23 Sep 2009 at 17:01 #41 markweatherill markweatherill Soldato Joined 16 Jun 2009 Posts 2,566 Location Bucks Has nobody said: Knock knock / Who's there? / Michael Jackson / ... yet?
23 Sep 2009 at 17:04 #42 Greenlizard0 Greenlizard0 Man of Honour Joined 15 Mar 2004 Posts 28,140 Location Liverpool What's pink and sm...oh sorry, wrong age group.
23 Sep 2009 at 17:09 #43 rypt rypt Soldato Joined 22 Mar 2008 Posts 11,922 Location London DampCat said: What goes peck.. BANG, peck... BANG, peck... BANG? Chicken in a minefield. (was my favourite joke as a lad) Click to expand... I prefer Suck Squeeze Bang Blow personally
DampCat said: What goes peck.. BANG, peck... BANG, peck... BANG? Chicken in a minefield. (was my favourite joke as a lad) Click to expand... I prefer Suck Squeeze Bang Blow personally
23 Sep 2009 at 17:10 #44 _dogma_ _dogma_ Associate Joined 11 Oct 2005 Posts 2,113 Location Kirkcaldy. Guy walks into a bar. He says, "ow!!" (I love that joke!!) Horse walks into a bar. Barman says,"why the long face?" What's this (Hand in a claw shape, upside down)? A dead one of these (Spider movements with said hand)!
Guy walks into a bar. He says, "ow!!" (I love that joke!!) Horse walks into a bar. Barman says,"why the long face?" What's this (Hand in a claw shape, upside down)? A dead one of these (Spider movements with said hand)!
23 Sep 2009 at 17:13 #45 WrathOfAchilles WrathOfAchilles Associate Joined 28 Jan 2005 Posts 1,124 A mummy and her child went to a supermarket to do some shopping. While the mummy ignored the child and went about her business the child banged his head and died. Mummy is now trying to sue the supermarket.
A mummy and her child went to a supermarket to do some shopping. While the mummy ignored the child and went about her business the child banged his head and died. Mummy is now trying to sue the supermarket.
23 Sep 2009 at 17:17 #46 KennyBhoy KennyBhoy Soldato Joined 22 Feb 2003 Posts 3,889 Location Glasgow Knock Knock..... Who's there?..... Bear...... Bear who? Bear Bum.....
23 Sep 2009 at 17:21 #47 Dinomania Dinomania Soldato Joined 21 Apr 2003 Posts 4,328 _dogma_ said: Guy walks into a bar. He says, "ow!!" (I love that joke!!) Horse walks into a bar. Barman says,"why the long face?" What's this (Hand in a claw shape, upside down)? A dead one of these (Spider movements with said hand)! Click to expand... Oh TOTAL tickling opportunity with kids there too!
_dogma_ said: Guy walks into a bar. He says, "ow!!" (I love that joke!!) Horse walks into a bar. Barman says,"why the long face?" What's this (Hand in a claw shape, upside down)? A dead one of these (Spider movements with said hand)! Click to expand... Oh TOTAL tickling opportunity with kids there too!
23 Sep 2009 at 17:31 #48 Aero Aero Soldato Joined 19 Sep 2007 Posts 3,149 Some personal favourites! What do you call an astronauts watch? A lunar-tic! When do astronauts eat? Launch time If pig skins make shoes what do banana skins make? Slippers What kind of fruit tried to conquer the world? Alexander the Grape What goes zzub zzub? a bee flying backwards What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? A wooly jumper Whats black and white and eats like a horse? A zebra Whats black and white and make a lot of noise? A zebra on a drumkit Whats black and white and goes red at the push of a button? Penguin in a blender Two biscuits are crossing the road when one gets run over, the other biscuit says "Oh crumbs" Why did the man take a pencil to bed? So he could draw the curtains. I think most of those are kid friendly. Have fun!
Some personal favourites! What do you call an astronauts watch? A lunar-tic! When do astronauts eat? Launch time If pig skins make shoes what do banana skins make? Slippers What kind of fruit tried to conquer the world? Alexander the Grape What goes zzub zzub? a bee flying backwards What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? A wooly jumper Whats black and white and eats like a horse? A zebra Whats black and white and make a lot of noise? A zebra on a drumkit Whats black and white and goes red at the push of a button? Penguin in a blender Two biscuits are crossing the road when one gets run over, the other biscuit says "Oh crumbs" Why did the man take a pencil to bed? So he could draw the curtains. I think most of those are kid friendly. Have fun!
23 Sep 2009 at 17:38 #49 Dinomania Dinomania Soldato Joined 21 Apr 2003 Posts 4,328 What goes "Ha, ha, bonk"? A man laughing his head off!
23 Sep 2009 at 17:41 #50 Evil^ Evil^ Associate Joined 11 Mar 2009 Posts 685 Never mind....Sigh Last edited: 23 Sep 2009
23 Sep 2009 at 17:46 #51 Russinating Russinating Soldato Joined 27 Dec 2005 Posts 17,317 Location Bristol Oh dear god, punctuation fail? ^^ martinweston said: A mummy and her child went to a supermarket to do some shopping. While the mummy ignored the child and went about her business the child banged his head and died. Mummy is now trying to sue the supermarket. Click to expand... lol
Oh dear god, punctuation fail? ^^ martinweston said: A mummy and her child went to a supermarket to do some shopping. While the mummy ignored the child and went about her business the child banged his head and died. Mummy is now trying to sue the supermarket. Click to expand... lol
23 Sep 2009 at 18:02 #52 Le_Petit_Lapin Le_Petit_Lapin Soldato Joined 5 Sep 2005 Posts 11,742 Location Northern Ireland Guess what's for dinner! "Your pet rabbit!" They always squeal with delight at this one.
23 Sep 2009 at 18:03 #53 _dogma_ _dogma_ Associate Joined 11 Oct 2005 Posts 2,113 Location Kirkcaldy. Just remembered some more. What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Cliff. What to you call a man with a shovel on his head? Doug. What do you call a man in a pile of leaves? Russell. What do you get if you cross a elephant with a kangaroo? Holes all over Australia. What do you call a dyslexic dot? Tod. What does a dyslexic sheep/cow say? aaab/oom. Knock, knock. Who's there? Interupting sheep. Interrupting shee..... BAA!!
Just remembered some more. What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Cliff. What to you call a man with a shovel on his head? Doug. What do you call a man in a pile of leaves? Russell. What do you get if you cross a elephant with a kangaroo? Holes all over Australia. What do you call a dyslexic dot? Tod. What does a dyslexic sheep/cow say? aaab/oom. Knock, knock. Who's there? Interupting sheep. Interrupting shee..... BAA!!
23 Sep 2009 at 22:28 #54 doopydug doopydug Soldato Joined 18 Oct 2002 Posts 2,827 Location Fife _dogma_ said: What to you call a man with a shovel on his head? Doug. Click to expand... What do you call a man who has lost his alsation ? Doug less
_dogma_ said: What to you call a man with a shovel on his head? Doug. Click to expand... What do you call a man who has lost his alsation ? Doug less
23 Sep 2009 at 22:30 #55 BigglesPiP BigglesPiP Soldato Joined 8 Mar 2006 Posts 13,311 Location Telemark http://www.amazon.co.uk/101-ELEPHAN...=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1253741439&sr=8-1