Looking for advice...

I get why you might pay, because it's about opting out of the stress and drawing a line under it. Can't give in to this type of behaviour though, I could get over the short term stress of making a stand but not caving to this guys nonsense.
 
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Shep_Cobain said:
After I made it clear that I was at work, would not be paying, and would not be discussing this any further, I received the following message:

“I will just come to yours. I’m not going to let this rest until it’s sorted.”

At that point, I replied:

“I’m at work until Wednesday and can’t answer calls.
I’ve already made my position clear — I won’t be paying and I’m not discussing this, or the reasons why, any further.
Do not come to my house.
I’m not spending any more time or energy on this.”

The response to that was:

“It’s gone way past the money. Trust me.”
“Trust me, it isn’t done.”
“Can’t say what you have. See you Wednesday.”

I then replied once more, solely because of the implication of turning up at my home:

“If you come to my house when I am spending time with my family, I will be ringing the police. This is the last time I will message or reply.”

Following that, I received the following messages in quick succession:

“Ring them.”
“Fine by me.”
“What are you going to say? You’ve done me over for £100 and won’t answer the phone?”
“Could have been sorted weeks ago, but you’ve left it.”

“You’re not just a friend — you’re the godfather to my son. Clearly none of this means anything, or you would have sorted this before any of this mess.”

Later that same day, I then received this longer message:

“Not the way I thought my year would end for us. I can tell from how you’ve been that this is nothing to you, but to me I’m hurt. I’ve thought about it a lot and it’s upset me when I think about the whole thing and how you’ve been for so long — forgetting a birthday, the list of things I’ve done and not done, the damage to the vehicle that you forgot about. I think maybe this is what you wanted to happen. No other reason for it.

Friends simply don’t treat friends this way. You have the ability to just turn it off and that’s fine. I’m gutted I’ve lost my best mate. You played a big part in our lives for years, main man at my wedding, but more importantly I’m heartbroken for my child. I’ll get accused of blackmailing if I mention my child, but I know how much he adores you. He and the girls ask to see you, FaceTime you again — you never come to see him, never nip in when you’re on the estate, never FaceTime to see him, and that makes me cry. Not for me, but for him. You don’t care about any of this, but I want you to know we do.

Have a good Christmas.”
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This is quite frankly shocking behaviour from a friend. In much of this he needs to eat his own words "Friends simply don't treat friends this way". He's so wrapped up in his narcissistic views that he can't even see how this would look from your side, or even a third party. Then to basically use his children as weapons to say that he's heartbroken for them - there's nothing stopping them from seeing you without their dad present.

Not to have a dig, but I don't think you've handled the situation very well at all. I get the not wanting confrontation with a friend, but burying your head in the sand and hoping it just goes away has probably riled up the guy further. It should have been made clearer that there was no offer of payment for services at the beginning, and that his behaviour isn't something that a friend would do to another friend.
 
Shep_Cobain said:
After I made it clear that I was at work, would not be paying, and would not be discussing this any further, I received the following message:

“I will just come to yours. I’m not going to let this rest until it’s sorted.”

At that point, I replied:

“I’m at work until Wednesday and can’t answer calls.
I’ve already made my position clear — I won’t be paying and I’m not discussing this, or the reasons why, any further.
Do not come to my house.
I’m not spending any more time or energy on this.”

The response to that was:

“It’s gone way past the money. Trust me.”
“Trust me, it isn’t done.”
“Can’t say what you have. See you Wednesday.”

I then replied once more, solely because of the implication of turning up at my home:

“If you come to my house when I am spending time with my family, I will be ringing the police. This is the last time I will message or reply.”

Following that, I received the following messages in quick succession:

“Ring them.”
“Fine by me.”
“What are you going to say? You’ve done me over for £100 and won’t answer the phone?”
“Could have been sorted weeks ago, but you’ve left it.”

“You’re not just a friend — you’re the godfather to my son. Clearly none of this means anything, or you would have sorted this before any of this mess.”

Later that same day, I then received this longer message:

“Not the way I thought my year would end for us. I can tell from how you’ve been that this is nothing to you, but to me I’m hurt. I’ve thought about it a lot and it’s upset me when I think about the whole thing and how you’ve been for so long — forgetting a birthday, the list of things I’ve done and not done, the damage to the vehicle that you forgot about. I think maybe this is what you wanted to happen. No other reason for it.

Friends simply don’t treat friends this way. You have the ability to just turn it off and that’s fine. I’m gutted I’ve lost my best mate. You played a big part in our lives for years, main man at my wedding, but more importantly I’m heartbroken for my child. I’ll get accused of blackmailing if I mention my child, but I know how much he adores you. He and the girls ask to see you, FaceTime you again — you never come to see him, never nip in when you’re on the estate, never FaceTime to see him, and that makes me cry. Not for me, but for him. You don’t care about any of this, but I want you to know we do.

Have a good Christmas.”
Click to expand...
Should've blocked his number a week ago. You are letting him continue to send emotional sob story's to you to manipulate you.
Block him immediately. And stop replying soo nicely. You're like a fish he's caught and he's slowly reeling you in. Cut the line.
 
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