I'm in a quandary
- Thread starter Redz
- Start date
Too young, if you was 30 years older you would appreciate how bad that joke was.
oh I got the joke, it's just ... really bad... so bad it didn't deserve any sort of reaction.
Man of Honour
- Joined
- 15 Mar 2004
- Posts
- 28,140
- Location
- Liverpool
May as well ask here:
Anybody got that video/link/gif/etc. file where a fat man is on the bus and his stomach drifts into the face of a girl. The girl quite upset at this (puts her knitting down and) loudly gets up and leaves.
Anybody got that video/link/gif/etc. file where a fat man is on the bus and his stomach drifts into the face of a girl. The girl quite upset at this (puts her knitting down and) loudly gets up and leaves.
![[FnG]magnolia](/styles/overclockers/avatars/9.png){kind=avatar}
Caporegime
- Joined
- 29 Aug 2007
- Posts
- 28,770
- Location
- Auckland
What do you call a lady with two vaginas?
N-Dubz
***************
There’s this fellow who’s had enough of modern living – he decides he’d quite like to leave it all behind and become a monk.
So he joins up at his local monastery. On his first day he gets given a tour round by the abbot. He takes him round the dorms, the prayer rooms, library, etc. The guy is pretty impressed by the simple nature of it all, with all the quiet, studious monks.
Finally, the abbot takes him down to the cellar, wherein he shows him a large barrel, mounted on it’s side with a hole in the end.
“Now”, says the abbot, “we are all men here, and we all know that men have certain…ahem…needs. So I want you to know that any time you…feel an urge…you can come down here and make use of the, ah, barrel. You can use it any time you like, except on Thursdays”
“Why not Thursdays?” asks the new monk.
“Because it’s your turn in the barrel on Thursdays”.
************
Johnny walks into the bathroom just as his mother is getting out of the shower. Pointing at her crotch, he asks "What's that?"
Thinking quickly, his mom responds "That's where I got hit with an axe."
"Oh," he says "got you right in the ****, huh?"
***************
Say what you want about pedophiles, but at least they drive slowly past schools.
N-Dubz
***************
There’s this fellow who’s had enough of modern living – he decides he’d quite like to leave it all behind and become a monk.
So he joins up at his local monastery. On his first day he gets given a tour round by the abbot. He takes him round the dorms, the prayer rooms, library, etc. The guy is pretty impressed by the simple nature of it all, with all the quiet, studious monks.
Finally, the abbot takes him down to the cellar, wherein he shows him a large barrel, mounted on it’s side with a hole in the end.
“Now”, says the abbot, “we are all men here, and we all know that men have certain…ahem…needs. So I want you to know that any time you…feel an urge…you can come down here and make use of the, ah, barrel. You can use it any time you like, except on Thursdays”
“Why not Thursdays?” asks the new monk.
“Because it’s your turn in the barrel on Thursdays”.
************
Johnny walks into the bathroom just as his mother is getting out of the shower. Pointing at her crotch, he asks "What's that?"
Thinking quickly, his mom responds "That's where I got hit with an axe."
"Oh," he says "got you right in the ****, huh?"
***************
Say what you want about pedophiles, but at least they drive slowly past schools.
I bought a bookcase to store all my Dusty Springfield records,
But now I've sold them I just don't know what to do with my shelf.
I'll get my coat
I think you should buy some White Stripes records instead.
(the White Stripes covered it on Elephants)
Well I have been spontaneously singing Delilah all week. Started to get embarrasing so i went to the docs. he told me I'd got Tom Jones syndrome! I said, 'is it common for a man of my age'? He said, 'well its not unusual'.
