dive into something like GoT/fantasy, and she's never really liked sci-fi either, but it seems the list of what is of no interest to her is getting longer and longer recently.

Yes I know, "get a new one" etc. :p but what do you generally do with regards to picking movies to watch? Do you take turns picking a film? Do you try and compromise each time? How do you compromise when you are the one with the ever-expanding watchlist and your partner has no interest or idea what they're about? I seem to spend my early-evenings explaining a variety of movie premises to her in a bid to agree to watch watch any of them :o

First world problems..
 
This old chestnut. Honestly its largely impossible to please both parties unless you both like the same things or both parties are willing to take turns picking the show. It all depends on your partner.

I have largely given up on suggesting things to watch if I don't think my partner will be interested as she will sit there on her phone the whole time, barely paying any attention to the film and then declare that it was crap and she didn't like it. I will just watch them on my own when I have the time.

There are enough things that we both enjoy however so its not really an issue until I am talking to friends about shows/films and she gets grumpy that I didn't watch these things with her.
 
fez said:
This old chestnut.
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Indeed! I can't be the only one here. I don't believe everyone on here is either a bachelor living their best life, or has two TVs to separate viewing habits (that sounds sad to me!)

fez said:
I will just watch them on my own when I have the time.
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Yeah. Problem is I want to watch movies and good TV dramas in the evening. If she doesn't want to then it's a case of feeling like I'm wasting my hours watching Location x3 or other such nonsense that is just "on" and doesn't require choosing anything. Whereas there's a perfectly acceptable 2hrs after dinner to watch something decent, it's the best use of time right!
 
I just introduced mine to quality films and showed her that there was more to "entertainment" than soaps and what I call "lift music TV". We've never looked back.
Anyone who is up with watching the Kardashian, TOWIE or any "reality" (quotes fully intended) needs to get a grip. BTW, that's her opinion, as well as mine.
 
Get a Quest 2 VR headset and stream what you want to watch to the big screen in the headset. just take it in turns in who wears the headset and who watches the real TV.
 
Perhaps stick with films for a bit? They require a lot less time investment and you’re able to then share your thoughts and have a decent conversation about the whole story arc (as opposed to whatever mundane carrot they are dangling in front of you for your ‘next thrilling episode’). You can then refine your tastes further, together.

Also, read the room - don’t gravitate towards something you know she won’t like. Save that for yourself.
 
We generally take it in turns to choose what to watch movie wise but also have a 10 minute rule in that if the other isn't enjoying the film after ten minutes, something else goes on. Neither one of us will make the other endure a movie they don't enjoy.

Our tastes after 14 years are fairly closely aligned though, when it comes to TV shows, she pretty much watches all I like and I watch most of what she likes (there is a small contigent of shows which I just can't get on with that she's happy to plough through when I have an early night)

Just happy she's not into vacuous nonsense like reality TV or soaps. She's watched the entirety of shows like Babylon 5, Breaking Bad, Game Of Thrones, BSG and so on with me despite not being sure at the start of each.

Currently trying to get her to warm to Gomorrah, she's not a native English speaker to subtitles can be hard work for her. However she did watch Squid Game subtitled so if the show is good enough, she will endure them and Gomorrah most certainly is. She won't watch dubbed TV even to her own language, we both hate dubbed TV/movies.
 
I have the same issue sometimes. Don't think there's an easy way out really!

If I get frustrated the gf not wanting to watch a certain type of film or TV show I do try and remember how picky I can be at times though. Eg I like Lord of the Rings and want to rewatch it every now and then, but have to be in the right mood - despite liking the films very much, most of the time I wouldn't actually want to watch them. Helps me to be more understanding when the gf doesn't want to watch the same sort of film I do.

Scam said:
Yeah. Problem is I want to watch movies and good TV dramas in the evening. If she doesn't want to then it's a case of feeling like I'm wasting my hours watching Location x3 or other such nonsense that is just "on" and doesn't require choosing anything. Whereas there's a perfectly acceptable 2hrs after dinner to watch something decent, it's the best use of time right!
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I feel the same way sometimes, especially when the 'compromise' is something rubbish on TV, or some very light and forgettable series. In that event I do usually end up watching a bit of whatever it is (and occasionally actually enjoy it anyway!) but if I end up getting annoyed and not enjoying whatever it is I try to take myself off to do my own thing, otherwise you just end up feeling resentful.
 
Usually by agreeing to watch at least 3 or 4 episodes of any chosen series without throwing in the towel. Seems to work pretty well for us and we very rarely give up on anything.:)
 
Wife bought the TV, Sky box, Netflix and whatever else we have. She watches whatever the hell she wants.
I bought and built my PC, so I go upstairs and watch whatever the hell I want in 1440p... Occasionally we'll have a shared interest, but even then I mostly watch it on my own time.
 
Easy compromise.

She asks me to choose from 4 things she wants to watch and I say don't care.
 
Nitefly said:
Perhaps stick with films for a bit? They require a lot less time investment and you’re able to then share your thoughts and have a decent conversation about the whole story arc (as opposed to whatever mundane carrot they are dangling in front of you for your ‘next thrilling episode’).
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It's actually movies that are causing most of the issues. I generally keep abreast of movies news etc, listen to Kermode's podcast, quite easily know what's decent at the moment and where to stream it. By that nature all of my watchlists for films are ever-expanding, and most movies I suggest are received with a blank look, or a "Oh I'm not sure about that". I'm not talking about crazy foreign arthouse movies, just you know, this years Oscars lists or something.

SixTwoSix said:
Just happy she's not into vacuous nonsense like reality TV or soaps
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I'm sure you weren't insinuating (!!), but my other half isn't either -- otherwise she would have been given the boot by now :p She just prefers an "easy watch". Stuff like Death in Paradise, Poirot... she views TV/movies more like a comfort blanket on an evening whereas depending on my mood, I like pretty much anything if it's good.

MissChief said:
When I was in a relationship we'd discuss what we wanted to watch and then compromise by deciding to watch what she wanted anyway.
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:p

A friend of mine just posted his year in review from Letterboxd. Anyone use it? Wondering if it has some sort of family lists feature!
 
We've had 41 years of a very successful marriage so our method works.
As you can see from the photo she is in her room and I'm in mine, my two 32" monitors are to my right.
Very soon she will be finishing Call the Midwife and I'll go into her side until around 11:30pm where we will watch mainly documentaries done by Guy Martin, Bettany Hughes, Martin Clunes, Tony Robinson and a 100 more people we find interesting.
We very rarely watch films or TV series together so we watch them on our own TVs.
Probably another reason why the marriage has survived is because even though we watch our own stuff we are still in the same room.
I can even sit here recording songs, playing instruments at full volume and she won't hear a thing.

tv.jpg
 
Its the same visiting relatives for xmas etc we get on fine no friction whatsoever... except for TV we just don't see eye to eye at all I can't bear sitting through hours of the most tedious tv programming you can imagine in the daytime you can at least get out and about but the evenings are endless

SexyGreyFox said:
We've had 41 years of a very successful marriage so our method works.
As you can see from the photo she is in her room and I'm in mine, my two 32" monitors are to my right.
Very soon she will be finishing Call the Midwife and I'll go into her side until around 11:30pm where we will watch mainly documentaries done by Guy Martin, Bettany Hughes, Martin Clunes, Tony Robinson and a 100 more people we find interesting.
We very rarely watch films or TV series together so we watch them on our own TVs.
Probably another reason why the marriage has survived is because even though we watch our own stuff we are still in the same room.
I can even sit here recording songs, playing instruments at full volume and she won't hear a thing.

tv.jpg
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Separate lounges its the only way :p

How do you put up with the sound bleed from one room to the other? Oh you've the one with the headphones, got it.
 
My partner loves trash TV but is also happy as Larry watching a black and white silent film, so fortunately we meet eye to eye a lot of the time! Failing that she or I watch something on our laptop/phone or do something else entirely!
 
We either watch the same thing. Or she watches what she wants whilst I'm doing other stuff (internet, Gaming, Trading etc) and when she has other stuff to do I'll watch my stuff. Never an issue really. Apart from soaps we have similar interests... Luckily our lives dont revolve around the TV anymore
 
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