job application

jamoor

jamoor

jamoor

Soldato
Joined
22 Jun 2005
Posts
9,068
Location
Nottinghamshire
I am currently looking for a job, thing is I have never had a job before, nor ever bothered typing a cv as have never needed to do so,

if someone who has some experience in this field could just take a quick look and lmk if I am on the right lines, that would be some good help :D

I have blanked out private info in case your wondering what the splodges are.

cv
covering letter
 
Im not great at writing CVs but in my opinion you start too many sentances with I, I am, I have ect...

Maybe try re wording parts so that it doesn't sound repetitive.

Apart form that it looks good to me :)
 
Your personal profile seems a bit airy. I think I kept mine to two lines, saying I was honest, hardworking, and seeking a job in XYZ.

By the way, "through understanding" (thorough?)

For you current course, stick to bullet points. I'd go as far to include the "Microsoft Office Specialist Word Expert" under a separate heading rather than mentioning it in the middle of a sentence.

I don't think I like the way you split duties and skills in the table like that, and "Ensuring the customers received correct change and were dealt in a friendly manner was important" is particularly airy...
If you must distinguish between duties and skills, you should mention "Customer service", "timekeeping", "accuracy" and "teamworking".

Page two reads like a short story. Stick to clear headings and bullet points.

Your cover letter is crammed with too much information about the hours you can work. If I was an employer, that would put me off. Simply state that your are seeking a full-time summer position, and part-time hours upon returning to college. Save the ins-and-outs for the interview.

"Advisor" is an American spelling- we spell it "Adviser".

Your cover letter should demonstrate your suitability for the job. Emphasise your computer literacy and how much you enjoy working as part of a dynamic team.
 
To start with personal profiles should be written in a third person perspective as if you were writing about someone else.

so:

Personal Profile

A well motivated and dedicated individual who seeks employment within the retail environment. An excellent team player who is enthusiastic and able to communicate well within a group. Good under pressure and able to work to deadlines while maintaining a high level of service.


That is not brilliant but more like how you are suppose to word it.


Don't use the "I am" to often its a defiant no no on a CV.
 
If you desire to seek a role then you've already accomplished your goal.

You could desire a role or seek a role though!

As said above, too narrative. I understand you may not have much experience yet but it needs cutting down.

Go through your CV, pick up keywords, reorganise your CV in to bulleted paragraphs and sprinkle keywords in to said paragraphs in an orderly fashion.

On top of this, rather than say how you think a business needs to run to be successful, say you are aware of business needs and requirements in the current climate as... if you give an example of your thoughts on something that they have a different opinion about... it doesn't look too good :)
 
Consider adding some hard-hitting bullet points right at the top of your CV, to really shout about your professional qualities.

I know you're young and you're only after a summer job but I think tailored to your own situation they look good. On my CV I've got some BS like:

  • Determined, young IT professional with a broad range of skills
  • Results orientated - motivated by a challenging business environment
  • Organised, responsible, flexible and creative

How about for you..

  • Young, determined student with a positive attitude
  • Organised, responsible, flexible and reliable

I'm sure someone can come up with somethnig far better but it's early :p
 
Dont ever change the format of the paragraphs in your CV, keep them in business format, no indent and a line between paragraphs, same with your covering letter.

First paragraph in your Covering letter should tell them what job you are after and where you saw it advertised if necessary
Second paragraph should describe why you are attracted to the job in the particular company
Third Paragraph should describe anything good you really want them to hear, dont over do it 4 or 5 lines at maximum really
Fourth paragrah thank them for their time and say you look forward to hearing from them.

"Yours faithfully" if you dont know their name and no capital on the second word, there is no gramatical reason for it being there.
 
hmm definately as other people have said, if you're writing in paragraphs on your CV then you're writing too much. IMO your interests etc. should be in bullet points on your CV and then in your covering letter you should relate your skills to your interests. eg. "I have excellent teamwork skills, which have been developed through playing football as part of the school team" [okay that sentence isn't amazingly worded, just an example]

The covering letter is as important if not more important than the CV. Most of what you have written in your personal profile is covering letter material.

Also your personal profile says all these things, but there are no examples. You need to be saying 'My communication skills are excellent, for example...' rather than just 'My communication skills are excellent'

Anyway my key point is that you should list anything remotely relevant in the CV and then in the covering letter relate the most important points to the job.

Note that I'm not involved in employment in any way. Actually I've never successfully got a job from an interview. But most of my applications have resulted in being invited to an interview.

:)
 
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