How not to sell a car..

[Sneaky Peaky]

1) Take some really bad pics, preferably in the street and in a suspiciously dodgy looking area

2) Make sure the car is as dirty as possible and portrays the fullness of it's neglect

3) Ruin said car with what looks like hand sprayed matt black wheels.

4) Complete the advert in text speak and make sure it is full of spelling and grammatical errors.

5) Slip in the fact that is a CAT D due to vandalism and has been resprayed presumably in the garage by the same mate who did the wheels.

6) Say it's only done 11 miles ? wtf ?

Here ladies and gentleman is a perfect example from a master of the art for you all to follow

http://www.pistonheads.com/sales/1505058.htm

 

[OllyM]

as you can see you are making a 5/7 pound saving with a zm coupe this year

Yes, I see!

 

[bledd]

7 ) make sure you use a block of text with no punctuation make sure you use a block of text with no punctuation make sure you use a block of text with no punctuation make sure you use a block of text with no punctuation make sure you use a block of text with no punctuation make sure you use a block of text with no punctuation make sure you use a block of text with no punctuation make sure you use a block of text with no punctuation make sure you use a block of text with no punctuation make sure you use a block of text with no punctuation make sure you use a block of text with no punctuation make sure you use a block of text with no punctuation make sure you use a block of text with no punctuation make sure you use a block of text with no punctuation make sure you use a block of text with no punctuation make sure you use a block of text with no punctuation make sure you use a block of text with no punctuation

 

[peterattheboro]

He might want to jump back in his wardrobe and stop creating car adverts

 

[Gaygle]

this comes with full sevice history witch

:\ sounds spooky

 

[Firestar_3x]

I'm intrigued as to what a "Service History Witch" looks like, i can only assume its like a car cloner but in drag?

 

[Gaygle]

The car doesn't even have CSL alloys like he claimed 3 times. They look like BBS CH's and my guess would be fake's.

 

[Gaygle]

I'm intrigued as to what a "Service History Witch" looks like, i can only assume its like a car cloner but in drag?

Or maybe she can conjure false service history from thin air?

 

[antijoke]

Nice ad. Lol.

 

[Firestar_3x]

Or maybe she can conjure false service history from thin air?

Sounds ideal:



I've only got MsPaint on my works machine

 

[-Ad-]

Generic OcUK surname generalisation racist comment

 

[Infam0us]

Sounds ideal:



I've only got MsPaint on my works machine

Epic

 

[Gaygle]

I've only got MsPaint on my works machine

It only makes it better

 

[Hxc]

Those BBS wheels (fake or not) look ace, though...

 

[jellybeard999]

To top it off, I almost thought he was called Jerome Asian

 

[Clarkey]

What's wrong with the wheels? I can see no evidence that the finish isn't top notch.

 

[TomO]

location is england as well. handy!

 

[Jez]

The advert is shockingly written.

However, the car looks ok, and would likely be a good buy if you do not mind the car having a catD on its record. It has FBMWSH, and full BMW warranty. There is no evidence that the paintwork on either the wheels, or the car, is not professionally done.

Some people simply have issues with the written word, this does not make their cars dodgy. The area looks like a fairly typical residential area, i am not sure why you refer to it as dodgy either.

 

[d_brennen]

location is england as well. handy!

England! That's only a short hop fo me. Think I'll arrange a viewing

 

[K@rl]

make me want to upgrade my Golf with the (every extra stunner) package. Great find.