i'm a terrible car passenger

Baldbloke

Baldbloke

Baldbloke

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Joined
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Location
Thorne Yorkshire
My lass got a new (to her) car yesterday. Normally I do all the driving. Every time. But seeing as how she got her new toy we went for a run. I was in the passenger seat.

She drove perfectly fine. Getting used to a different vehicle. All was good.

But me in the passenger seat? Every bend, every junction, every set of lights, I'm pressing this imaginary brake and clutch. Also thinking "I'd have changed from 3d to 2nd for that bend". Etc, etc.

I kept my mouth shut. I knew I was being overly critical. Like I say, she was perfectly fine but I couldn't stop wanting to be in control of the car.
 
I think that's normal, if you get used to driving then all of a sudden you're in the front of the car but not in control it can screw with you a bit.
 
Yes, it's difficult. I've been in a really bad car crash - I was cut out of my car - so they do somewhat understand. But I do very much prefer to be in the driving seat.
 
I hate driving so I try my best to get others to do it, my wife 99% of the time.
In all my years there's only been about 3 cars I wanted to get out of plus a coach driver last year.
I have noticed my wife has started to get a bit worse, even though I'm a daily cyclist who comes in with lots of near miss stories she now has zero idea how to act around cyclists :(
 
Semple said:
I think that's normal, if you get used to driving then all of a sudden you're in the front of the car but not in control it can screw with you a bit.
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This.

My dad can be very annoying at times (he's generally improved), partly because he's only got partial vision in one eye so every now and then he'll suddenly panic as he registers something and doesn't realise i've been aware of it for several seconds.
I hate being a passenger in my sisters car, in part because she's a very aggressive (fast accel/heavy breaking) and extremely poor situational awareness when parking*.

But in general there is a tendency for you to start to react how you'd drive, and being in the "wrong" seat makes you a bit nervious/throws you off balance.

Although I'd much rather my dad than my older brother, who does not drive, and who has on several occasions leaned across to press the horn because he's seen someone he knows (I was extremely blunt in my response to him doing it, but he still goes to do it, needless to say I no longer let him sit in the adult seat, and don't like him in my car at all).

These days if i'm a passenger in a car I tend to either sit in the back and just relax (close my eyes, head back and rest), or try to concentrate on something else.


*I'm never loaning her my car again, the last three times it came back with scratches/damage to the bumpers that she claimed no knowledge of, oddly enough one of them matched damage a scrape along a wall where she lived, my blue car got a white masonary paint, the white painted wall got blue paint that just happened to be the same shade and at bumper level..
 
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I am the same plus I get car sick if I am not driving. My ex mother in law used to really scare me as she always braked late and hard when coming up to junctions. She got past the point where I would start slowing down and I would be going for the pedals that weren't there. She was a lovely person but a terrible driver.
 
My wife is a really safe driver so I'm quite relaxed with her, if anything I'm pressing my accelerator, particularly at junctions.



On the other hand she is an incredibly nervous passenger, probably because of an accident which was not her fault and was unavoidable.



As a result I've really changed how I drive by being defensive, smoother and just generally zen. I enjoy driving again, almost nothing will stress me out (except if I'm lost) .



The Ashely Neal driving YouTube channel has helped me change my attitude to driving too.
 
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pastymuncher said:
I am the same plus I get car sick if I am not driving. My ex mother in law used to really scare me as she always braked late and hard when coming up to junctions. She got past the point where I would start slowing down and I would be going for the pedals that weren't there. She was a lovely person but a terrible driver.
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My Dad is a late braker too. Does my head in!
 
Werewolf said:
This.

My dad can be very annoying at times (he's generally improved), partly because he's only got partial vision in one eye so every now and then he'll suddenly panic as he registers something and doesn't realise i've been aware of it for several seconds.
I hate being a passenger in my sisters car, in part because she's a very aggressive (fast accel/heavy breaking) and extremely poor situational awareness when parking*.

But in general there is a tendency for you to start to react how you'd drive, and being in the "wrong" seat makes you a bit nervious/throws you off balance.

Although I'd much rather my dad than my older brother, who does not drive, and who has on several occasions leaned across to press the horn because he's seen someone he knows (I was extremely blunt in my response to him doing it, but he still goes to do it, needless to say I no longer let him sit in the adult seat, and don't like him in my car at all).

These days if i'm a passenger in a car I tend to either sit in the back and just relax (close my eyes, head back and rest), or try to concentrate on something else.


*I'm never loaning her my car again, the last three times it came back with scratches/damage to the bumpers that she claimed no knowledge of, oddly enough one of them matched damage a scrape along a wall where she lived, my blue car got a white masonary paint, the white painted wall got blue paint that just happened to be the same shade and at bumper level..
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you're brother! bang out of order.
 
The thing that winds me up is when you let the driver know of a potential hazard and they chastise you for telling them, they saw it already.

Then when they eventually hit something they moan at you for not telling them about it :cry: !

I don't like being a passenger, I'd rather be in the back where I can't see my impending death.
 
seems like the classic case - probably don't need a photo - what is her driving experience ? if she has 10+ years experience and your driving styles are so different, someone is in error;

guess she is not old enough to be verbally criticizing you as you drive .... my child/parent relationship is at that level -
if you've just driven through a pothole/culvert you should have avoided you are going to know about it.
 
It's not leaving enough space to the car in front that gets me, not aggressive tailgating but just limiting your options if something happens and probably annoying the person ahead. No need for it but people don't like being told what to do so i stay quiet now.
 
lakitu said:
you're brother! bang out of order.
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Yarp.

He tried the second time to argue that it was no big issue, as we were not going that fast. We were doing ~15mph in heavy traffic with a lot of pedestrians around, not that the speed really makes any difference given he was interfering with the control of the vehicle (and as I say, he doesn't drive, and has never taken a lesson).
 
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