Mates ex

Siliconslave · 27 Feb 2006 at 00:00

ok... so i'm getting along rather well with a mates ex and i'm beginning to wonder what "the rules" are like on this....

They split up about a 6 months ago and hes got a gf, and has naffed off to Auz to see her for a couple of months.

I can see this getting really akward, but equally i'm pretty interested in her and we get along way too well. Hes moved on so why shouldn't she....

so OCUK - what do you think?

Siliconslave · 27 Feb 2006 at 00:04

Mic said:
Ask yer mate what he thinks.

as i say hes out in Auz atm, might drop him an e-mail but it feels kinda impersonal

Siliconslave · 27 Feb 2006 at 13:07

Cheers guys, the mate in question isn't one of my closer ones, but more someone in one of my friendship groups, only really got to know him more recently.

I think i'll give it a while and see if anything comes of it then txt / ring him and just keep him upto date, giving him a chance to express any concerns and take them on board

Siliconslave · 27 Feb 2006 at 15:33

Borris said:
Make sure that you ask when you are both standing at a urinal.

That way, he will be so shocked by your disregard for one taboo, he won't mind you disregarding the other.

lamo

although its not taboo if your both in the same situation, waiting/washing/urinating however otherwise its totally not done if your not at the same place

Siliconslave · 27 Feb 2006 at 15:37

oh bloody hell, just found out one of my better friends has had a huge crush on her for ages, and is now getting very funny about things...
might be best to just walk away from the whole big mess! Why can live never be easy!

Siliconslave · 27 Feb 2006 at 15:47

Bracco said:
Do you really think that the guy would be in a relationship with someone else if he still had feelings for his ex? He can't be with someone else and stop his ex being happy.

there is a vague suggestion that he pretty much instigated the brake up to go off with the new lady, they did get together pretty quickly after thinking about it...

edit: I think you always have some kind of feeling for exs, specially long term ones. You can't spend that much time with someone and not. Although if anything seriously bad happens between the two of you that will more than likely override any positive feels you had for them

Siliconslave · 27 Feb 2006 at 15:51

Bracco said:
So basically, men can do what they want and get into new relationships just, because, but women aren't allowed to get on with their lives?

i don't think its the sex of the people thats making the difference mate, for one thing Otacon never said if was him or the girl he was going out with that had the feeling...

Siliconslave · 27 Feb 2006 at 16:30

Borris said:
This is all starting to sound like a Shakespearean tragedy.

your telling me mate! Oh, I am fortune's fool!

Siliconslave · 27 Feb 2006 at 18:21

<(Multi)> said:
...Hell, why not cut out the middle man (or woman in this case ) and just sleep with you're mate - gross...

But if she's really really fit, bang her first

erm... yesssssss so do you only date virgins then?

Siliconslave · 2 Mar 2006 at 10:13

Right, well quick update on this, been fretting about it for a while tried to call him last night. Didn't get through so texted asking if there was a good place / time to call and he asked me to mail him.... just waiting for a reply!

Siliconslave · 7 Mar 2006 at 14:14

well... finally got a text back from him saying "not sure how it will effect things, will see when i get back next week" .... so next week could be interesting

in other news myself and his ex are getting along like a house on fire

ain't been this happy for ages so hope it doesn't screw up other areas of my life.... karma and all that

Siliconslave · 7 Mar 2006 at 16:04

Old Turkey said:
Well that is what you get when you relinquish your decision making power to someone else. You completely put the Ball in his Court when you didn't have to. Why relinquish anything if you don't have to?

didn't relinquish anything, basically said something along the lines of
"Wanted you to hear from me first, not some half baked rumors but i'm going out with <your ex>, hope this won't weird you out too much and screw up our friendship."

agw_01 said:
Out of interest, who dumped who?

supposidly it was mutual, she doesn't mind seeing him around with his new g/f, although she wasn't too happy when they got together days after the brake (has been over a year now afaik....) and they were going out for 3 years, but i didn't really know her then, and only got to know him properly in the last year or so, all though we've crossed over friendship circles